Chapter 58: The egg
There was nothing more she adored than her three story home where she'd raised her children and made so many memories with her husband. It felt so good to be back, a sense of relief consumed her as she walked around. There were no changes what so ever, she was glad Austin had been decent enough to not change anything. If it were up to Austin he would have preferred to have more empty spaces and less furniture. Austin carried his mothers bags to the guest room. Seeing as he had occupied the largest room in the house the minute they left. She did not mind. She was simply happy to be back.
"Where's my German porcelain set...?" His mother asked looking around the hallway overlooking the butterfly double stairs. "It was a wedding gift from my papa..." She said in a thick German accent. Austin did not know if it was funny or upsetting. Regardless, his mother being German had always been funny. She had her own manner of doing things.
"I wouldn't know..." Austin replied pursing his lips.
"Odd that it would simply disappear, you know how much it meant to me. It's the only souvenir, I have as a reminder of home."
"...you should visit, you sound as if you miss it." Austin added trying to change the subject.
"I do miss Germany a lot." She admitted. "I reckon after being here for so long, I will fail to articulate my home language properly."
"Why did you leave if you loved it so much?"
"Because... I fell in love...and I was happy here with your father..."
"Was it worth it?"
"What is it with all the questions?" She smiled. "You were never one to be interested in matters of the heart."
"...nothing mother. It was simply curiosity."
"...well allow me to freshen up then we can have a quick lunch together. Call Merrigold, I have some new garments for her. I still remember how she adored my French capote."
"...ofcourse..."
"Thank you sweetheart."
"You're welcome mother. It's good to have you back. Home was never home without your presence."
"Oh hush, you will certainly make me cry again."
Austin chuckled as he walked away. He asked one of the workers if they had finally released Thomas as he had instructed them to. They replied yes. Austin felt at ease. He would not have liked for his mother to find Thomas in such a state. Austin had wished Thomas death countless times but at the thought of his mothers presence, he suddenly had a change of heart and hoped he was well enough to put on a show.
Thomas and Merrigold were having a conversation as she cleaned his wounds. Continuously apologizing for the grief she had caused him.
"I only care for your wellbeing Merri nothing more not even myself."
Merrigold gave him a smile but it didn't reach her eyes.
"This is all my fault."
"Never say that Merri! It's not your fault he is deranged."
"But I led him to act that way when I told him to stay away from me.... and I've not been quite honest with you which is why I'm here."
Thomas seemed concerned. He had never seen Merri act this way. She seemed so down, as if she was trying to put on a face that she was alright when she wasn't.
"Which is why you're here?"
"Yes...uhm...otherwise I would have never came to see you."
"Are you implying you do not care enough for me or my well-being?" Thomas questioned a little confused and hurt.
"I do, I care about you a lot which is why, I'd rather stay away from you. Let you be happy, I do not want this constantly back and forth and quarreling between you and I and that man."
"What is that supposed to mean?" Thomas mumbled putting his hand on top of Merri's and giving it a tight squeeze.
"I slept with him multiple times. Probably more than you, willingly..."
"...I know that.." he replied.
"I've lied to you and I'm tired of lying."
"That is all in the past!"
"No Thomas please listen to me for a second. You deserve to be happy. You can not continue wasting your time on me. I'm a train wreck. You're a good person. I've only been a selfish person who kept pulling you in while being with another man. This mess is all my fault but I'm going to fix it."
"By being with him? Are you choosing him over me...?"
Merrigold sighed loudly.
"I will not be with you or with him. I will not be with anyone. I'm not picking any person please.."
"Then what is the meaning of all this?"
"I need you to give love a chance with someone else..."
"Never!" Thomas said almost immediately. "I love you and I can never see myself loving anyone else more than I already do with you."
"It's for the best."
"Not for my best or your best. What are you trying to imply? That you love him instead?"
"It has nothing to do with him. Please listen Thomas and stop being stubborn. Go be happy, you can never have that with me. I need you to forget about all this and try to move on."
"...are you trying to hurt me? Because it's working." Thomas muttered with teary eyes.
"I—"
"I thought I told you that I forgave you."
"I know."
"Even if you admitted to continuing seeing him after he made you lose our child."
Merrigold felt in distress. A reminder that here she was yet again expecting.
"I'm sorry..."
"It won't change anything. We have already made it this far, why give up now?"
"Because I'm tired of all this crossfire."
"Just say you do not want me anymore." Thomas hissed roughly pushing Merrigold's hand away. "You love him!"
"I'm offended that you would imply such a thing. After everything he has put me through not even love is enough. You saw what he did to me Thomas, in any right state of mind who would chose to be with a man like him. Who would be sane enough to want a man who threatens to rape them and does it soberly and with no remorse. He lays his hands on me when he is angry. I've grown accustomed to his cold claps. He degrades me and constantly reminds me that I'm worth nothing and that he has every right to treat me the way he does. I could never love someone like him... for you to imply that I do is just as hurtful."
Thomas was speechless.
"...so what now? what if you're pregnant..."
Merrigold looked aside. "I doubt..."
"You will be tied to him for life. There would be no way you could ever be away from him. Suppose that's what he intended when he raped you..." Thomas added thoughtfully.
Tied to him for life.
Oh God. Merri thought.
"I'm not, even if it were he wouldn't be the only man in question..."
"Excuse me!" Thomas gasped.
"Did they—"
Merrigold smiled. "It really doesn't matter, you need to worry about healing getting better."
"No Merri!"
"It was only one other man but it does not matter."
"It does stop saying it doesn't, is your brother aware?"
