Alexander Walters
I saw Katherine off to her apartment and came back to mine. Now that she was gone, the house felt kind of empty and I was back to being alone. But at least she's just a door away, but I promised to stay away from her in the meantime, so I guess I'll be sticking with that and giving her the well–deserved space she needs.
I went to my indoor bar and took out a bottle of whiskey and a shot glass—I felt like taking a swig all of a sudden and I had to give in, so I poured myself a shot.
I guess it's because I needed a distraction from the new thoughts that were being formed in my head about Katherine, about whatever existed between us, and about how southside my initial plan for her was heading. Just for a while because I am supposed to go get ready to see my parents in about five minutes.
I would say I'm disappointed at myself for how I have fumbled during the past three days, but that would just make me sound like a sex-carved jerk.
I wondered what had gotten into me that made me get so soft when it came to Katherine or whenever I'm around her. I can't believe that I had Katherine with me for a whole three days, for a whole seventy–two hours and I didn't even make advances at her.
Considering how fragile Katherine is and I defiantly know she's having feelings for me—I've been noticing her tenseness and slight changes in her behavior—I knew that by the time I sweet talked my way to her heart and change her decision, making her set down those damn walls of hers I find quite annoying, she wouldn't give in.
I see the look in her eyes, I know she wants me. She wants me so badly. But of course, she's a prude who's having her first throw at what a relationship is and she's feeling uneasy about letting go of her principles. It's supposed to be a gradual process, especially for someone like her.
But I know my way around girls like her, and I know the shortcut to speed up that gradual process and get the ball rolling. Sadly, for some reason, I've repeatedly failed time after time to employ those methods on Katherine.
Not only that but now that I'm taking a look at it from a distance, it seems like she's doing more than just slowing down my game. The girl is gradually changing me as well.
Here I am forming annoying nicknames, thinking about her and her smile day, afternoon, and night—even in my dreams, grinning like a fool whenever her image pops in my head, thinking about ways to satisfy and make her happy, and definitely not in the way I'd like to satisfy her.
Apart from that, I have started taking my studies seriously—not that it's a bad thing, but I actually do commend and would appreciate her for being the boost behind my currently great grades. Just because of this girl, I bought textbooks, skipped a lot of parties, and hung out with my friends just to make sure I got a good grade on a test so I could get a kiss from her.
What the heck?
I did all that just because of a kiss? A flimsy kiss I can get from any girl I walk up to?
"But theirs won't be as nice as hers." My subconsciousness chipped in matter–of–factly and I'd be a fool to disagree.
And I never even got the kiss! I haven't even kissed her before—well, excluding the one that got her into a mess with her mother.
But because of this girl and her ultimatum, I took my studies seriously and got good grades on my tests. For the first time, I actually saw that my parents were excited and proud of me.
"Oh my goodness Alex, we're so proud of you." My mother said and wrapped me in a hug.
I arrived at their large mansion about ten minutes ago and after my mum served me her freshly baked brownies, which I didn't want to hurt her feelings by telling her it was way too bland, I decided to break the news about my grades to her and my dad.
"Yes Alex, we are proud of you." My father said and my mother disengaged from the hug, stepping away. "I am proud of you." He added, and the words sounded so foreign coming from him. I can't remember the last time he has ever said those words to me. In fact, I doubt if he has ever even told me those words before.
I am proud of you.
Those five-letter words traveled down my ears and settled deep in my chest, in a groove I didn't even know existed in my heart. Those five-letter words replayed themselves in my head like a mantra, alongside the proud smile that spread on my father's lips when he said them to me.
My father is actually proud of me. And I owe it all to Katherine.
I gave a little smile in response—I didn't want him to get all flattered seeing that I was shaken by his words. I didn't want it to get into his head.
"Honey, we should do something huge for him since he did so well in his tests." My mother suggested and my mind immediately caught the tag she used to refer to my father. Did she call him Honey?
My mother called my father honey. And here he was smiling about it like a teenager who just got their first kiss.
"I think we should do that when he passes his exams." He countered her idea—nicely if I may add, and not shutting her down completely and disrespectfully. He turned to face me, "Alex, if you pass your exams as well or even better than you did in your tests, I'll get you a brand new car, anyone you'd like."
I didn't really care about whatever they were going to offer me. What I was more concerned about was that my parents would always break into a fight whenever it came to issues with me. Every single time.
My father would scold me for being a bad kid and all that, and my mother would get defensive and protect me, telling my dad to take it easy on me. And then a whole fight would break out.
But here they were calling each other honey and had been in a civil conversation with each other for five solid minutes and hadn't ripped out each other's heads.
The funny thing is that they won't fight about me, they'd fight about one of their previous issues. The whole argument about me was just a catalyst to make them transfer their aggression and then the main reason for their disagreement would come up. Their incompatibility.
I was stunned. These people were actually cohabiting with each other. Did a miracle happen while I was away giving them space? Whatever happened, I'm eternally grateful and honestly glad that everything is going back to normal.
We ate dinner together, peacefully—no fights, no arguments, name-calling, or ceramic slashing. And then we had some of my mother's bland brownies for dessert. Then it was time for me to leave. I saw the downcast look on their faces when I was heading out, I knew they wanted nothing more than for me to move back in so we could be one family again.
But they need space to sort out their issues without me being there. Until then, things will have to be like this.
I got into my car and started the ignition, then drove out of the mansion. My parents waved me their goodbyes as I left and I promised to call them later. As I hit the road, my phone vibrated. It was a text message chime.
I picked up the phone and saw that it was from Katherine and I found myself smiling at that.
"Are you coming home tonight?"
The message read.
I thought we had agreed on giving each other space to make up for the things we missed for the past three days. Not that I have any problem with beating every fucking traffic light in sight so I can get home on time to be with her, but we agreed y'know.
The way my heart had fluttered when I saw the text message was a big concern to me. Why? It's because that was a clear indication that my plan had ultimately failed! While trying to play her, my heart started to slowly develop feelings for her…
I refuse to call those feelings love. I refuse to admit to it because that's something I never wanted or planned for in the first place. I'm scared of love.
And that's the reason why I'm going to end things with Katherine tonight. Yes, I had a change of plans and my new resolve is final. Whether or not I get to have sex with her, I'm going to call things off with her now.
I pressed hard on the accelerator paddle and sped off into the night.