Chapter 17
Vladimir’s POV
I get it now. I understand everything now.
One, four, three… that’s not I love you. Yeah, that’s a code. That’s a number. That’s the number of souls and memories she had collected. It should be the number of souls and memories she should have collected way back then.
One thousand four hundred three souls, yet she wasn’t able to reach that number because she saved me. She gave her blood to me, making me alive again yet she never thought that would make me come back to my true form… vampire.
So, since then I could see her because her blood runs inside my veins. I fell in love. Everything happened. She knew that when she saved me she would lose all those souls and memories she’d collected. The afterlife will be in chaos. She knows. She knew. She knew but she still saved me.
Why? Why saved me? I do not deserve to be saved by an angel.
Nevertheless, I am grateful I get to meet her and fall in love with her. For I am very sure that even after all these years, and even in the afterlife I would still fall for her over and over again. She would always be the only one who could make my heart beat.
Uriel, Uriel is just trying to save her. I know now. I know why Uriel wanted to kill me way back then, because that is the only way to save Cassy from everything. Yet, damn.
Why, she should have said it back then. She should have so she won’t suffer anymore. I don’t know what she did for the past thousand years while she’s collecting the lost souls and memories. I can’t imagine the pain she’d been through, especially that she even gave me her grace. I should really have died. Uriel should have killed me, yet she saved me again for the second time. She saved me again.
Damn! Why, Cassy. Why do you have to save me for the second time again? And, be in pain. Why do you have to do that? You should have told me.
"Why?" I asked her. “Why do you have to save me again, twice? Why? ” I closed my eyes, and felt the warm liquid from my eyes down to my cheeks. “Why do you have to do that? When you saved me— “
“When I saved you again for the second time, I ended up losing all the souls and memories so I needed to start again. Do you want to hear it? ” She gave me a look I’ve never seen before. It’s like she’s mad, no, she’s hurt, she’s no- I don’t know how to say it.
“I gave you my grace to heal your eyes and to keep you away from Uriel. I sealed my grace in yours protecting you from any angels especially from Uriel while I did my job. I started collecting all those souls and memories again. And, like I have promised, I will come back to redeem my grace.”
"You need it to heal your wings, right?" I asked, she nodded. "Yet, it won't make you go back to heaven and fix the afterlife?"
She didn’t answer my question so I dropped another. “Why did you save me? Why?”
"I don't know."
"You just don't save people because you don't know!"
“The first time I saved you, the reason is because of Fermine. Your human sister asked Fermine to let you live in return for her life. It’s a long story, just ask Fermine.”
"The second time?"
She looked away. She started looking up at the sky. “I fell in love with you. I just can’t afford to lose you so I selfishly saved you from Uriel and promised myself I will make everything right when the time comes.”
"Why not kill me now, then, please?" I cried. "That is the only way to make everything right."
"I didn't save you to kill you."
“Then, what are you going to do !?” I turned her to me but eventually I stopped when I saw tears in her eyes. I hugged her so tight that it hurts. “Sorry,” I whispered.
“I love you. And do. If that is the way, I will accept it. Like you said, I can be reincarnated right? I’ll wait for that lifetime. Maybe that time, we can be together without anyone stopping us. Maybe we’ll both become human when that time comes. ”
"No, you don't die, you just don't."
“You’re being selfish again! Let me help you. Let me save you just like what you told me. ”
“That is not what I meant by saving me!” She shouted and I heard her sobs. “That’s not it. You saved me by remembering every memory of me and not by dying!”
“Cassy,” I held her hand and she pushed it away. "I'm sorry."
“When you die, you will be reincarnated but all the memories you have, they will all be gone. You can never have them back. We don’t return memories, we keep them in the afterlife and make them dreams.”
“Is there any other way, better than that? How about you? What will happen to you?”
“I will disappear,” she said like it’s so easy.
"Will you come back?"
"I'm not sure."
“C’mon Cassy, please, will you promise you will come back?”
“I cannot promise that Chival. I just can’t. Though, I can promise one thing if you promise me two things.”
“Name it,” I nodded. “Anything. I’ll do it.”
“Promise, you’ll stay alive no matter what. You don’t die without my permission.” she said. "And even if you don't really sleep, will you please at least once try to so I could visit you in your dreams, just like this."
"Will you wait, just like this?" I looked around. This doesn’t even look like dreams. "What do you mean?"
“You are dreaming. You are just dreaming. You are inside your dream.”
“No. It can’t be. It seems so real, everything is so real. Since when did I start dreaming?”
"Yes, that's how it should be," she smiled and started walking.
I called her but she never looked back.
"Because when I'm gone, this is the only place that would connect us."