Lydia’s P.O.V:
“What does it mean?” It was Lyric who spoke, breaking the icy silence.
“The bullet has turned inside, due to the impact on her head.” The doctor explained. “It’s no longer near the facial nerve but it’s touching the glossopharyngeal nerve instead, which explains the searing pain she felt at the back of her throat and tongue. If the bullet is not removed now, Ms. McKenzie will continue to feel this searing pain at certain intermissions and it might get severe as time passes by.”
“But can the bullet be removed, right?” Stephen asked desperately. “She’ll be fine after the bullet is removed, right?”
“Yes. If the operation is successful, Ms. McKenzie can go back to living a normal life.”
“If?” My mother gasped. “What do you mean ‘if’?”
“There’s a ten per cent chance that the operation might be lethal.” The doctor informed us solemnly. “The human brain is a very sensitive area. Anything might happen during the operation. She can end up with brain damage or …”
“I could die?” I asked the doctor before anyone else could. “But there’s still a 90% chance of survival, right?”
“Yes.” The doctor confirmed. “With the correct tools and a better operating room, which are available at Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota. As of now, it is one of the best in the world.”
“We’ll go there.” I told everyone firmly. “I want to get the bullet removed.”
“Lydia…” My mother began but I shook my head.
“I’ve made up my mind, mom.” I told her. “I want to get the operation done with.”
“Very well.” The doctor took the x-ray and placed it back inside its folder. “I’ll contact the doctors at Mayo Clinic and set up an emergency appointment as early as possible.”
“Thank you, doctor.”
Everyone turned to me once the doctor had left the room. “Are you sure about this?” Stephen asked me. “We’ll support you whatever your decision is, but are you sure?”
“Yes.” I told them, my resolve absolute. “This pain…it’s excruciating. I can’t stand to feel this for the rest of my life.”
“We understand, honey.” Mom wove her fingers through my hair. “We’ll take care of the paperwork.”
“Thank you.” I nodded in appreciation as everyone left the room one by one; everyone except for Lyric.
“Lydia…” He began but I cut him off.
“I have a confession.” I told him. “And I need to get this off my chest before I go for surgery.”
“There’s really no need fo-”
“Yes, there is.” I nodded. “There is because, all this time…I’ve been selfish too. I kept thinking that you were my one shot at redemption. When I met you the first time…I saw myself in you, the past me before the incident and I wanted to make sure that you didn’t end up the same as me…and also, maybe, if I saved you, I might be able to save myself too.”
There…I was finally able to say it.
It had been completely unintentional, but when Ivy had asked me not to string Lyric along anymore, I had realized why I had been doing so. And the realization hadn’t been pleasant. Yes, I loved Lyric; there was no doubt about it. But I had been selfish too. And I couldn’t lie to myself or to Lyric any longer. I had to give him the choice, to get out while he can…in case the operation didn’t go as planned.
“I’m sorry for using you like this…for trying to fix you, even if it had been involuntary.” I looked down at my hands lying limply on my lap. “I’ll understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore…”
When I didn’t hear anything from him, I thought that my worst nightmare might have come true…that he might have left…that was until I felt two fingers under my chin, lifting my face up to look into eyes of emerald green.
“Nothing is ever going to get me to leave your side, not you or anyone else, even the devil himself.” Lyric told me firmly. “Once I’ve made up my mind, nothing can move me from my decision. And I’ve chosen you for life, Lydia.”
“You’re not mad at me?” I asked, almost hesitantly.
“To be honest, I always had a hunch.” Lyric gave a small smile. “But I didn’t mind the little naggings and the little banters. They made me feel like myself again. Ever since my brother recovered, I had almost forgotten what I truly wanted…what my dreams or ambitions had been. But you brought me back. You made me realize who I am all over again and even if I had a chance…I wouldn’t change a thing about us. Believe it or not, McKenzie, we make each other better.”
“I know.” I told him, holding his hands tightly. “Thank you for coming into my life.”
“We’ll get through this.” He said firmly, squeezing my hands in reassurance. “We’ve come a long way from where we began, but we still have the rest of our lives. We’ll survive this.”
“Yes.” I said. “Together.”
*
Three days later, we were on the plane to Minnesota, the operation having been set for the day after. Everything was set, thanks to my parents. Ivy was unable to come with us since she had a complicated patient at work and my father had to prepare for the upcoming elections. But mom, Nate, Steph and Lyric had joined me.
I didn’t know what the outcome would be, but as I sat on the plane, holding Lyric’s hand tightly in mine, I could only pray to any God who was listening…’please don’t let this be the end of us.’