Erik's POV
I know I have a lot to do but seeing my mate sleeping peacefully beside me made me stay for a bit longer. I kept staring at my gorgeous mate, I didn't want anyone to disturb my precious peace, so I blocked everyone on the mind link.
There's something wrong, Liam, my wolf said. I frowned and looked at my mate. She didn't mention anything.
What's the problem?
I can't connect with her wolf. He said. What could be the problem with her wolf? This is troublesome. I should ask Tia about this later.
I kept on thinking about what Liam said and kept staring at her. She turned on the bed, faced the ceiling, and stretched her arms. I pretended to sleep, I felt her stare, and she cuddled close to my body, hugging me. She sniffed my scent and broke the hug. She went to the bathroom and heard the shower running.
I still pretended to sleep when she went out of the bathroom. I couldn't help but sniff the air, smelling her fresh scent from the bath. She smelled so nice that it aroused me. I hid my desires for her, thinking I still had many things to do, and I also planned a special dinner with her.
She finished changing and kissed me before she went out of the room. I opened my eyes and unblocked the links. "Alpha, where are you?! The other alphas are looking for you!" Vincent shouted at my head. We were planning the move of the packs, talking about the design of the place, where exactly on the different corners they would build their home for their pack.
I sighed and went to the bathroom. "Fifteen minutes," I said with finality. Vincent didn't bother anymore since I used a stern tone. I entered the bathroom and opened the shower.
After the shower, I brushed my teeth and changed. I left the room and headed straight to my office since all the Alpha were already present.
When I reached my office, I sighed and opened the door. I looked at everyone seriously, showing them that I was above them. They all stopped talking when they saw me and bowed. I walked towards my table, walked around it, and sat on my chair. I rested my arms on the table and glanced at the Alphas who were currently bowing down to me.
"What are we going to talk about?" I asked.
"You have mentioned building a wall surrounding the whole country," Rick asked.
"Yes, what about it?" I asked him.
"Where are we going to get all the materials? Since this is a big project, the forest will be at risk," He explained. What he said is correct. If we cut down trees just to build up the wall surrounding the whole country, the forest will be at risk, and maybe the moon goddess will punish us.
"Our witch will be going to put a barrier in this land, and it will take a month before she will do it. After that, she will be the one who will provide the lacking materials," I answered him truthfully. He nodded, agreeing to my decision.
"Anything else?"
"Some of the Alphas want to train with your warriors," Alpha Ross, who I appointed to the south, said.
"You may proceed to the training grounds. My gamma's right-hand man will be there to assist you," I said. The three alphas bowed, making their way outside the office, chatting happily.
After the three went out, Kyle, who I appointed to the north, stepped forward holding a vast map. "This is what you requested in our last meeting, sire," He said, showing me the map. It was the map that I requested, the map of the country.
The map of the country that was hidden away in our storage room was from centuries ago. I am lucky enough that someone has an updated version of it. I laid the map on the table, and the alphas I appointed to different spots in the country came closer to take a look. I marked the places I chose for them to relocate their pack and where we will start building the wall.
After the meeting, I did some little paperwork, checking the problems within the pack and writing my decision, then I gave them to Vincent for him to implement my orders. I got lost on track not until Clara mind-linked me. "Are you busy, love?" She asked.
"A little. Why what's wrong?" I asked, full of worry.
"Want to eat lunch with you,"
I felt relieved that nothing had happened. "I won't be finishing this work until late afternoon, sweetheart," I said. I was actually planning on having a special dinner with her. That is why I am finishing my paperwork quickly as I can.
I felt her sadness, and I felt a little guilty. "How about we have a dinner date? Hmm?" I added, trying to make her feel better.
"Of course!" She exclaimed. I shook my head left and right, smiling at her excitement. I felt relieved, and I heard her giggle. "I'll tell you when you have to get ready," I said, informing her to wait for me.
Back to the present -
It was just a moment ago that I was planning my proposal to her, we even talked happily when I invited her to dinner, but now my mate is now unconscious.
"Your Luna, your Queen, is lying down unconscious, and one of you can't tell me what's wrong?!" I shouted at the doctors, who kept telling me they didn't know what was wrong.
"Can you calm down!" Tia shouted back to me while examining her body of Clara. She looked at me angrily, "This is not a sickness that the doctors can cure!" She said, angry at my outburst.
"LEAVE!" I ordered the doctors to leave since they were useless. I let Tia examine her body while I pace around the room, worried sick about the condition of my mate.
"Someone is interfering. Who the hell is this!" Tia said, angry that she could not help Clara because of someone else's powers.
"Can't you do something else?!" I asked, panicking at the situation.
"Can't you understand? I, a witch who lived for a thousand years, can't cast a spell on someone. It just means one thing, this someone lived more than me," She said, biting her nails due to frustration.
I sat beside Clara, held her hand, and rested my forehead on her hand. We were all quietly thinking of a way to save her when suddenly Clara began shouting.
"Mom, please, don't leave me!" She shouted and started crying. She kept on tossing on the bed. She was having a nightmare.
"Clara? Babe? Wake up. It's me!" I said, pushing her slightly, trying to wake her up.
"No! Stop!" Tia shouted, rushing to my side.
"She is not having an ordinary nightmare where you can just wake her up! Spells or powers that we don't know about are on her! She could lose her mind if you force her to wake up!" Tia said, scolding me. I felt helpless and slumped my back to my chair.
