Breathe, Tessa. Just breathe! I mentally murmur to myself for the fifth time.
Calming myself down doesn't seem to work no matter how much I try, but there is no choice for me either.
We are seated in front of these opulent affluent men in the boardroom. Their eyes are blinking at us like we are aliens as Jerol prepares to inaugurate the meeting. I can tell they are afraid of their boss, but they are angry as much and more confused with my presence too.
"Greetings, gentlemen!" Jerol's voice echoes in the room, summoning everyone's attention.
A faint chorus echoes in the room in response to his greetings.
"First, I would like to introduce to you all my wife, Mrs O'Brian McCall!" Jerol says, interlocking our fingers together under the table.
That calms me down a bit, and I stress on his hand, acknowledging how much I appreciate this gesture.
I flash a glance around, voyaging my smile around all the individuals in this room, finally resting on my husband. He trades a small genuine smile with mine, embarking on the main agenda. This wasn't part of today's agenda. It shouldn't have.
"Thank you all for coming. I would like to begin by apologizing to you for how the company's problems have impacted you. I'm also sorry for leaving the huge burden which I was responsible for in your hands. I'm here to correct my mistakes and make it up to you all, and to revive the company that means a lot to us all here." He casts a glance at everyone.
After being satisfied with their stringent attention on him, he resumes his speech.
An hour goes down, and they are still discussing the way forward for the company, while I pretend to blend. Big lie. Jerol has offered to pay off the losses that the company has incurred for the last three months. A show of accountability, and ratifying his mistake. An accountable leader - Bingo!
I am also moved because he has handled himself well despite the discussion getting heated at some point. He hasn't lost his cool even once, and that means he is on the right track. Perhaps better than he or I knows. Bravo!
"Having come to an agreement, I would also like to point one thing out. I have the records of everyone in this company. I also know that some of you were responsible for the losses. If you know you stole even a cent from my company, don't wait for me to reach out. You won't like it. My office will be open for the next couple of hours and if you don't come to explain yourself before the office closes, you will be sorry. Thank you!" He closes his laptop ready to leave, but an old man speaks, disturbing Jerol's cool.
"This was exclusively a board's meeting, Jerol. What was the need of bringing your wife here? She isn't part of the board."
Correct! I knew someone would worry about my presence, but I didn't expect Jerol to be this calm even after being questioned.
"She has all the rights because I made her part of the board!" Jerol responds calmly.
What? My stomach formed countless knots after his words.
"What do you mean?" The same man implores again.
The aged fella seems to be the bold one to speak.
"I transferred some of my shares to her. From now on, she will be part of the board."
Simple. Clear. But confusing!
How is this part of the agreement? How necessary was it? Making me part of his company?
While contemplating the possible meaning of this, I'm being pulled out of the room by Jerol. I'm too dumbfounded to even match his slow pace, or ask anything until we get to his office.
As he perches himself down on his swivel chair beside the shining mahogany desk, I dumbfoundedly rack before him on the opposite side. Why did he do that? Doesn't he realize that this is already too confounded? And he has made it worse with this.
"Why?" I implore after noticing his baffled gaze on my thunderstruck face.
"Why...what?" He implores with a flat expression.
Like nothing happened. Like he hasn't made his contracted wife a part of him by transferring his shares to her.
"You know what I am talking about, Jerol! Or did you make that up?" I ask, my heart thumping in my chest.
He pulls an envelope from his drawer, handing it to me. I refute accepting it. The last time he handed me an envelope, it embodied the shock of my life. I am afraid this might be another shock.
He rests the envelope on the table after I fail to take it, and he jerks up from the seat and strolls to me.
"I didn't make anything up, Tessa. I knew that you being in the meeting would arouse questions. This was the only justification I could think of." He explains as he towers before me, taking my hands into his, standing more closer than I would have preferred.
"I could have just stayed in this office. You didn't need me there. You were fine. You handled yourself pretty well." I state, hoping he realizes that this was totally unnecessary.
"That's because you were there. I held onto your arm the whole time because I needed to feel your presence with me. I don't trust myself. I needed you there, Tessa. I need you." The last part came out barely a whisper, but it echoes with a bang in my ears.
Why is he sounding so intense? Why are his words making my heart thumb like this? Why are his words sinking into my bones like this?
"Jerol..." I whimper, but he cuts me off.
"Don't say anything, please." He closes his eyes, inhaling a good amount of air and releasing it in small quantities.
Maybe he is also feeling the connection developing between us? The sense of deja vu is also impacting on him?
Connection, huh?! Slow down, Tessa Angeline. Rule number one, no falling in love. He made that rule. There is no way he would break it. And you agreed to the terms, you are not stupid enough to break them. I swallow hard!
"How much is it?" I ask, and he fixes his bottomless orbs on mine.
"Twenty-five percent!" He says.
My hands slip from his hold. I forget to breathe for a moment. Staring at him seems the only thing I can manage to do, perusing the layers of his deep pools one by one, hoping that he understands how deep this ship we are sailing on is sinking.
We have close to only a month before the contract expires. Things should be getting lighter and easier, but on the contrary, everything is complicating everything. We are complicating everything, and I am afraid that it's too late to get things back on track. Can we stop this? Can I stop myself from feeling like this?
And him - I thought all along it was his brains playing games with him. That he was not okay. That's why he kissed me so passionately the way he did and flirted with me the way he did. I thought it was his way of forgetting her. Getting that bitch out of his system. Why does he seem to be sinking in with me now that he has almost recouped?
What's the meaning of this? Is this exactly what I see it or am I getting the wrong ideas?