Rudrani:
In the night, after the dinner I slept keeping head on his chest and talking to my Ashu. Ashu behaved normally with me though I can notice a kind of disappointment and hurt in his tone. I always want to keep Ashu happy but everytime I am just testing his patience by pushing his limits of loving me.
"I am really sorry," I said slowly.
"Leave it," Ashu said, caressing my hairs. Ashu kissed my head taking me closer to him.
"I am trying hard to be a good wife to you but situations are failing me to do so. I know I have done many mistakes after our marriage and hurt you many times but still every time you dealt me and my mistakes with patience, maturity and love. But even now though you did a lot for me I gave only pain to you," I said crying.
"Stop crying, my love. That's okay. Marriage is not all about sex. I have the maturity to understand that," Ashu said.
"It's not about maturity or understanding. It's about your needs and expectations," I said.
"Sleep now!" Ashu said.
"Ashu, I...." I tried to say.
"I am feeling sleepy. Goodnight my love," Ashu said and kissed my forehead.
In the morning, Ashu woke up before me and got ready.
"Rudrani, I have some work. I will come directly to the college," Ashu said.
"Should I go alone to the college?" I asked pouting and hugging Ashu.
"You can do everything alone. Of course, you are enough matured and strong to live your life alone. I don't think you need me," Ashu said.
I broke the hug and looked at Ashu as I got shocked to his words.
"Why are you talking like that, Ashu?" I said.
"Come on, Rudrani. I just said it casually. I am leaving, take care, my love," Ashu said, kissing my forehead.
I stared at Ashu while he left the house. I don't know why but his words hurt me. I got ready slowly and went to the college. I found Ashu talking to a girl in the class and that girl sat beside him in my place. I went there.
"Can you please shift to other place? I used to sit here everyday," I said to her.
"May be but I sat here today. Why should I shift the seat for you? Why can't you choose some other place to settle?" That girl said.
"Look, he is my husband and I like to sit beside him. Get out from here right now," I said due to my insecurity. I tried to pull her hand to make her go away from my Ashu.
"Rudrani, stop it. Do you understand what are you talking and doing? It's a college. Behave yourself. Go and sit somewhere else without creating any nuisance," Ashu said seriously.
"Ashu, please...." I said.
"Go now!" Ashu said glaring at me.
I went and sat somewhere else. In the afternoon, I tried to talk to Ashu but he ignored me.
"I am sorry," I said.
"Why did you behave like that, Rudrani? What would they think of you? You are too childish at times," Ashu said.
"I am sorry," I said.
Ashu smiled and came near to me. He raised my head and wiped off my tears.
"Do you think I will get close to another girl just because you said no to me yesterday?" Ashu asked me. I didn't speak anything and hugged him tightly with tears.
"Sweetheart, stop crying. In the morning I went to collect the proofs to prove your innocence in that pub incident. I am not angry with you. Rudrani, do you think your husband is such a person who leaves you just because of your no?" Ashu asked hugging me.
"I don't want to miss you and your love," I said.
"If I talk to a girl or allows a girl to sit beside me, it doesn't mean she will replace you in my life or I will love her. You are the only one who have place in my heart and life. Don't think much about the issue that happened yesterday. We have lot of time to start our married life. We will do it only when you are comfortable with it. Don't assume that I will leave you for that. Be cool and focus on your study," Ashu said and I nodded.
"Come, let's have our lunch together," Ashu said.
I had lunch with Ashu. I never understand how could Ashu be this patient and loving towards me. We had the lunch and then went to the class. I focused on the class happily without thinking anything else. In the evening, we went to our house and Ashu started preparing the dinner asusual.
I observed him for sometime without his notice. I don't know why but I felt some unknown feeling in my heart remembering his love for me until now. I went to the kitchen and hugged him from the behind. Ashu stumbled and then held my hands to kiss them.
"What happened to you, my love?" Ashu asked stirring the curry.
I shook my head indicating nothing.
I decided to start a new life with my Ashu. Yes, I need to do it. Not for Ashu or his needs, but for our love and to make the bond between us stronger. The next day, I stayed at home saying that I need a rest.
By the time Ashu arrives, I made everything ready for our first night. I decided to surprise him. I decorated the room and prepared his favourite sweets. I am excited to become Ashu's wife in all means. I got ready in his favourite coloured saree. I heard the bell of the door. I took a deep breathe to control my emotions and a feel that makes me go crazy.
I opened the door and Ashu seemed so tired and dull. Ashu looked at me once and then he settled on the sofa.
"Are you fine, Ashu?" I asked as he didn't notice any difference in me.
"Not really. Please get me a coffee. I can't bear this headache," Ashu said.
I nodded and gave the coffee to him and then massaged his head for sometime with pain relieving oil. He leaned backwards and slept on the sofa while massaging his forehead.
I kissed on his forehead and prepared a lite dinner for us as Ashu is unwell. After sometime I went to call him for the dinner. Ashu didn't respond making me worried. I touched his forehead and realised that he has fever.
"Ashu, please open your eyes," I said and gave a tablet to him.
I took him to the room and Ashu looked at the decoration.
"Rudrani, actually...."
"Ashu, you need rest," I said and cleaned the bed making him sit on a couch. I made him sleep on the bed and changed his dress to comfortable wear. Ashu slept immediately as he is too tired and sick. For the whole night, I sat beside him checking his temperature and putting wet wipes on his forehead to reduce the temperature.
I didn't like Ashu sleeping that way silently. Fear occupied my heart. I know it's just a fever but even though I felt restless. In the morning, Ashu opened his eyes. I checked his temperature and it's normal. I got relaxed. For a week, Ashu was on the bed due to weakness and body pains.
He recovered after a week. I gave him soup and sat beside him.
"I am sorry, my love," Ashu said.
"What?" I asked him.
"I am sorry for disappointing you on that day with my fever," Ashu said.
"No, Ashu. We can do it anytime. That's not important, you are important to me. Don't think much. Have the soup and take rest," I said.
"I understood very well that desires and need is not everything. After all not more than the one whom we love the most. I shouldn't have showed my anger at you that day," Ashu said.
"That's okay, Ashu. Because you have already given a long time to me to come out of my past and start a new life with you," I said.
"I love you. I will never force you again until we complete our Masters. Let's reach our goal first," Ashu said, giving me a side hug.
The time passed by quickly with study and practicals. We completed the Masters and I secured a medal for being the top scorer in the University. Ashu stood second but he doesn't feel anything bad. Asusual Ashu felt happy with my tremendous success. Finally we returned India to start a new phase of life as cardio thoracic surgeons. We are waiting to explore the world of health care and serve patients.