Time Bomb by All Time Low is classic. It's also inappropriately ironic compared with the crisis I just woke up to. Apparently, Ethan planted a bomb in the base because obviously the base is responsible for his own insecurity. And, I've recently come to the terms that against my own better judgment, I'm so in love with Ayla it's terrifying.
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I've recently realized that I am very much in love with Ayla Gordon. I was unsure and had my obvious reservations but... denial makes my ES flare up even more than the painful usual. I think weirdly enough I've loved her for an unrealistic amount of time, maybe it was a different type of love when I first met her- well the second time I met her. I fell in love with the way she sees the world, her hope, her innocence, the goodness she radiates. I fell in love with her humanity.
After Eveline's anniversary despite mouthing off to Mavis about what happened, she was very delicate with me. At first it annoyed me and made me uncomfortable, everyday she asked me what is something I'm happy to be alive to see. I usually gave her stupid answers like Cheerios or black shirts. I really wanted to work up the courage to say: you, Ayla Gordon. I knew it wouldn't happen and now, I had no intention of it happening.
Love doesn't come out of this world. It just doesn't survive.
Whether or not she loves me back, I still had the greatest bond with her and I will be forever grateful for that. I think it's only fitting that I go down with the ship for this one... I'm referring to the base of course. I said my goodbye to Ayla Gordon and didn't give her the chance to argue or even say anything for that matter which maybe wasn't the best choice. I'll never know. I'm okay with that, though. I'm happy with my recent life choices, all the little growth I've done. I've been at a standstill for a long time and then suddenly I woke up.
I knocked on every door in the base, trying to filter people out who were asleep or unconscious. I loaded up tents, pillows, blankets, food, weapons, medical supplies. I sent it off with people scurrying to get out but, I just watched.
In reality we truly don't know how much longer we have. Ethan apparently outright told Jasmine and Ayla that we had twenty minutes but whose to say he was telling the truth? We easily could be reduced to ash at any second, all this effort could be for nothing.
I couldn't fathom that Ethan betrayed the base. I played with Ethan. I came to him and he came to me when things were hard and I appreciated his attitude. It was hard to find genuinely good people in this world, those who retained their humanity despite having impressive powers were people I liked to be around.
The fact we speculated it was him... and we just let him go. I watched Kyle beat him mercilessly in my bedroom and it didn't feel right. Now...
I watched Jasmine hurry out the door, sprinting into the forest along with the others. I knew she loved being alive despite it all. I know she'd be okay without me. She'd make a great leader, she would help rebuild in Eveline's name.
We maybe have a couple minutes left. All I could do was stand by the front door and watch the lights of their torches and lanterns slowly fade out into nothing.
"Jackson."
I looked down and saw Mavis beside me, a crossed look on her face. "You have no intention on leaving?"
Shrugging, I turned back to the woods and watched as more lights slowly dimmed out. Somewhere, Ayla was among them and safe. "I served my purpose. I lived. I kept her safe. I'm content with this."
Mavis furiously shook her head, "You don't get to quit on me. Dying means you lost. It doesn't make you a hero or mean that all this chaos and pain will just stop. You can't just let it take you when survival is right there."
"Then go."
"Absolutely not. Not without you."
My heart began to race, my hands sticking to the course fabric of my jeans from sweat. "I just-"
"No one is asking you to die in order to be redeemed or accepted or however things are within your brain. You don't have to die to settle scores with what happened with Eveline or to appease those who said it should have been you." She grabbed my arm, "Live, Jack. For you. Not as a punishment you bestowed upon yourself, but as your own separate, valid human. I was wrong to never say it before."
I looked at her, taking her hand squeezing it. I wanted to thank you for all she's done for me- practically raising me. Always providing me insight and advice and believing in me. There was always extra work and love she showed me that I never bothered to acknowledge and appreciate.
"Live for Eveline. Live for your parents. Live for me, for Jasmine, Kyle. Live for the girl you allowed yourself to love so much."
I felt heat rise in my cheeks.
She's right.
"What comes after this?" I asked. "Where do we go and how do we come back from this?"
Mavis slowly shook her head, "The rebellion started with us, it doesn't die with us. The idea is alive. We don't need a base to solidify that." She squeezed my hand, "We will figure it out."
I yanked her forward with me, bolting as fast as we could out of the base and into the frigid, windy reality. My legs burned but I kept going, I couldn't even breathe but I pushed forward. We dodged trees, we yelled, it all happened so fast yet in slow motion. My world was ending.
Looking over my shoulder, people were still running away from the base. That place has been my home for four years, the creation of my sister who died for that work. Maybe we took that for granted- I never imagined I'd be put in this situation and leaving behind all I own and everything I know.
All for one girl. One girl they just couldn't let go.
Then came the explosion.
The noise was thunderous and engulfed all surrounding ambiance, releasing a forceful wave of heat that propelled us forward. It felt as if my eardrums would burst and as I kept running, life slowed down, everything was ringing and my own heartbeat crawled up my throat. I heard splintering wood, the cracking of glass. Trees bent and snapped, leaves engulfed in brilliant golden flames.
In front of me, Ayla stood with her hands covering her eyes. "Jack!" She screamed with a voice that crackled just like the overhead fire.
"What are you doing?" I shouted, still running as fast as I could. "Get down!"
My body collided with hers, knocking the stale and blazing air in my lungs. We flipped over as we collided but thankfully I landed on top of her, shielding her away from any flying debris and flames.