“I am all fine”
I mumbled soon as I took a step backward. What is this feeling… I… I find it hard to breath…
“Is that so?”
Not looking at him, somehow, I am so curious to know what kind of face does he mad. But… really, I… I should leave soon. This is bad…
“The jet ski is ready… shall we follow the others now?”
Looking at him, he held his hands as if he wants me to reach him. that very same hands… that I once hold when we danced before. That very same hands that hugged me to his arms…
At first I thought he is a jerk. Well… he really is a jerk… but how funny of me to fall for that jerk.
He doesn’t care about me before, but now… what made him change his heart?
Or is he doing it out of conscience of all that he did?
“On second thought, I think you should go. I mean… I am not really fond of the sea. Its like a moon for me. I would be glad by just looking at it”
Smiling, what am I even talking about? And of all, why do I feel like I was talking about him?
Weird, it is really not like me at all.
“Hey, what are you doing?”
“Huh? Preparing a seat. Or would you want to sit on the sand with your dress?”
Looking at him as he prepare his shirt on the ground, I can’t help but frown my face. He… he did just strip his shirt off right in front of me…
Shaking my head, what is he even thinking? Isn’t he going to ride-
“Here, have a seat”
He casually mumbled as he sat on the sand.
“Wai.. wait. You are not gonna ride”
Not answering my question, he just lay his back on the white sand. We are not far from the water but even if the wave blew strong, it won’t be enough to hit where we are.
“Nah”
Is it just me? Or what? I am really starting to doubt if it is still Aiden. The same Aiden that I know… wait… in the first place… I don’t know much about him at all…
Sitting down on the seat he prepared, it is not as if I would die if my dress touch the sand. But it would be a waste if I would just…
“Thanks…”
I mumbled. Time flies and it wasn’t that hard since we are just staring at the waves. Letting the sound of the wind touches our ears. Listening to the dancing rhythm that the ocean was playing.
More than anything else, I feel so calm.
“How are you doing?”
He started. Even if he is not looking at me, I can see it on the corner of my eyes how his eyes drifted on the reflection of the sun.
“I am doing fine. More than what I had imagined…”
Smiling as I remember those days, I can’t help but feel so lucky. That after all those things… I am still here. I am still… me.
“I lose so many people I hold dear… it is still like a dream for me. i… I won’t deny the fact that sometimes, I feel like even this is a dream”
Letting out a deep sigh, he just keeps on listening. And before I even knew it, I speak more than what I intended to say.
“I saw lots of new things, discovered lots of beautiful places… met some kind people… and I am not sure but, I think I found myself already. Not complete yet but… I am one step closer”
Closing my eyes, I can’t help that as the wind blew a bit strong. As if the wind is embracing me…
“I am glad to hear that…”
“And how about you? I can hear your name wherever I go”
He let out a small chuckle.
“Not compared to a jade beauty that makes her name in someone else’s brand”
I can’t help but giggle. It is true, I did accept some modeling and pictorial overseas. Is he jealous because I did that in other company than his?
“What jade beauty are you talking about?”
“A jade beauty that I lose”
I stopped on my laugher. Looking at him, his eyes are close. But he keeps on mumbling. It wasn’t loud but even with the gush of the wind, I can still here is so loud. As if it is the only thing that I can hear of as of this moment.
“A beauty I never cherished more than what she deserved… a beauty that I let go because all I did was give her pain… hurt her…” chuckling with his words, I can’t help but lock my eyes on him. hiding his face behind his arms, why is he like this?
“A beauty that I can’t forget… I was the one who bought her, but I am also the reason of her suffering. I…”
Gathering up my courage, I can’t help but speak up. Why is he saying so much things like that? he…
“But that one you are talking about was so grateful for what you did for her. Even though she thinks of you as a jerk, you… you had a place in here”
Pointing my head, I slightly chuckle.
“And here…”
I close my eyes and a tear starts to fall as my hand can hear a heartbeat of my own.
…
“Its been a long time… Lilith”
Her tomb is just like what it was the last time I saw it. Even the place remains calm. I know Lilith would have loved to see this place on her own. The sky was so clear, and the flowers are all around the place. So quiet yet not so lonely at all.
“Do you know, I had fun seeing lots of place. Some have those big towers and some have beautiful flowers. I saw lots of sculptures and paintings. The foods are also different in every places. Would you believe that I also saw grass of fressia in other country”
I smiled as I tell her many things. I am holding a bouquet of flowers on my hand. I am not sure of what her preference is but I made sure to order a simple yet beautiful one.
Afterall, Lilith doesn’t seem to be someone who prefer extravagant one.
“I though that it would be a good thing to let you see those things beside me. I wonder what would your face looks like if you were ther. Would you also be glad at the scenery as I did?”
Silence, that is what hugged as the wish sways my hair.
Somehow, my eyes feels hot.
“It was so fast… it is as if… yesterday we were just talking with each other and then…”
It was indeed a shock. If only I know that it would happen to her. If only I had the chance to save her then she would still be here…
And not far from where I was, I saw a figure of someone I feel so familiar with.
Someone I can never despise no matter what I do. Someone… I am afraid I can never forgive.
That person I once looked up to…
“Lea… how have you been?”
“Brylle…”
“I am so glad you didn’t forget about me”
Forget about you? You made a such big mark on my life… how could … how could I ever forget about you?