"Thaliana..."
At the gate of Rozzean's house, I saw Manang. It looked like she was going somewhere as she was dressed up. She approached me and then touched my arm. She looked at my hands and the part of my arm that got burned.
"Are you okay now? I-I'm sorry for what sir did the other day."
I shook my head at Manang, and we entered the house together.
"It's okay, Manang. I understand his anger. I'll do everything to make Rozzean forgive me."
"I believe you, dear. He will forgive you, just endure it, okay? I can't help you much, sorry."
This is a big help because he always opens the door for me and lets me in. If Rozzean knew I was coming, maybe Manang wouldn't let me in.
When we entered the house, I went back to the kitchen with Manang.
"Oh Thaliana,, I forgot the laundry I hung at the back, just a moment, okay? I'll leave you here in the kitchen for a while."
"Sure, Manang. I'll just warm up the food, then I'll bring it to Rozzean's room."
Manang nodded at me. I busied myself warming the dishes I cooked. After finishing, I transferred them to a bowl and placed them on a tray. I took the juice from the fridge while holding the glass.
"Manang."
I paused when I heard Rozzean's voice.
"Manang, did you--"
I was taken aback when he was now in front of me. He wasn't using a cane anymore, but he was still struggling to walk.
"R-Rozzean..."
I took a deep breath, tightly gripping the glass as I looked at him.
"Manang is at the back, tending the laundry, but she'll be back soon," I said. He didn't speak; his eyes were serious, not angry, just seriously looking at me.
He was so close.
He only took a few steps, but it felt like he was far away.
"What are you doing here? I told you not to come back, didn't I?" he asked.
He seemed calmer than before.
I glanced at the table where I had prepared the food for him.
"I-I cooked because--"
"I am thankful that you ate the food I cooked, Rozz. Manang said you haven't eaten since last night. I'll cook for you again later."
The word "surprise" is not enough to explain how I felt when I saw Klari entering the kitchen. She was smiling while holding a tray. My eyes were fixed on what she was holding. My breath became heavier when I realized what she said.
S-She cooked for Rozzean? And he... ate the food?
The plates are clean, with a little leftover food in the bowl. H-He ate what Klari prepared for him, but my food was thrown away?
"Who are you?" Klari asked me.
Oh yeah... who am I? Like Rozzean's question last night, who am I? The pain in my chest resurfaced. My eyes blurred with tears. The glass slipped from my trembling hands, creating a noise as it broke.
What are you doing, Thaliana?!
"I-I'm sorry."
I quickly kneeled and set down the juice I was holding. I picked up the broken glass. I know they're looking at me. My mind was on Rozzean and Klari.
What is Klari doing here?
S-She seems to have come from Rozzean's room. She was holding a tray. Manang is not here, so it seems like she came from outside. They were left alone here. Is she taking care of him? She was smiling... they seem to be getting along. Is this the first day Klari came?
I winced as a shard of broken glass cut my fingers. The tears I've been holding back started to fall. Not because of the pain from the glass, but because of the ache I felt seeing them together.
"O-Oh, Tali!"
I felt Manang kneel beside me, taking my bleeding hand.
"Tali?" I heard Klari's voice.
Manang helped me stand, then led me to the sink to wash my fingers that were cut by the broken glass. But my fingers, cut by the glass, didn't stop bleeding.
"Oh dear, you shouldn't have picked that up. Now, you're hurt."
Manang looked at me with concern. I wiped away my tears with one hand and smiled at her. I didn't look at Rozzean. I couldn't muster the courage to look at him, especially with Klari by his side.
It hurts to see them together.
Is there really no hope for him to forgive me?
"Manang, here's the tray. Rozz has finished eating."
From the corner of my eye, I saw Manang approach Klari and take the tray. After taking it, Klari assisted Rozzean. That's when I found myself facing them.
I was waiting...
I was hoping he'd tell Klari that he can manage on his own now, that he doesn't need her help. I was waiting for him to create some distance, but Rozzean's hand found its way to Klari's waist for support.
My lips fell open in shock. It felt like my chest was being stabbed repeatedly.
D-Do I... really need to see this?
"We'll go back to the room, Manang. If we need anything, we'll just call you," Klari said.
A-And they are heading inside his room. Rozzean is letting Klari take care of him. I-It looks like he's okay now, he seems to be getting better. He's eating, walking without his crutch... he's okay without me.
"S-Sure," manang replied, then glanced at me.
But before they could leave the kitchen, I spoke up.
"W-Wait."
I faced both of them. It was a painful sight, witnessing the man I love being taken care of by another woman.
Damn it. Why is this so painful?
But I tried my best, maybe this is okay now? Too see that Rozzean's okay. He ate, he looks fine now...
Perhaps... it's time to let go...
"Wait... please..."
Maybe his love for me isn't deep enough that he can't forgive me for betraying him. If he truly loves me, he won't endure this.
He won't show this to me.
"Do you need something from us, miss?" Klari asked me.
She had a serious expression while looking at me. But I turned my eyes to Rozzean.
I forced a small smile even though my eyes were filled with tears.
"I... I will ss-top here."
He looked at me intently.
"I won't bother you anymore. I can see that you are recovering now, and that's enough for me. If..." I quickly wiped away the tear that fell from my eyes, "if you can't forgive me, it's okay. I won't do anything, I w-won't come back to your house. Just eat and take care of yourself."
I clung tightly to the hope of his forgiveness, but as I looked at him now with Klari, that hope slowly faded away. It vanished completely... e-everything.
I didn't know that loving someone could be this painful.
I-I made a mistake, and I regret it deeply. But I never expected that the consequence of that mistake would be this agonizing.
"T-Take care of yourself, hmm?" I tried to smile at him.
I took a deep breath, step back and removed the ring he gave me. I placed it on the kitchen island.
I saw Rozzean's eyes fixate on it.
"I-I love you. I love you so much, Rozzean, but I-I won't insist anymore."
After saying that, I quickly walked past them. I hoped he would call me, but even as I left the house, I didn't hear him calling my name, even faintly.
I went outside and headed to my car.
My eyes were blurry with tears as I left Rozzean's house.
I guess... This is really the end for us.