After my chat with Alia, I immediately went to Haytham's room. I knocked on the door and then I found his voice allowing me to enter. He was busy taking care of his work, papers scattered on the table.
I walked closer and stopped right in front of his table, "I need to talk to you."
He looked up, his eyes staring at me tiredly as his hands clasping the paper. He froze in place when he found me who had come.
"Hey, what's the matter?" Instantly he put all the paper back. He stood up then walked over to me. His body stopped right beside me, leaning it against his desk, "Is your wound getting better? Don't forget to continue to treat it. I have put all your needs in your room."
"It's getting better, surely. Thanks." I paused, thinking for a moment then asking, "Are there any new problems with the Ainsleys?"
His eyes tapered, "How do you know?"
I let my hand ruffled my hair, "I asked for answers not questions back."
"He asked for a meeting with me, I promise, this time there will be no violence." He said, frustration in his voice.
"You don't know what he wants to talk about?" I asked again as I studied his bored face, curious about the answer.
"What else besides asking me to return you to his arms?" His voice had an annoyed edge.
He looked at me with an unreadable expression, "I can honestly say I feel jealous." He chuckled as if laughing at himself, "You don't have to worry." He quickly said again with his hands raised upwards, "I'll not be a barrier between you two."
Oh my God, it hurts more than I imagined. Slowly, I got closer to him, my hands stopped just as they touched his chest.
His eyes darted towards mine. From my hands to the tips of my feet trembled, felt his body was so tense. He drew closer to close our empty distance.
This was what I always dreamed of when I was with him. Moments like this, but it had never happened.
Why should it be now when my heart has moved to another heart?
"We can't do this." He told me when he realized how close we were.
"I want you so badly, I admit it. But, Janielle..." He looked away, "How can I kiss you when your face is no longer the face I used to see and love? Your current appearance is really like a stranger even though I know it's you." His voice sounded so serious yet so sad.
I froze when he took my hands off his chest, "How can I stroke your cheeks, stroke your hair when with you I just think that the woman in front of me is not the one I used to love."
I could explain nothing to the sadness he felt as he said those words.
"You're Jazzlin. People will continue to know you as her. Your life should be for her fully, and now there'll only be one man in your life, and it's not me, but Barra in your heart."
"Is this goodbye for us?" The question came out of my mind by itself.
Pain seemed shot through him as he bit his lower lip.
"Isn't that right?" I asked in quivering voice. It felt like a painful prick at my heart when it was my own guess.
He sighed, gazing at me, "It doesn't matter. What you need to know is the fact that I will be by your side whenever you need me."
I snorted a laugh, "It sounds cruel like I'm using you, you know."
"By that I never feel like you use me. You never did it anyways." He smiled dryly.
I had nothing else to say but nod. He was no longer looking at me, his eyes were busy staring at the papers that were still there.
Doesn't he know I'm more important than those papers?
"Alia overheard your conversation regarding this."
He returned to me, letting his eyes catch the curiosity in my eyes.
"I already knew that's why I changed the word meeting into an event so that she didn't think anything's wrong."
"Good choice of words, but I was fooled too." I rolled my eyes then turned my body to leave the room, "I'll see you later." He shouted as I closed the door.
What path would Haytham take from his meeting with Barra? Would he let me go back to Barra or stick to his previous plan?
My steps stopped to find Alia staring out the window, "What are you looking at?" I asked then joined her.
"Look at those three cars." Three sedans that I knew very well was in front of the Sanders's mansion. Gosh, Ronald and Jake were here.
"Do you know who they are? I used to monitor the cars coming from here." The explanation was enough to make me understand, so far every time there was a business related to Haytham, she often saw or even knew it.
"They're good people. I knew them when I lived with Barra." Saying it to Alia sounded unfamiliar, but the words had already come out.
"You love that man so much." My cheeks flushed at her statement.
"Haytham has told me about the truth about you." She lowered her head and closed the curtains. I followed her as she stopped her steps near the sofa and sat back in relax position.
"The truth? Which one?" God knows why I even gave her such a strange question as if I kept a lot of secrets from her.
"Your spirit is mixed with Janielle? Actually, you're Janielle, right? I was thinking about where Jazzlin's spirit is." She showed me her narrowing eyes.
"Me too." I shrugged, "That's what I'm thinking about all time."
"Hmm, this is a big conspiracy." She smiled for a moment her eyes saw me full of joyous, "I miss you so much." She hugged me tightly.
I hugged her back, "When did Haytham tell you about this? Since I woke up, you haven't mentioned me in the least about this."
"Since knowing you, I had suspected something was wrong with you. You always reminded me of Janielle. Until finally, Haytham told me everything." Her voice shranked for a moment she put her face to the right side of my neck, "I wanted to say but I did not believe what he said before, until I watched your every move."
I rubbed her shoulder and leaned my head on her shoulder, "Then now do you believe him?"
"Really really believe, won't you be in Jazzlin's body for long?"
The question never crossed my mind. I never thought there would be a possibility for myself to be separated from this body.
"I don't know." I replied in an ordinary tone.
"You guys are here, huh." Haytham walked over to us and sat down together.
We let go of our hugs then simultaneously stared at him.
"I'm glad to be with you guys again." Alia gratefully said that, making Haytham and I sent her a deep lovely smile.
I chuckled, "Oh yeah, Ronald and Jake are here." Hearing my info, Haytham nodded then stood up.
"You guys just wait here, it will only take a moment." Then he walked quickly into the hall.
After I found Haytham far from my sight, I again said to Alia, "I need to know about this, you wait here for a moment and ..."
She cut me off, "I won't tell him." I hadn't even said it yet but she knew where my words about to go next.
"Thank you." With that I ran after him.
"You really like eavesdropping, don't you?" His words brought me back to the memory of the first time I saw him with Mr. Salvatore.
I looked back and saw Haytham stomping his feet in rhythm to see my face which must had been like a fool when got caught.
Full of frustration I said, "I need to know."
His eyes did not meet mine other than staring down, "He is very important to you."
Realizing who he meant, I fell silent. Everything that had to do with Barra, must be my top priority. I just needed to know about his information after being away for these past days.
"If they saw you, there would be two possibilities. First, they would take you by force or they would make an instant attack towards me." He walked over to me, "And I won't let that happen."
I irritably sighed, "Well, how about I hide? They won't see me but I can still hear your conversation, agree?"
He still shook his head, disagree.
"I promise I will freeze and not make a sound." I said with hope and a tone that sounded pleading.
"I can't let you take this risk." He started walking away from me.
"They won't hurt me! They're my friends."
"This conversation is over. I have no time left." He walked faster as I tried to reach the hem of his suit.
"No, please. I really want to hear that. Please please please!"
"No means no." He insisted. I knew actually he was considering my request, it only took a little time for him to allow me.
"Janielle, if you keep following me, how can I meet them?" He finally stopped and looked at me. As soon as possible I showed a sad face like a child who lost her way, aka stray.