Samantha's POV
I woke up from the loud voices outside my room.
My eyes shot open and saw how the darkness have enveloped the surroundings. It it's already dark.
I checked my phone and realized that I had been knocked out for more than five hours, it's almost midnight.
I checked the messages on my phone. Two messages from my brother asking if I'm okay or if I'm hungry.
Another from my mom reminding me to be more careful and to message her every time I needed her.
Seeing her name on my phone suddenly made me miss my mom so much.
Another message from one of my friends abroad, Chaeng, asking me when I would be visiting her and Lisa.
My heart broke into pieces when I realized that there's not a single message or missed call from him.
My right arm covered my eyes while my body lay lazily on my bed. The silence deafening my ears.
My heart feels heavy and my mind is in a wreck.
I'm not even sure if everything is still fine, if we're still fine.
I don't even know I feel. I just know that I'm sad and my inside is in pain. I feel like my heart is sore and weak, and I'm afraid it might shatter any minute.
Is this what heartbreak feels like? I haven't even been dumped but why does it feels like I was?
Why is he making me feel this way?
I want to fight for him. I know that his feelings for me is true.
"Where are you?" I asked myself. I just hope he's safe and everything is fine.
My body flew out of my bed when I heard the commotion outside. I quickly get out of my bed and went out only to be greeted by my brother and Josh on top of each other while the rest are trying to break them off.
Josh's face is covered with bruise.
My hands covered my mouth. "Oh God."
"What are you two doing?" I shout as I run towards them but they seemed to be oblivious to what I said.
Once I reached them, I tried to pull Josh away but he accidentally shoved his left arm to me which made me flew a few feet away from them, my back hitting the corner of the table. I winch in pain.
"Ughhh." I groan as I felt the pain at the back of my body.
They must have realized what happened as everybody stopped and looked at me.
"Noona..."
"Fu-Samantha!"
The fierce expression on my brother's eyes were covered with concern. He released his hands from Josh's collar and ran to me, Haiden followed.
"Are you okay?" he asked me as he help me get back on my feet.
I just nodded in response instead of answering, afraid that my voice might betray me. It was so painful, I'm sure my back was bleeding.
My eyes wandered to Josh, the expression on his face I couldn't read. I'm sure I saw the concerned look on his eyes when he accidentally pushed me earlier.
My heart ached when I saw all the bruises on his handsome face.
What happened to him?
I slowly stood up and made my way to Josh who refused to look at me.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?" I ask in concern.
I don't care if my back is bleeding. My hands automatically lifted to touch his face but as soon at my hands made its contact, he moves a little. To my dismay, he moved farther, away from me.
"Oppa.." I whispered, a little hurt by his action. I put down my arms while silence filled the room.
"Yah, Josh hyung!" I heard Vash said.
I looked down, afraid to meet the cold gaze that is visible on his eyes.
You won't give up like this, Samantha. I said to myself as my left hand wipe the tears on my cheeks, I didn't even notice is already flowing.
Right. I've been waiting for him for ages. She can't back down now.
"I guess you're tired right?" I told him as I try to show a smile on my face. "Do you want me to accompany you to your room?" I said as I try to move closer to him, not minding the tension filling up the room.
For a moment, I'm sure his face softens a little like how he normally is, but it was just a split-second I'm not even sure if I saw it right.
He pushed the Yohan's and Rome's hands away from him before he looks at me straight into my eyes.
"Let's break up." he said, his voice so firm I was afraid he really meant what he said.
I felt my heart get twisted. My heart about to burst.
But I won't just back down.
I won't give him up that easily. I'm not Jeon Jake's noona for nothing. Of course, his competitiveness runs in the family.
"I don't want to." I said to him with conviction. I gathered all the strength that I have to look back to him straight into his eyes.
"I don't want to break up because I know you love me. And I won't leave you now because I now you need me."
"That's the problem..." he said. " I don't."
If they can only hear my heart breaking.
"I don't love you. And I don't need you. So let's break up, please..."
I felt my heart twisted from the inside.
Fuck, this hurts so bad.
I saw my brother from the corner of my eyes as he almost lunged back to Josh. "Fuck you, bastard." but I pulled his arms to stop him.
"Don't. Please..."
No matter how hurt I am, I still don't want him to get hurt, especially not because of me.
I looked into his eyes. "Is this really want you want?" I asked still wishing he'd take back what he said.
Please take it back, please...
"Yes. Please. I don't want to see you." then he moves past from Jason and Vash.
After he get passed me, I pulled his left arm, so strong, I swear his body stiffen a little.
Again, my heart ache just thinking about it. Is this how much he hates me now. To the point that his body gets stiffen by our mere contact?
"If we break up now, I'll leave...away from you, away from everybody else..." I told him. "And I won't be coming back. I won't go back.... at least not for you, not to you..."
This is my last chance. This is the last thing I could do. If he really wants me to leave, I will.
I will of that's what will makes him happy.
He did not answer. Instead, he brushed my hands off from his, too strong, I had to get my balance. Then he continued walking away.
Away from me...
Away from us...
"Josh Oppa....please..." I called his name one last time but he still left, leaving my heart shattered into pieces.
"Yah, Josh hyung!!" I heard the boys call.
Once he's gone, I felt my knees weaken as I dropped myself from the floor. My tears now streaming down my face. Everybody moved closer to where I am while my brother hugged me.
I don't care if I look a mess right now.
He left me. He said he don't want to see me.
I looked into my brother, "I want to go home, please." I told him and he understood. I didn't object when he carried me up bridal style.
I don't have the strength to move anyways.
I lost him. I freaking lost Kim Josh... forever.