She couldn’t remember how she got back to her dorm.
Silje went into her bedroom and stared at the white wall.
Kail was back.
She knew this day would come, but when it really did happen, the shock of it was too much. The worst thing was the painful memories. She buried them deep inside her, but now they were back. Silje felt like she could hear the Solveig’s song faintly.
…Her brain was not working. She couldn’t think clearly.
“This is a special patient. She has agreed to this procedure, so we need to hurry up and do it right now.”
She remembered that day five years ago in the hospital.
The feel of the cold medical instruments on her skin.
She could never forget. She would never forget. Lying on the hospital bed, Silje was treated like a piece of meat. No one there saw her as a human being. Her body was assaulted, and her helpless baby was murdered.
And it was all plotted by Kail’s stepmother. She did it because she hated her stepson.
Silje could still hear her voice.
“The Bruntland family can never have a mixed-race baby. Never.”
She couldn’t forget that day. She couldn’t forget what the Bruntland family did to her.
When they took out the precious life from her body, they killed her soul as well. Silje didn’t tell Kail about it because she just didn’t want to be associated with him anymore. It was selfish of her, but she wasn’t in her right mind. Silje couldn’t stay in Norway anymore; she wanted to leave everything and everyone immediately at the time.
That was why she agreed to come to New York.
And she fought for her new life. She fought tooth and nail, and finally, she got this far.
She didn’t want to get involved with Kail again. She had enough of him and Norway. If she could, she wanted to never hear the name Bruntland ever again.
It had been a long time since Silje left Norway, but her feelings hadn’t changed.
There was a time when she was seduced by him. She was in love with him, and she would’ve followed him anywhere.
But no more.
The bloody love they shared together… The faith and trust they had in each other…
She wanted to deny them all.
She refused to fall into his trap again.
Silje had to make sure she didn’t get dragged back to his world. She didn’t want to lose herself again. Like Kail said, they were destructive for each other.
Once was enough. She didn’t want it anymore. She didn’t want to even think about their times together. Her eyes became cold as she considered her options.
Even if she told him the truth about what happened, about his cruel stepmother, nothing would change. Would killing Ingrid make things better?
No.
Besides, Silje was done with Kail. She didn’t want him anymore.
Sitting on her cold bed and staring at the white wall, Silje suddenly smiled bitterly.
Her innocent baby was dead, so nothing could make it better. Nothing mattered.
So Silje decided to not tell Kail anything about what happened to her. And she was going to accept whatever punishment he gave her. That was the least she could do for him.
There were times when she was his, but she lost their innocent baby. She also abandoned him, so Silje decided that it was only fair that he got what he wanted this time. He had the right.
“…Kail.”
She whispered his name quietly.
Silje truly hoped that she would never see him again, but it was too late now. Ironically, even after all this time, his presence overwhelmed her more than ever. Just standing near him was enough to make her tremble and he knew it.
Silje remembered his changed appearance.
What happened to him after she left Oslo?
Kail might be the only son and heir to the family, but knowing what kind of woman Ingrid was, and what kind of family the Bruntlands were, Silje could vaguely guess. One thing was certain: the main reason for the devastating change in him was her.
His eyes looked empty and when she remembered them, Silje shivered again.
Those eyes…
But she was ready. She wasn’t going to run away anymore.
Silje knew she couldn’t avoid him forever and what she did to him was unforgivable. She left him without any explanation, so she agreed with Kail that she owed him a debt. She needed to take care of this, even if it could destroy her.
What was Kail thinking? What was he going to do to her?
Could it be that he thought he could start over again with her?
Remembering his kiss again, Silje trembled and closed her eyes. She knew that this winter in New York was going to be the coldest winter of her life.
***
The New York Metropolitan Museum.
Silje couldn’t tell why he wanted to meet her here. She smiled bitterly as she remembered when two days ago, a large flower basket appeared for her at her agency.
Pink roses.
Even Klare seemed surprised.
“Pink roses mean love oath, right? Silje, you reached the top fifteen on models.com, and so you must have a crazy fan now. I can tell that this is an expensive flower basket made by a boutique florist.”
Klare was nosy, and before she could stop him, he peaked at the card in the basket. Yet as soon as he looked at it, he frowned and shook his head. He handed the card to Silje and asked, “What the! It’s not in English. What is it? It looks like Norwegian? Bokmal?”
Klare was good. Indeed, Kail hand wrote the words in Norwegian so that no one could read it except her.
Love oath? No, these roses meant his revenge. His insane obsession for her.
Silje trembled again as she stared at the flowers.
While everyone exclaimed over the basket, Silje calmly told them it was from an acquaintance and left it at the agency.
“Silje, aren’t you going to take the flowers with you?”
When Klare asked, Silje replied coldly, “No. Throw it away.”
To be honest, she didn’t want to meet Kail just yet. Seeing the flowers he sent only made her upset.
She walked away and when she got into the elevator, she murmured to herself.
“So sending the flowers right to my agency… I guess it must be a warning that he knows where I work and live.”
And the message on the card…
It was short and simple, but the writing looked like it came from a fit of controlled anger.
– This weekend. Metropolitan Museum. 3 PM.
Totem.
And he wrote “Totem.”
Totem…
She tried to remain calm, but she was about to explode.
Did he think they still had a special connection between them?
It is true that what they had together in Oslo was indeed distinct. They were as close as two people could be, but did Kail think they still had that connection?
If he did, he was very much mistaken. They were two very different people now and they were meant to lead separate lives.
They couldn’t be together, and he needed to realize this.