"A smart person will give you smart answers, but a wise person will ask you smart questions." - Unkown.
***************
Heaven's special qualities were actually of disadvantage to Lucifer. Zamiel remembered when he tried to get into her mind while he was in the coffin. It had been difficult to do that. She fought back and as an ancient even with her fighting back, it should still have been easy for him to get inside her head. But it wasn't.
He remembered that he could only watch her from a safe distance at first. He couldn't get closer, but then her curiosity opened the doors for him. Somewhere deep down she had wanted to see him, had been curious to know him, and that is when he was able to get inside her head.
Lucifer was of course more skilled when it came to manipulation and getting inside people's minds. But Zamiel guessed that he must have faced some struggle as well. There must be an explanation to why he hadn't been able to manipulate her so far.
Usually someone as young as her wouldn't have been difficult for him. She was at the age where people looked for more in life, wanted more from life. She was at the age where she doubted herself and tried to find out where she fit in to the world. Lucifer could have used all that against her, but Zamiel already knew that wouldn't work. Because more than anything, Heaven cared for people.
She cared for her loved ones. She had no selfishness or greed inside of her that could be used against her. If there was one thing that could be used against her, it would be her love for him and her family. But love only behaved as a weakness.
Love itself wasn't a weakness. Fear was a weakness. The fear of losing those you love.
Love itself was the ultimate strength. Lucifer was fighting someone who held so much love in their heart, and love covered many sins.
"What is special about you is that you have a strong mind and a gentle heart." He told her.
Heaven smiled widely while shaking her head at him. She believed he was only praising or charming her.
"I don't have a strong mind and I am not sure if having a gentle heart is something special."
"You have both, and having them at the same time is what makes you special."
"Is that it?" She asked.
He chuckled. "Did you hope for something else?"
She shrugged. "I don't know what I was hoping for."
"Do you think your grandfather wants you for the sole reason to rule? Or do you think he wants something else?" He asked.
Heaven was quiet for a moment before she spoke. "I don't know what he wants. I don't understand why he needs me to rule when he has other children. I have been thinking about it and I think he wants something else."
Zamiel felt proud that she thought differently. "What could that other thing be?" He asked, pushing her to think.
She became quiet again, her thoughts drifting away. "Maybe he just wants to have someone from our family on his side. When I was little, my family refused to follow him. Maybe he wants to show that someone is willing to follow him."
Zamiel frowned. "You think he wants some kind of revenge?"
Heaven shrugged. "Not revenge. Perhaps, he just want to prove that it is not that bad to follow him by tempting me to do it."
Zamiel became more confused than before. This could be a family thing that he didn't understand yet.
"Is it really impossible for grandpa to leave his mission and be with us? Doesn't the mate bond affect him?" She asked.
"It probably does. But how much? Does he have a heart that cares when the bond connects him to his mate? Or does he merely feel the connection, but he doesn't care? It is hard to know."
Zamiel knew that the bond was attached to feelings. For it to be effective, feelings had to be involved. The bond itself couldn't create feelings. It only strengthened and confirmed the ones you had. Did Lucifer have feelings? Zamiel suspected he did, but maybe not enough.
Suddenly Heaven grimaced in pain and held her stomach. "Heaven?" Zamiel reached for her, but she flinched and drew back from his touch. She quickly got out of bed and distanced herself from him.
Zamiel got out of bed confused, but before she could approach her, she held her hand out to stop him. "Zamiel, please. Don't come closer." Her voice was pained, and she pleaded.
"Why?" He asked, feeling torn. He wanted to rush to her, but from the way she looked at him, terrified, he was afraid she would run away if he did.
"Please, Zamiel. Just listen to me. Leave. I am hurting." She wrapped her arms around herself and backed against the wall.
Zamiel felt anger bubble inside of him. He suddenly wanted to punch something but stormed out of the room instead, unable to see her in pain anymore. While walking back to the carriage, he thought of how much he wanted to kill Lucifer. If that was only possible, he would risk his life doing so.
Lord help him and the people around him because they shivered as he passed by. He knew he was giving off that cold energy that made people freeze. He needed to calm down or he would end up killing someone.
The blood in his veins was boiling, but the heat wasn't enough to make him stop from turning autumn into winter. His hands were clenched and his eyes probably gleamed the brightest silver.
When he walked outside, he felt the cold breeze against his face, but it didn't calm him. He had to tell himself repeatedly to calm down.
Zamiel wasn't angry because she told him to leave. He was angry because he had to see her like that, knowing his presence somehow inflicted the pain and he couldn't do anything about it. He was angry because he couldn't protect the one he loved once again.
"Zamiel."
He took a deep breath when he saw Irene approaching him. He didn't want to release his anger on her.
"Are you going home already?" She asked, coming to stand in front of him.
"Yes." He replied.
"I didn't get the chance to thank you earlier for your advice. You were right. I am letting hatred blind me and it is stopping me from helping my granddaughter the way I should."
Zamiel was really not in the mood, and it was probably visible. He just wanted to say 'good that you know' but he bit his tongue.
"I felt like what I said about Heaven upset you." She continued.
Did it? Maybe it did. Or maybe he just didn't like the way she thought of Heaven. He had expected her to know more about her granddaughter and to put more effort into helping her.
"It is sad that you had to protect her from me." She added.
"I was not protecting her from you. I was defending her. I know you love Heaven, but you do understand that your thoughts are concerning to me. You seem torn and I understand that but I can't sympathise with you since this is about Heaven's Safety. Heaven is my priority and if she not yours in this case then I am afraid we are on apposing sides."
The only reason Zamiel was polite to Heaven's family was because of her, but if they didn't prioritize her the way she prioritized them, then there was no need for him to be polite.
Irene smiled at him. "I am glad she has you, and I don't mind you protecting her from me as well. You should protect her from everyone that seems like a threat."
Zamiel knew she was doubting herself, and what she might do that put everyone in danger. "Heaven loves you dearly. I hope you stay strong for her."
Heaven would be devastated if her grandmother made a bad decision.
Irene nodded with a weak smile. He knew she was doing her best and he couldn't comprehend how hard that must be.
"And if you need to talk to someone…" Was he really doing this? "I'll listen." He said.
Her smile widened. "Thank you. I thought I would be upset that you could hear my thoughts, but I feel less burdened now that someone else knows."
He nodded.
Irene always felt strange every time she talked to Zamiel. There was something about his demeanor that she liked so much. She had liked him from the beginning, before she even knew him, and just from the things she had heard about him.
Today he had opened her eyes to the things that she had been suppressing and denying. It was the realization that made her sad and not him.
Earlier she had seen his gaze harden when she told him she worried for Heaven. He didn't like that and she could understand.
While she expressed worry for Heaven, what had she done really to help her granddaughter? She hadn't even tried. At that moment he stood up for his mate. He told her that Heaven had her priorities straight, reminding her that she was the one confused.
It was a polite way of putting someone in their place. The demon knew how to speak.
While she doubted Heaven in that moment, he showed utmost trust in her. Irene knew she had to do better as a grandmother, and she was glad that Zamiel didn't judge her, even though she felt ashamed of her own thoughts. Maybe that was why she liked him and felt strangely comfortable with him.
He always surprised her with his choice of words and his way of thinking. She could see the goodness that Heaven spoke of in his eyes, but he also made it clear that if he had to turn bad for Heaven, then he would. Her mother had told her once that when good people turn bad, they turn really bad. Hopefully nothing of that sort would happen because behind those disturbingly calm silver eyes, there was a hidden threat. A dangerous storm.