Maxine's POV
Everything went downhill after that day. I was still fixing my broken heart knowing it'll be too slow because the only cure of this was the one who broke it but never mind. She doesn't care about me anyway.
I barely feel anything. I guess I became numb already. I miss her so bad that my knuckles have been bruised because every time I think about her, I just punched the wall hoping the pain will just be physical because emotional pain was just too much for me to handle. But the stinging pain she left had worsen every single day.
I promise to stay away from her but every time I looked at her, I could feel the sudden pull of gravity towards her which I fought every day. As painful as it is, she may be right. We cannot be sure of what the future holds but why the hell am I seeing my future with her!? I constantly checked her social media accounts for updates, I also watched her subtly when in class and at lunch, she seemed to eat less and she became busy with her other friends as well, I'm still glad that she has friends to make her happy.
Was she happy I gave her what she wants? Is this what she really wants? if so, why do I see in her eyes the sadness and the longingness? But what she said was final. How is she? I know she's home by now. I know because I asked for updates with Mark and sometimes, I request Annie to check on her.
I miss her.
I miss every bit of her. My train of thoughts was interrupted by the alarm. It's 12 midnight already that means, it’s the 25th of December. I was awake till this time waiting for her text that maybe, just maybe she would care or she would remember that 24th of December was my birthday.
*flashback*
"We could go picnic on the 24th, there's this beautiful fall i want to take you before we go home for holidays." Celine said while she nuzzles her head on my neck. I inhale her scent and kissed her forehead which makes her giggle. "But that means we'll have short time since we should go home by afternoon on the 24th." "Then we can do it 12 midnight until 4 in the afternoon of the 24th. " she replied "What'll we do at 12 midnight in this so-called falls?" I asked her, I can’t keep smiling because of how silly her ideas were "I'll make you fall in love with me and scream my name as loud as you can" she said as she kissed my neck earning a moan from me. she giggled and climb on top of me. "You know you can make it anytime" I said teasingly
"Oh really?" She asked evilly as without a cue she pinched my side and tickled me. I was shocked and I almost choke with my laughter. "S..stop.. Bab..y" I pleaded still holding on my laughter and trying to waved off her hands "No! No. No." She tickled me once again this time grabbing me by my neck to may nape since she knew that that was the most ticklish part of my body. I jolted by her actions and we both fell off the bed laughing our hearts out. "I want to be your day to be special babe. And I want to be with you all day, okay?" she giggled once again, kissing me on my nose and my forehead.
She was so sweet. I kissed her one more time and we both looked into each other’s eyes, feeling each other's soul and letting our heart beat as one.
*end of flashback*
Guess that would just be a plan out of nothing. I was looking forward to this day since I met her, imagining what day would it had been if we were okay. Will she take me to that falls and make me fall in love with our current situation? Will she make love to me until we scream each other's name as loud as we could? Probably not. She doesn’t want me anymore. And that thought gave me another heartache, an unbearable one that make you want to cry and shout at the top of your lungs that it hurt so much.
It fuckng hurt that the person you had plans together will just remain they’re at that moment, leaving you shattered and dismissed all the plans you two had made.
Does she even remember? Is she asleep right now??
Is she thinking of me too? Will she come back to me and take away all the things she said? will she stay with me and fight for the both of us until we get old?
Will she hold my hand once again and never let go? There were questions I couldn’t ask her and I couldn't have answers.
I quickly sent her a holiday greeting and wishing her to have a nice holiday. "Happy Birthday" I whispered to myself sighing, checking my phone once again for any message but was disappointed to found nothing.
With a heavy heart, I wish everything to be on its rhythm once again and drifted off to sleep.