A small smile escaped my lips as I grabbed a forkful and lifted it on his lips. He silently opened his mouth and took the food.
I watched him as he chewed on his food. I would never not be amazed by his face and the little moves he makes.
The way his jaw moves when he eats. The way his lips pursed. The way his eyes flickered.
"Are you watching me, Charity?" He flicked his eyes at me as he swallowed on his food.
I felt like a mouse caught in the cheese trap. My neck started to heat up as he cocked his head to my direction, making our eyes meet.
I was sure that if he could see me right now, my whole face would be as red as tomatoes.
"I just… uh… you have a sauce on your lips."
Before he could react, I already wiped the sauce on the corner of his lips using my thumb. Xander slightly frowned.
"What was that?"
"Huh? I told you, you have something on your lips."
"You didn't use a napkin?"
My lips parted. "W-well, we're married anyway." I cleared my throat.
He cocked his brow. But then he didn't say anything. He just licked his lips that made me almost drop the fork I was holding.
Damn.
"Did Berna cook this bolognese?" Xander asked. "Or did you order it somewhere?"
I pursed my lips. "I cooked this."
I remembered when I gave him pasta bolognese.
"Really?" I saw how his eyebrow moved.
"Do you think I don't know how to cook?"
He cleared his throat. "I just didn't expect you to cook."
"Well, I have nothing else to do aside from taking care of you." I shrugged. "Do you like it?" I asked, taking another forkful of pasta and handing it to him. I watched him as took the food to his mouth. His face remained serious. I couldn't read if he found my dish tasty or not.
"It tastes fine," he said after drinking the glass of water in front of him.
"Really?" I asked, pursing my lips to prevent myself from smiling. I should be offended but instead I found him cute.
I didn't know if his taste buds changed because of the accident or if he was just lying to me. "But you said you liked this before," I couldn't help but say.
I noticed how his ears reddened. What's wrong? Was he really lying to me? "Really?" He cleared his throat. "You cooked for me before?"
"Yeah." I remembered the time I brought him my pasta bolognese. "We weren't still together back then," I told him. "I had an, uh… emergency, you helped me by lending me your coat. The next day, I decided to bring you a pasta bolognese to thank you."
"What kind of emergency was that?" he quipped.
I bit my lip, my neck heating up. "Just uh… a girl thing emergency."
"Oh." He nodded in understanding.
I placed my hand at the back of my neck. "Yup. Come on, you should eat more."
"Seriously, you should eat, too," he said after feeding him.
I smiled. "I'll eat after you."
He picked up the glass of water. "I'm done."
"Come on, just one more."
He raised his brow at me. "You're stubborn, aren't you?"
"Well, I guess, you've got a stubborn wife."
"XANDER?" I said as I entered our room. I found him sitting on the corner of the bed.
"Where's Bernice?" Xander said as he turned his head to my direction. I was cleaning in the kitchen when I heard the intercom.
"She's already resting in her room, Xander."
Xander stood up from the bed.
"I need her. I'm going to change clothes and I need her help."
I walked towards him. "I'm here. I'm your wife. I'll help you."
He turned to me, his eyebrows furrowed and almost in one line. "What? Was she not allowed to enter this room? Austin hired her as my personal nurse, right? Then she should be the one taking care of me."
"I'm your wife. I should be the one taking care of you," I explained. "Austin only hired her to help me. Besides, I already told her to rest."
"Fine. Just get me my clothes for tonight. I can already take care of myself."
I opened the closet and got him a pullover and pajamas. "Come on, I'll help you get dressed." I said, clearing my throat. This is the first time I'd do this if ever. When he was still in the hospital, it was always the nurse who helped him.
"I'm not invalid, sweetheart." He said in a mocking tone. "I can put on my clothes. Just hand them over to me."
I handed him his clothes, and he went to the bathroom alone with the help of his cane.
I followed him to the door. "Just call me if you need help."
He didn't answer, instead, he just closed the door on me.
I looked at the king sized bed in front of me. It was already nine in the evening. And this is our first night together in this apartment. Should we sleep beside each other tonight?
I glanced at the big couch in the room. Should I sleep on the couch?
You want him to believe that this marriage is for real. Then why are you sleeping on the couch?
Shit. I swallowed as my eyes went back to the bed. I hoped Xander wouldn't shove me away later.
My thoughts interrupted when the bathroom door opened. Xander went out, already dressed in his pajamas.
His scent immediately hit my nose. He smelled of mint and soap. His short hair was slightly disheveled. I wanted to close our distance and comb it for him but something was stopping me. I'm scared… he would push me away.
I couldn't believe he could be this intimidating. Suddenly, the nice and approachable Xander was gone.
Maybe that's my mission. To bring back the smile on his face. I must stop being awkward around him. I needed to show him that our relationship was real. I needed to stop being afraid. This was my chance. I should stop being guilty. I chose this path. Now, I have to do my best to make Xander fall in love with me.
"Let's go to bed, sweetheart." I said, holding his hand and guiding him to the bed.
"Are we sleeping on the same bed?" he asked in a frown.
"Well, yes. We're a married couple Xander. "Besides, there's only two rooms in this apartment. And Berna occupied the other one. It's cold. You don't want me to sleep on the couch, do you?"
"Fine. Let's share the bed together."
I watched him climb and lie down on the left side of the bed.
"I'll take the right side." I said as I sat on the opposite side next to him.
He just remained silent as he pulled up the comforter.
"I'll just leave the lampshade on."
"Yeah." He said then he turned his back on me.
I grabbed the remote from the nightstand to turn off the lights in the room.
I bit my lower lip as I finally lay down on the bed. Of course, he didn't want to face me sleeping. I felt something prick my heart.
Stop being sensitive about it. You're a stranger to him, Charity. He has amnesia, right?
I grabbed a pillow and placed it between us. Well, the bed was so big so even if I rolled over, I still wouldn't be able to touch him.
"Good night… Xander." I said in a soft voice as I stared at his back. We were only inches apart… but I felt like he was miles away from me.
"Good night, Charity."