"No no no... Thomas please don't ruin his peace. I'm tired of worrying him. He needs to focus on his wife and little girl. He can not take care of me for the rest of his life."
"It's not a burden or duty, it's because he cares.."
"No, do not tell him."
"He will only be upset with me when he finds out."
"Please..."
"Fine."
"How sure are you that you're not pregnant—"
"Please Thomas can you stop it! What is this your obsession with me getting pregnant. I'm not. If you weren't aware I suffered heavy bleeding when I miscarried and by now I must be barren. It is very unlikely that I'd fall pregnant again." She replied. "You would not understand a woman's body!"
"...oh...I'm sorry to here that."
"It is alright. That is why you need to be with another. Seek love else where and be happy. Even if I died, I want you to know that I'd be happy if you moved on."
Scrunching his face. "What are you implying?"
"...hypothetically speaking."
"Are you dying? Are you sick?"
"No no no, I'm as health as can be. I was only speaking and making examples."
"I'm not fond of your examples, please do not call death."
"I'm not... anyways...uhm congratulations."
"For what?"
"With Faith..."
Thomas demeanor immediately changed.
"Is this why you're leaving me? It was a mistake. I was going to tell you, I swear to God. I would never hide anything from you—"
"I'm not upset. It would be hypocritical considering I did worse to you and more damage."
"I still love you."
"Please do not say that..."
"It's exactly what I feel... I'm sure Austin feels just as much for you with a sprinkle of obsession."
"Can we not speak of him..."
"I'm sorry..."
Merrigold let out a sigh, this was not going anywhere.
"He loves you Merrigold and I hate that he does. I hate that I can see it. I hate him. His love has turnt into obsessive ethics. It's not right."
"He gave my daily tasks to someone else."
"But why?"
"I suppose it's to punish me. Now, I merely do nothing in that house perhaps I will return to the commune. He has not said much about what I will be doing now. I'm simply a piece of furniture waiting to get raped."
"How awful, I'm sorry Merri... I wish there was more I could do."
Merri smiled. "It's alright, you've already done enough."
"God will make him pay. God will avenge for you!"
"I hope so... for now please stir away from him. I wouldn't want anything happening to you. On my part I will try to please him and not get on his bad side."
"You're going to continue sleeping with him?" Thomas questioned.
"Not for long..." she mumbled. "If he questions of it then I have to for peace sake."
"I hate that you have to live this way."
Suddenly there was a knock. Faith with food. It smelt heavenly, Thomas stomach grumbled.
"Hello Merri." Faith said nicely.
"Hello.." Merrigold replied, she felt ashamed. How had she not thought to bring Thomas food? How had she been selfish to come here for her own endeavors? How had she—
This is why Faith deserves Thomas, she thought. She cares for him. Without her, he would have starved to death while she was being selfish and tying her stomach.
"I'm so glad you're doing well..." Faith added.
"I'm trying... and thank you Faith for everything."
She smiled and caressed his overgrown facial hair. "I wouldn't have wanted the father of my child dying..."
Thomas flinched at her touch after hearing her words. He was astounded.
"...you can not be serious..."
Faith smiled. "My mother said my nose has grown awfully big, it must be a boy."
"I'm really happy for you Faith." Merri said in the back.
"Thank you, aunty Merri."
"You knew??" Thomas asked Merri.
She nodded.
"I'm sorry Merri, I'm really—"
"Please Thomas don't be ridiculous, we should be celebrating not sulking. I know how much you've always wanted a boy..." Merri added.
Thomas smiled a little. "Uh..I— I'm going to be a father...huh? Again..."
"Yes." Faith told him.
"I suppose everything happens for a reason, this child is a blessing. Nothing else, I suppose I could have really used some good news in a time like this.."
"You will be a great father Thomas." Merri encouraged.
"...I'm sorry you're barren..." he muttered.
"She is barren?" Faith asked, mockingly.
"It's fine." Merrigold told them. "I have to return before he looks for me and takes it out on everyone."
"Uh Merri?" Faith called.
"His mother is here. He is acting a tad bit sane."
"Mrs Cunningham is here?" She said clearly shocked. Looking down at the two jerseys she had on, she was afraid. His mother would definitely see it. This was her end. Things were simply becoming worse and worse.
Returning back to the house. Mrs. Cunningham engulfed her in a big hug. She threw some weight comments here and there but overall she was nice as always. Merrigold was forced to sit at the table with Austin opposite her. She fumbled with her fingers and stared at her empty plate and cutlery that was set out.
"What have I missed dear?"
"...uhm nothing much, same old same old." She replied. Mrs Cunningham was making them food. She had told Mrs Brown, Merri and Austin to sit down while she prepared lunch. She had give the other ladies some time off.
"And you Austin..?"
"Not much."
"Oh goodness..." Mrs Cunningham screamed near cooker. Everyone came to her aid worried for the woman. When they approached her, she had broken an egg. They were all confused.
"Mother?" Austin questioned.
"We're having twins look look look, a double york in one egg. When I was pregnant the same thing happened to me. Your sister must be pregnant oh wow... I'm so overjoyed this is exactly what this family needed. Here we were assuming you'd be the one to have twins... I know you're not fond of children. It must be your sister and Edward. I ought to visit them with a baby gift."
Austin rolled his eyes going back to his seat. "Here you go again with your superstitions mother it's simply an egg."
Mrs Brown stared at Merrigold. Merrigold felt uncomfortable. If she left, they'd assumed. She had to stay sat and smiling. Her heart was beating so fast. She did not feel at ease. More so with everyone questioning her choice of clothing.