For a moment, there were no more words.
Just the muffled silence of the morning, like a warm veil enveloping everything around.
The sound of the wind filtering through the leaves was almost imperceptible, as if even nature hesitated to break that instant.
Inside me, thoughts crashed like waves at high tide, intense, disordered, and carrying fragments of doubts, fears and memories. Each one banged hard against the walls of my chest, resonating in the form of anguish and hesitation.
Nayun stood in front of me, motionless, looking down, her long eyelashes hiding what was going on behind her eyes. There was something about the way her shoulders slumped, as if they were carrying an invisible weight. Her silence was almost deafening, as if she were shouting everything she couldn't say.
I watched her hands, trembling, intertwined with nervousness. I wanted to say something, anything, but each word died before it even formed a sound. Time seemed to dilate, seconds stretched out like hours, and I was still there, trapped by the desire to do something.
Leave her alone? Respect the space she might need right now? Give her a moment to breathe, pull herself together, find herself?
Yes, that seemed to be the best answer. The most sensible. The right one.
Give her space. To allow her to breathe, to reorganize herself inside, without my presence weighing her down even more.
Not when I had said, with all my heart, with all my soul, that I didn't want to see her suffer.
Even if, ironically, the cause of her suffering was me.
It was impossible to just turn around and walk away.
It was impossible to pretend that my heart didn't ache to see her , so fragile, so silent, so distant, even though I was the one causing that pain.
It was impossible to watch her crumble inside and not want to reach out, not want to hold her, even though I was the one who pushed everything to the limit, who made her reach this point.
I felt torn between the weight of guilt and the desperate urge to fix what I'd broken.
Every misty look in her eyes, every silent sigh, was a knife digging deeper into me.
And then I made a decision...
If we've come this far... Let's go with everything, shall we? I'm a hypocrite, I'm selfish... So, since I know that and I've accepted that part, why didn't I make everything clear once and for all?
Because that's all I had to do.
Because it was all I could do.
I stood up slowly, pushing my chair back with a slight drag that seemed to echo in the silence of the room. My footsteps were firm on the floor.
When I got close enough to Nayun, I held out my hand.
I touched hers gently, almost as if asking permission in silence. Nayun's fingers were cold, hesitant, but they didn't pull back.
There was something in her eyes, confusion, tiredness... But also a spark. A trace of doubt.
Without waiting for any response or action from her, I cast the teleportation spell on us.
The magical energy flowed between us and the space around us, warm and vibrant. The space around us glowed slightly, as if reality had taken on another color.
In the blink of an eye, the world around us changed color.
Everything fell silent.
Not the same uncomfortable silence as before, but a new one, where the silence still continued, but with a different vibration.
We reappeared several meters above planet Earth, floating above the bluish atmosphere that shimmered beneath our feet.
We were enveloped by a magical field that allowed us to breathe, to remain unstable, to stand on invisible ground and not be swallowed up by the emptiness of space. The planet rotated slowly beneath us, immense, silent and alive.
I slowly let go of Nayun's hand, but I didn't move away.
She seemed confused, stunned by the regretful change, but her eyes moved slowly, taking in everything around her. The light of the earth reflected on her face.
Nayun looked straight ahead, then down at her feet. And then like a frightened cat, she pulled at my body.
She opened my shirt with clenched fists, as if the world was about to collapse...
"Calm down! It's all right... Look!"
I murmured softly, wrapping my arms around her, trying to reassure her. Gently, I turned her body slightly so that she could see what was in front of us.
Planet Earth stretched out before us in all its magnitude, blue, white and green, pulsing with life, spinning slowly in the silent void of space.
She asked, still breathing unsteadily.
"How? That's it? Wouldn't it be better to ask... why?"
I asked with a slight smile, trying to ease the tension.
"Oh yes, that's right..."
"So, Theo, why are we in space? Come on, tell me... do you want to kill me with your heart, you idiot?"
"Ouch! Ouch! Right... Sorry!"
I complained when I felt his nails dig into my arm with a vengeful pinch.
Seeing my face pretending to be in pain, Nayun smiled slightly and went back to staring at the world in front of us.
She asked, without looking at me directly, but with a firm voice. Her face was now more vivid, as if a mist had begun to dissipate.
It had certainly been a good choice to do that.
"I brought you here... To make a few things clear to you."
He said calmly, also looking at the planet,
"...You must have thought that I didn't think you were enough, or that maybe I didn't love you the way I said I did, right?"
Nayun didn't answer immediately, but her body stiffened a little in my arms. It was easy to guess. Any woman would think that. Anyone.
"That's what it looked like..."
She whispered, almost inaudibly.
It was understandable. What woman would accept hearing from her boyfriend that he was attracted to others, even though he was still with her?
They would surely wonder if they were insufficient, if love had grown cold, if there was something wrong with them. And Nayun, even so strong, was human too.
"I want to make it clear here. There's no way that can happen."
I said firmly, turning my face slightly to look at her sideways.
She looked up, not angrily, but with a kind of silent pain in her eyes. A pain that didn't ask for justification, but truth.
"You say it's impossible... but you want to have other women by your side besides me."
He admitted as he shook his head.
"But that doesn't mean I've stopped loving you. Even if five... or ten women come along, you'll still be my first, my number one in my heart."
She frowned, but didn't remember.
"Number one in your heart..."
She repeated in a low voice, as if tasting the phrase in her mouth before swallowing.
There was a short silence. And then, with a trembling but serious voice, she asked:
I answered without hesitation, looking straight into her eyes.
"You're my passion. My first love, my first kiss, my first time... and above all, my first woman. Obviously, it's impossible not to put you at the top."
She took a deep breath, as if the words had hit something inside her. But she didn't interrupt. And I continued, because there was more that needed to be said, even if it hurt.
"I'm not stupid enough to say that I'm going to love everyone equally. That's almost impossible. If even a mother has her favorite child, even if she won't admit it, imagine a man with several wives."
She arched an eyebrow, but kept listening. I knew it was cruel, it was ugly to say... but it was the truth. And she deserved the truth.
"Even if I try to show that I love them all the same... the heart never lies. And mine... will always come back to you first."
Nayun looked away for a moment, as if struggling with what she was feeling. Part of her seemed relieved. Part of her still hurt. And part of her... was trying to understand where all this put her.
"So... what am I in this heart of yours? The base? The center? Or just the first piece of a dream puzzle?"
"You're the reason I started this puzzle."
"Without you, there wouldn't be any pieces to put together."
She bit her lip again, and for the first time in a long time... didn't flinch when she looked at me.
She wasn't completely healed. Nor ready to accept everything at once. But she was there, listening.
And that... was already much more than I expected.