"Mom, dad! Wake up, please! No, no!" Clara cried, mentioning her parents. Erik leaned closer to the bed and clasped Clara's hand tightly.
"Shh, baby, I'm here," I said, trying not to cry. I was so scared that I couldn't sleep. The shouting of Clara happened from time to time, but most of the time, she was crying.
I hate myself that I can't even ease her pain. "Oh, moon goddess, what should I do?" I prayed, hoping for some answers.
Clara's POV
"Moon Goddess," I gasped and whispered.
She smiled, fixing her hair, putting it behind her ear, and then looked at me seriously. "Why are you running away?" She asked. I looked down and stared at my feet. "It's painful," I said, lowering my voice.
"It is, but you are trying to forget," She said.
"But I can't just" I couldn't finish what I was trying to say when she said something that I couldn't deny.
"Forgetting the incident, rejecting the memory of their deaths is like rejecting their sacrifice and forgetting their bravery," She said. I felt embarrassed. I kept trying to forget the memory since it was too painful for me, but I didn't know I was insulting my saviors.
"Why me?" I asked the moon goddess, feeling tired of everything.
"Why not you?" She said. I couldn't think of anything to tell her in that matter. I just looked at her and then avoided eye contact.
"Your mate is getting worried," She said. My head instantly raised, and I looked at her straight into her eyes. "But you won't be going back yet."
I frowned when she said I couldn't go back yet. "Why?" I asked, worried that I was dead.
"You need to overcome it. You are my vessel after all, and" She stopped talking and looked at me sadly. I looked at her with a questioning face.
"Your wolf is drowning."
Hearing what she said made me realize a lot of things. My eyes grew big at what she said. I was depressed, forcing myself to be happy, locking away the painful memories, but I couldn't forget the painful feeling, Ignoring my loneliness and burying myself in books.
During the war, I let my locked emotions out in one go. Feeling our warriors' deaths made me even more depressed, but I ignored my negative feeling, forcing myself to be okay. Like something tragic never happened. That is why I always feel Angeline within me even though she is quiet, not responding to me. It's not that she doesn't want to, but she can't.
I bit my lip, angry at myself for running away. Angeline is always a part of me. I can't think that I could be sane if I lost her. "What should I do?" I asked Evangeline.
She smiled at me and came closer to hug me. "Everything will be okay," She said. Because of her touch and encouragement, I calmed down and strengthened my resolve.
"Face your past properly, don't let it hunt you any longer, face them properly, accept your feelings, don't deny, don't reject, let it all out."
She looked me straight and fixed my hair, putting it behind my ear. "I cannot lose you. I have been waiting for you to be born. I won't let you drown and be corrupted," She said, smiling. "You are too precious, my daughter."
After that, she vanished and made me experience hell again. I strengthened my resolve, but after countless tries, my emotions shut down, and I couldn't feel anything.
It was too painful for me. How could I move on from this? I can't, I shouldn't. I got used to feeling the pain that I just watched the scene repeatedly without any emotions.
"Remember what I taught you" I heard my mother's word.
I closed my eyes, trying to remember what my mother always used to tell me. "If there will be a time that you cannot move forward, always think about those close to you, what they would be feeling, what they would think if they would get worried. Think of those who cared for you that are also important to you."
I opened it, and there was one name that popped into my head.
"Erik," I whispered. I cried, thinking that he must be feeling awful, feeling lost that I was not there with him. Erik has been patient with me since the beginning, not forcing me to tell things.
Melissa, Lia, Tia and Angela. These beautiful ladies who always supported me, my lovely sisters. Tia must be irritated by now that she can't do anything. Lia must be pestering Ian, asking for some information about me. Angela must be crying non-stop, and Melissa must be biting her nails, panicking at the situation.
Ian, he must be blaming himself for not protecting me. Vincent must be crying, not sleeping, just to find something to help me. Erik must feel lost, lonely, and scared since he can't feel me. He must be so worried that he stopped sleeping and eating, not leaving my side.
"My family, I need to go back," I whispered. After what I said, the scene where my former pack got killed replayed, and I cried and cried again, but in the end, at the time where Vincent and I were on the grave, instead of saying I'll be back with Klaus's head, I said "I joined Vincent's pack and met my mate, I also met countless of beautiful souls that I can trust. I will never forget this. I will avenge you, but please rest and don't worry too much. Vincent is always making sure that I am safe with my mate, my pack," I said.
I kneeled down to be closer to their graves and cried. I say and tell them that I love them with all of my heart, that I miss them, and that sometimes when I don't know what to do, I always find them.
I told them everything that I'd hidden in myself. Whining to my parents about the things that happened, asking for their forgiveness that I let Klaus go and that I was trying to forget how they sacrificed their lives for me.
My head was in their graves with my arms supporting me. I was crying, finally trying to say goodbye to my parents, my former pack, and dared to be weak.
I was sobbing, telling my parents every bit of my feelings and thoughts when the scenery changed. I returned to the place full of darkness, calmed myself, saw some light, and glanced from behind.
There I saw my parents with my former pack smiling at me. I bit my lip, stopping myself from crying, and smiled at them until they vanished. I let my tears out and continued crying. Evangeline showed herself and hugged me.
She pointed at my heart, smiled at me, and said.
"They will always be with you."