“Are you sick, Ruru?” Russiana asked behind me. I was lying on the bed while covered with a blanket.
“No, I’m fine, sweety.”
“Are you sure? Your voice is hoarse, Ruru. You sound like an old woman.”
“No, don’t come near Ruru. I’m having a cold. You might catch it,” I reasoned when I felt Russiana take her body to the bed where I was lying on. I don’t want her to see my face. It was already swollen with tears last night.
Fortunately, Russiana was asleep with Thraia, so they didn’t notice my sudden arrival. When I remembered what happened last night, I couldn’t help but cry. I immediately restrained myself because my sister might hear my soft sobs.
“Okay. I will ask Thraia to make a soup for you.”
“Thank you, sweety,” I felt my little sister’s approach. I was about to cast her not go near me because her little lips suddenly touched the part of my head. Even though it was covered with a blanket, she still showers it with tiny kisses.
“I hope you’ll get well soon, Ruru.”
After Russiana left the room, I let my soft sobs escape from my mouth in silence. Touching my chest and just thinking about what I heard from Reign makes me sick and gives me too much pain.
I never thought that he will be connected to my parents’ death. I wouldn’t believe the message I’ve read, but it’s already been confirmed that it’s true because of the sent messages. Is this the reason why Reign let Sharmon go that day?
To make Sharmon owe him and keep this secret from me? How could Reign do this to me? It makes me sick. He’s the first man and the reason why I opened my heart and learn to love. Yet, he was the reason to break me into pieces.
My parents died a long time ago when Russian was still young. Since then, I can’t still forget how the news struck me that day. They were caught in a catastrophic car accident.
I bit my lower lips. I don’t want to remember that day, but yet, it’s coming back to my mind. I tried to get the thoughts that make me feel pain and let the drowsiness cast them away.
I woke up from the hands caressing my hair. When I opened my eyes, I saw Reign’s face staring at me while his eyes were sleepless.
“Your eyes are swollen.”
I was quickly thrown back from lying down, and I almost fell on the bed, but Reign immediately pulled me closer and hugged me. I can feel his rigorous heartbeat and the smell of alcohol coming from his breath.
I pushed him to no avail.
“Let’s stay at this position for a while,” Reign’s voice was begging, and I can’t help myself but softened. I tried not to struggle, but anger was building up inside my body.
Reign kissed my head, and I tried my very best to suppress my emotions to burst out.
“What are you doing here?” I firmly said.
“I want to talk with you.”
“For?”
“About the truth.”
I quickly pushed Reign, and the hug breaks off.
“Leave. I don’t want to hear about it,” I said while pointing to the door of my room. Reign’s blue eyes were staring at me, and there’s a vestige of pain from them.
“Please?” I don’t want to hear his voice begging. He moved and tried to reach for my hands, but I immediately took them away, “At least listen. Please, Ruchee?” I shrugged.
“Leave. I already told you last night that I don’t want to see your face anymore, so leave.”
I said and turned my eyes away from Reign, suppressing my tears from falling down. I don’t want to see and talk to him right now.
“Do you really want me to leave?” I bit my lips because of Reign’s soft baritone voice. He feels like crying, but he was just stopping himself not to. I want to laugh. Cry? How can someone ruthless like him shed tears?
“Haven’t you heard what I said?” I turned my face to him, wearing piercing eyes. I was trying to look displeased about his stubbornness, but the fact is, I really want to hear about the things he wanted to say to me.
“I will give you time,” he said. As I stared at him, his sleepless eyes were sad, and it was teary, “But don’t make it long. I can’t take you being mad at me.”
“Just go.”
Reign reached for me, and I did not have time to resist because his sudden movements were fast enough to react. He then gives me a tight hug.
“I love you.”
After he said those words, Reig left without looking back at me, but his fist was clenched. I was thinking if I did the right thing casting him out and not listening to his words. But I just prioritized my feelings.
I won’t be able to accept it, not now.
“Are you okay, miss?” I looked at the door with surprise. Thraia was standing as her worried eyes stared at me. I did not answer and look back at her. She walked towards me and sat on the bed.
“Did you know the truth?”
“Truth?” Thraia asked while being confused about what I mean.
“About Reign’s secret.”
“What secret, miss?”
“That he was involved in my parent’s death, and he’s the one who abducted me,” Thraia shrugged her head.
“Honestly, miss, the only secret we know is that the master was in love with someone named Ruchee three years ago.”
I stopped at what Thraia said and looked at her with confusion, “Three years ago? I did not meet Reign at that time. How can he be in love with me?”
“All I know is your name and the master’s feelings towards you. That’s the only secret we know inside the household.”
I did not answer because I don’t know how to say or construct the correct words.
“But miss,” Thraia reached for my hands and gently squeeze them, “Try to listen to master’s words. He’s been good to you from the very beginning. I don’t know about what he did to you that made you something like this but,” she moved her other hand to my chest, feeling the beating, “try to follow what your heart shouts. Not today, but think about it. Listening will be the solution of distrust.”
After Thraia left me dumbfounded, I was thinking deeply about what she said. I grasp my chest. Maybe it’s not wrong to listen to Reign’s words. He has a reason but not now. I can’t still face him.
I trusted Reign. I thought that I already know anything about him, but I was wrong. With that, I want to heal first from his secret. I need time to think about it.
I’m not planning to run away. I just need space for everything and ease this pain inside my heart caused by the person I love.