My old ways.
~Vincenzo~
"Can't I just cut off my legs?" she said as I watched her do the exercises she had to do.
"No."
She stopped what she was doing and I think it hurt her since I saw pain when she was trying to do them. "they're already ugly, messed up, and weak. Might as well have them gone so I won't have to deal with looking at the weakness and the scars." She whispered. Her hair fell like a curtain around her face as a hand went up to her face.
I quickly pushed off the wall and took three big strides towards her, and quickly went on my knee and kneeled right in front of her, which she was sitting on a chair. One of my hand rested on her thigh while the other pushed away and tucked her hair behind her ears. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she had her eyes closed. "Have them gone since I don't have to be reminded what he've done to me." she hiccupped. Her shoulders shook as her face held pain.
My hand gave her slight squeeze and her eyes open in a glossy coat, "Don't ever think off of him. He's gone-" She pushed away my hand.
"He may be gone to you, but not me! He's in my god damn head! I can't look at these scars without thinking about the pain he has caused me. I can't." Her eyes flooded with tears and she couldn't stop them as she blinked. My face remained in the stone cold look as I bit my tongue from saying something that might cause her to cry in pain.
My hand went up and whipped away the tear that fell from her cheek and then followed to her hand that was covering her mouth from letting the sob escape. My hand held her soft hand in mine with a strong grip, letting her know that her hand is safe in mine. I then stood up and held her hand above her head. She stared up at me as her lips were trying to swallow back the sob that was trying to force its way out.
"Let me show you that he's not here to hurt you. Physically and mentally."
******
I walked her down the steps and down to the door that held the room. Her hand began to sweat in mine, but I continued up and opened up the door. I flicked on the light switch and walked us in. I let go of her hand when both of us were in the room and then I went to close the door. She looked around but I walked to the wooden chair that was stained with blood.
My victims to be exact.
It sat right in the middle, right under the light. I turned around and looked towards her. Her face was still freshly tinted red from crying as her nose was red. Her eyes were puffy slightly and her hair was pulled up in a loose ponytail.
"You should never fear a man like Vlad. Sure, he hurt you, he caused you to have nightmares. Have you want to give up everything that reminded you of him. He was a man that would weave his laugh and his image in your thoughts. He was a man that wanted to be a nightmare, have you fear him, Mai. But he should never be the one you fear of. Right beside me is where I pulled out his beating heart of his chest and held his heart as it gave its last pumps as it died down." My tone was dark as I spoke about this man. This man that hurt her.
Her eyes went to the side of me and looked at the chair and then they slowly looked towards my hands. " He shouldn't be the one to have your fears Mai, it should be me- and I know you said it before that you were afraid of me, but you don't really know what kind of man-no-demon I am. You may have an idea of what I can do, but I can guarantee that it's not even close."
She stared at me with the expression of confusion and somewhat scared look. If I wasn't in love with her, I would've loved that look of fear written on her face.
But now it hurts me that if I think she fears me, but I need to deal with it because she is going to fear me afterward. So I placed on that same smile I had when I was talking to Vlad, "Mai, before you were brought in my life, I would easily go down the street and pick a random person and would easily kill them just for the fucks of it. I was driven and craving the feeling of blood in my hand, splattering on my face if I choose if they would get the easy way out. The cops avoided me, they wouldn't acknowledge me when they found out it was me that killed another person." I walked around the chair as I traced the blood stains on the chair.
"I was so addicted in killing, I even killed my men!" I laughed. "I was so close in losing my men just because of what I needed to feel." My hand gripped the chair, "I sometimes thought I went insane, I lost sanity. Clearly, I did if I couldn't control why I needed to kill. But when I saw you walk into that alley-" I looked up to her and I saw her mouth somewhat open. "I wanted to have your life in my hands before I started to pull your strings before you came undone in my hands, and then slowly you'll be dismantled in my hands. I wanted to become your worst nightmare. I wanted to become some type of living nightmare in your eyes...but fate can be a fuckin bitch." I said as my smile grew and as my hand tightened on the chair.
"And I knew I was scaring you in the beginning but I think I was scaring myself." My smile began to fall. " I think I was scaring myself at how I felt when Vlad hurt you. I never felt that way and I thought, 'oh, well maybe this is how it feels for trying to become a nightmare for a woman.' but I was wrong." I looked back at the chair and stared at the blood. "Yeah, I didn't know how to love. I thought love was to fuck and say you're mine, but no. When you were starting to get hurt, it hurt me. Not because I wasn't the one that caused you pain, it was someone else doing the torture. I hated it." My jaw clenched.
"My addiction was slowly changing. I didn't want to kill as often. My addiction was you." I looked up once more, "my addiction was starting to become a priority. A priority in protecting you. I can be a demon to anyone that wanted to hurt you, and I did. When Vlad was in my hands, that's when the old me came back, Mai."
"I killed him the way my demon fed off of. I wanted his blood to run cold in my hands. I wanted to have him be scared of me as he knew that I was the last thing he was going to see before he died. My old me came back...and I sure did miss it." A smirk came upon my face.
"I swear I'll protect you and love you as long as I can, but I'm going to be back in my dark ways. I'm not saying to be afraid of me, I don't want that, but I know if you found out what I'll be doing, I know you'll be afraid Mai. And I'm sorry in advance, but you fell in the hands of a monster, and I don't think you'll be going anywhere for awhile." I pushed away from the chair and strode towards her as her eyes grew big. I knew my face looked sinister in her eyes, but... oh well.
I pulled her hard and close to my body and claimed what's mine.
I'm back.