Life doesn't give everyone a second chance. If you're lucky enough to get another chance remember to hold it tight and make the full of it.
The past definitely holds some importance in one's life. If not anything but still the lessons we learnt from it.
On a cold December morning, Dehradun is quite a pleasant place. Cold breezes, snowfalls, uncertain rains and her favourite masala chai. And this is what makes Amaya Kareem loves about the winters. It's silence, it gives peace. Dehra is a good place for her, away from everyone, every chaos. But still, she misses him, sometimes a lot, sometimes a little.
Sitting by the hilltop, she is lost in her solitude. A certain voice brings her back, a familiar cologne fills her in, hugging her from behind.
"Missing me, already?" He whispers lightly near her ear, kissing the ear lobe in between.
"Why would I? Wake up man, I was just thinking about something.."
"..Something that's not me?"
"Something that's certainly not you.."
"Then you better stop thinking about that. Anything which doesn't include me shouldn't cross your mind, ever."
"Well, I don't think so. I am an individual and I can have my own thoughts."
"Nah not anymore. You belong to me, never forget that."
"I belong to no one, I hope you get it by now."
"But I thought you love me?"
"I do, but that doesn't mean you own me."
"It does and it remains the same. Only a few months left before you graduate from school. I want you to get these things clear."
"But..."
"... No buts.."
Turning towards him, she looks into his eyes. As if looking for something, something which is missing.
Black against hazel brown. Obsession against hope.
And she fails to read in between the lines, he fails to see the reality. They fail to see the signs. They are lovers, crazy lovers, but companions? Only time will tell.
Ek muddat se teri yaad bhi ayi na hamein
aur ham bhuul gaye hon tujhe aisa bhi nahin
(I have not even remembered you for a long time And it's not like I have forgotten you)
~Firaq Gorakhpuri
One will always think that maybe some lessons could have been learnt much easier than the hard way. Perhaps life would have always laughed at the thought. There's nothing as such an easy way to learn a lesson and even if there is, still then the hard way would be thrown at our face.
Zain Amir has always been the one to think like that. He always asked himself this question what if life had not been so hard for him? What if he never got his heartbroken because of some feelings which now seems stupid to him? What if, just what if Amaya Kareem came into his life a little earlier? Life would surely be so much better as he thinks.
Then the very next moment another chaotic thought came up in his mind, leaving it a complete mess. What if he did the same mistakes her ex-husband did and things didn't work out between them? Then his life would be nothing. As the thought came up everything started making sense to him.
Things happen for a reason and surely his meeting with Amaya at this point of life is for the better. At least now at this point in their lives, they both know what they don't want for themselves.
As for what they want, well we all are humans perhaps humans never know what they want in life, it keeps on changing with time. And Zain Amir is that typical kind of human who simply doesn't know what will he want in the next five years but for now, all he wants is his friend's happiness. All he wants is to provide her with her share of happiness in life, something they both have lacked over the years.
No one knows what will happen next in their lives, yet they keep on thinking about it. Perhaps the past is just another lesson we all have learnt, some in a hard way and well some maybe in not so hard way, but someday one has to let the past go and move on in life with the lessons.
Now is the time to live, now is the time to breathe, now is the moment when one can make it happen, when one will make moments happy that will remain there in the canvas, tainting the void canvas of life with numerous hues of love, filling happiness all over it. They deserve it, more than anyone else, Amaya Kareem deserves her share of happiness in life.
It's been five weeks since Amaya's birthday, the things really changed over in this period, but the good note is, it changed for the better, on a positive curve.
The departure of spring certainly doesn't bring sadness in their lives, the arrival of summer brings yet another warmness in between them.
Now there is no more hiding, no more denial for those nightmares which rarely visit Amaya now. If anything, there is this new hope that maybe after years she can rely on a shoulder. And that's all Zain Amir wants from his Amu. Just a little faith in him that he will never let her fall, never in this lifetime again. And Amu is trying, slowly but certainly.
Zain for now chose to live at the moment. He is quite aware of his feelings towards the girl with brown orbs, he knows where he had lost his heart and he is certain that it is in the safe hands of Amaya.
He knows now he has a home to return, and maybe someone waiting for his return too. He also knows that when he lost his heart, he certainly didn't make the contract that she will give hers to him too, and at this moment after everything that girl had been through, he never wants her to lose her heart to anyone, not even to him.
She deserves happiness and her heart too, her love too. So for now, or maybe for a much long years, there is or will be no way in hell to put his feelings in words in front of her. He will surely not hide them, he never did. She will understand it by herself, maybe she already knows, maybe not. But telling her about his feelings and ruining this beautiful bond between them is never an option.
Perhaps with every passing day, he is falling for her more, losing his sanity more finding himself more.