"The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. The first to forget is the happiest"
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"What slowed down her healing?" Zamiel asked.
"I am not sure. I just overheard her speak to father. She said she found the thing that slowed down her healing ability. She would kill herself with it. Give herself a severe injury that would take longer to heal. If she died before she could heal, then she would achieve her goal." Ilyas explained.
His explanation made both of them frown. Demons could only die by a stab in the spine, but they could heal from any other injury. Ancients couldn't die by a stab in the spine, but any severe injury could kill them if their healing slowed down. And only one thing could make their healing slow down. Or one person.
No wonder ancients were considered immortal. To find that one thing among everything else in the world seemed impossible. That is why ancients went into deep slumber instead of chasing that one thing that could end their life.
"How old were you then?" Zamiel asked.
"Sixteen." Ilyas said then frowned. "Are you planning on moving on?" He looked almost concerned.
Zamiel chuckled. "No. I plan to stay for a very long time." He said.
"Is Heaven in some danger?" He asked.
He understood why Ilyas was concerned. Zamiel had told him to guard Heaven closely. Keep an eye on her all the time and pay closer attention to find anything odd. With the nightmares going on, Lucifer might already decide to take his next step, and Zamiel wanted to be prepared so he could protect Heaven.
It seemed like danger followed the people he loved everywhere. Maybe he was bad luck.
"She might be. I'll take over now. You may go rest." He told him.
Ilyas nodded. "I'll take my leave then." He said standing up and just like him he vanished into smoke.
Zamiel leaned back on the couch. That Heaven could hurt him made him worry for Heaven and not for himself. He had gone through worse than death.
He was not afraid of death. Death should be afraid of him.
What he feared was losing Heaven. To fail to protect the woman he loved, again.
"Zamiel!" Suddenly Heaven shrieked his name, startling him.
Within a second, he was by her side.
She sat on his bed, eyes wide with fear and her face pale and covered with sweat. When she saw him, she jumped out of bed and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tightly.
"You are alright." She breathed, her voice shaky.
She pulled back, panicking. She touched his body everywhere, as if making sure he was whole. "You are alright." She kept repeating.
Zamiel grabbed her wrists to stop her. "Heaven. I am alright." He assured her.
She looked up at him with those fearful eyes. "But… I just killed you." She said.
He smiled at her. "It is alright. You do it all the time. Every time you kiss me, hold me or just smile at me, I die. And then you bring me back to life doing the same."
Her eyes softened, and she sobbed. "It is not the time to be romantic." She said.
He drew her into his arms and held her close. "Any time with you is the time to be romantic."
He stroke her hair and she wrapped her arms around his waist. "I don't want to lose you." She said, her face buried in his chest.
"You won't."
Zamiel already knew what her nightmares were about, and it was something they needed to talk about.
Heaven was silent for a moment, her heartbeat slowly calming down, but then in the silence her stomach growled loudly. Zamiel could feel her shrink in his arms. She was embarrassed.
"Let's eat." He said before picking her up with ease.
Heaven was surprised. "What are you doing?" She asked as he carried her to the dining room. "I can walk."
"And I can carry you." He said simply.
When they arrived at the dining room, he sat her down on a chair. She still looked tired. Even the little moment she was asleep, the nightmares interrupted her.
Zamiel sat next to her and ordered Helen to serve them food.
"Thank you. I am starving." She admitted.
"How was your mission?" He asked while they waited.
She smiled. "I thought I failed, but maybe I didn't." She shrugged. "I regret nothing. I learned a lot, but I don't think father is proud."
"I am sure he is. But he is a father. Being worried comes before being proud."
Having been a father himself, Zamiel could understand Lucian. Ruling was never easy, and knowing the devil's plan made him probably worry even more. A fight between a family would leave everyone hurt.
Heaven sighed. "I hope so." She said then she looked at him as if remembering something.
"You wanted to tell me something." She reminded.
Zamiel looked at her closely. She was still hurt, so he didn't know if it would be good to bring up Rose now, but maybe this would allow her to talk about it instead of keeping it all to herself.
Then he had to tell her about the nightmares. He never spoke to her much about her grandfather, but the only time they spoke about him it seemed like she hoped he would be better. If she still had hope, then what he was about to tell her would disappoint her.
"Yes. There was a woman who came here. Her name was Rose. She was sent as a gift. I sent her back." He said.
He didn't want to go into details that would make her uncomfortable. He just wanted her to know that he wasn't keeping it a secret.
"You know who sent her." She said looking down at her hands. "You don't have to be kind and hide it."
He was not kind. He made Rose tell the truth, which caused a fight between them. Even if he did it to prevent a bigger fight, that might unable their friendship to ever be restored, she was hurt at the moment.
"Yes I know, but I was not kind. I don't like your friend. I don't like him near you, I don't like him touching you and treating you the way he did. I don't like him disrespecting you. He might be your friend, but you are my woman. I hate to see you mistreated."
He was not an angel. It would be a lie to say Zarin's actions didn't upset him. The only reason he endured and stayed respectful was because Heaven called him a friend. Had he been someone else, he would have made him crawl.
Heaven looked at him, surprised. Maybe because of the way he spoke. He was not the type to let his emotions control his speech, but this time he let it out.
"I still think you are kind." She finally said.