Chapter 62
Pershey's Point of View
"I'm your sister, Pershey." —That is what exactly she said that made me stopped.
I thought for a moment what she meant. It occurred to me that she considered me her sister even though we were not really sisters.
So, thanks, because she considers me as her sister. I thought it wasn't, because Bria and I weren't really sisters. She's just adopted by my parents and she said that she's an orphan.
I was about to speak but I chose to step back. Bria and I had no destination. It’s just crazy to talk to a drunk woman.
"I am serious, Pershey," she said afterward, which I heard, but I continued to walk quite slowly.
She's getting crazy and who is she to tell me that I know nothing about myself? Who is she? She didn’t know me yet and she knew nothing of my daily life. And what does she know of me? Why does she say she knows me so well?
Wait! About the pictures ... is that what she is referring to?
I suddenly stopped when the pictures I had seen came back to my mind.
“By the way,” I said while thinking about what I would say next. I was still standing and turning my back on her. "Why don't you post on your wall the pictures in the box under your bed," I continued and I looked at her. She blinked a million times while looking into my eyes.
Was she surprised by what I said or did she just not expect what I would say?
"W-what?"
I almost laughed at her question that was obviously shocked at just the tone of her voice.
Tears seemed to be welling up in my eyes. My wet eyes are already dry. I couldn't stop myself from crying either. I tried my best to stop my tears from falling because I hate to cry but I cried.
"W-w-what d-d-do you mean?" she stuttered the question, so I laughed a little sarcastically then stepped a little closer to her again.
“Would you please display our pictures together on the wall in your room?”
"P-pershey– d-did you see that?"
"I'm cute in the picture of the two of us, especially my picture from your debut," I said jokingly, mixed with a little laughter.
Her tongue was almost bent at what I said. Her eyes also widened as she was obviously shocked by what I said.
I just laughed as I looked at her when tears suddenly dripped down her cheeks from her manly eyes. Gradually my laughter subsided as her tears continued to flow.
She is so tearful! I'm not hurting her! I was just talking but she was crying right away! What is there in what I am saying? It's true, what I told her are true! So, why does she still have to cry? I feel guilty again.
I could not speak or even tell her to wipe away her tears or to stop crying and stop crying.
I just turned around, so that I could no longer watch her tears continue to flow like a river.
I sighed deeply than the ocean.
"Why do you have to cry?" I asked and started to step away. I wanted for her to respond but a few steps later, she still didn't speak. I didn't even wait for what she would say and would have taken another step when she said something.
I stopped as if I hadn’t expected.
"We are sisters," she said. "You are my half-sister in real life," she added. I can't seem to feel my heart. I can't seem to hear my heartbeat. I can't seem to feel my body. My ears seemed to ring at what she said and even my mind exploded suddenly.
I can't speak. I couldn’t seem to figure out where my tongue was. I couldn’t seem to pronounce the words in my mind. I don’t seem to know what to do anymore.
I just turned around and stood as if I was nailed to where I was standing. I seem to have become a statue. I am no longer in my own consciousness.
I could no longer feel anything around me, but I could, but I suddenly felt Bria’s body hugging my back. Her cheek also touched my back, so my heart seemed to be pounding so hard that it made me hold my chest.
"W-we're sisters," she said. No words came out of my mouth as if I was no longer in my own consciousness. "You're my father's daughter," she added which made my mind even more confused. I feel my chest tighten again as if I can't breathe and I'm chasing my breath. It seemed like myself was missing and I couldn’t find anywhere else to be there.
I seem to be in tears that I can’t stop.
"S-s-s-sorry."
I want to speak but my mouth was shut and my mind was filled with thoughts and questions. I can't no longer take this anymore.
"F-forgive, f-f-forgive us, Pershey."
It was as if my tongue had been cut out which caused me to be unable to speak. I can't even swear.
Not even if I insisted or wanted to shut up and ask questions, and look at her, I couldn’t. My body couldn't even move. My intestines seemed to be being pulled up and my heart was slowly breaking. My eyes could feel the tears welling up, so my vision was blurred because of the water in my eyes.
"Pershey, forgi—" I didn't finish what she was going to say when I moved my body that is sign for her to not hug me. That is exactly what she did. I could feel her looking at me even though I was still turning my back on her.
I closed my eyes tightly and the tears welled up in my eyes. I was just swallowing saliva as my tears flowed.
I must be happy tonight! I shouldn’t feel this way! I should be happy and having fun. I shouldn’t feel this way but this is how I feel.
She said .... are we sisters? Am I her father's daughter? What does she mean? Is she just drunk? Is she just lying to me again? Is she just pranking me? Is she trying to fool me again? Or ... is that true?
Gradually my body faced her and looked straight into her eyes.
Her little red eyes shows her feeling. Her eyes shows something that I couldn't understand.
I just looked up at the dark sky. ‘Oh, God, help me.’
"S-s-sorry," she stammered, so I looked at her. "S-sorry — ahh"
I couldn't stop my hand from touching her cheek which is why she stopped saying sorry. I didn't expect that I could slap her. She was still holding her cheek as she looked at me as if still hesitant.
The wind blew me away to restrain myself from crying again.
“I am so sorry,” she apologized but I shook my head and tries to stop my tears.
I averted my gaze into something else around us. I don't want to look into her eyes again. I don't want to hurt her because I'm hurting even more.
“Forgive me, Pershey. I-i-i lied and I'm so sorry. ”
"You're just lying," I insisted to her as I glanced at her slightly and immediately avoided.
“Believe me or not, we are sisters, Pershey. Y-you're not your mommy's real daughter,” she defended but I just shook my head.
She was just drunk, so she said that. Why should I believe? She has no evidence to prove what she says.
She's a liar! She's just lying to me!
"I am the real daughter and only daughter of Mama Shirane," she said, so I suddenly looked at her. My eyebrows met as I looked at her. “You are not S-santiago. Y-you are not my Mama's daughter,” she added. My heart seemed to stop beating. Various knives seemed to be stabbing my whole body. I seem to be collapsing. “I’m telling the truth. You're just Daddy's daughter to another woman, Pershey. Y-you're not Mom's daughter. W-we're half-sisters, Pershey. B-believe me. I'm telling you the tru— ”
"Enough! Liar!"
“No! I'm not lying, Pershey. I'm sorry if I lied. ”
"You're a liar!"
“Sorry, forgive me, Pershey. I-I can't bear to hide the truth from you anymore. I don't want to hurt you anymore, so I said— ”
“You’re lying! You are lying! ”
"No."
“You are lying! Get out of my face! Leave me alone! Leave me, liar! ”
I sprinted towards the bed and sat there while covering my face with my palms.
I almost silently sobbed while still sitting on the bed.
She's just lying, right? She's just lying and trying to fool me, right?
I continued to cry silently while I was in that position.
I don't understand why I feel so heavy. I couldn’t understand how it made me feel and why I couldn’t stop my tears from dripping.
T-they lied?
I felt her hand caress my arm. My tears flowed more and I seemed to dip my hands in the water.
“Please, I am begging you, forgive me, Pershey,” she said while caressing my arm.
"H-h-h-how?" I asked intermittently as my tears helped again. “T-t-tell me that you’re just lying, Bria. Y-y-you're just drunk and lying, right? ” And my chest seemed to be slowly breaking down.
I feel her again. She hugged me again while I was still in that position. I also felt her wet face when she came close to my back. I could hear her softly crying as she hugged me.
“They love you so much,” she said. "They just love you that's why they had to lie, Pershey," she continued.
"H-h-how ... could you say that?"
“F-forgive them, please? F-forgive them for lying. ”