As I showed her the car, my cute little daughter tilted her head and asked,
"Papa, what kind of carriage is this? Where's the horse?"
God. She was so innocent.
I smiled. At least she takes after me... not that damn lizard queen.
I crouched down to explain. "This is a modern carriage, sweetheart. It runs on fuel and frustration, not horses."
Now Erza—no kidding—she learned how to drive in twenty-five minutes. Twenty-five. On the other hand, I spent two months, wrecked the car twelve times, and collected thirty-two penalties like Pokémon badges.
I think I officially hate dragons now.
We were cruising down the highway—13 kilometers to go before we hit the zoo.
Elena sat in the back seat, her face glued to the window. Erza sat beside her, arms folded like she was guarding royalty.
"Look, Mama! A dragon's flying in the sky!" Elena pointed excitedly at a plane overhead.
Erza narrowed her eyes. "Interesting... how weak. It has no magical presence, nor physical strength. Barely a whelp."
I choked. "That's... an airplane."
She blinked. "Why do humans in your world use such strange combinations of magic and mechanics?"
I sighed. "It's not magic. It's science. We use the laws of the world to make things work—combine methods and build tools."
Elena tilted her head. "What does that mean, Papa? I bet Mama doesn't get it either!"
I tried my best to explain. "Okay, imagine raw meat. It's just... there, right? Now cook it with fire, season it a bit, and boom—it becomes something better. That's how science works. We take basic stuff, mix them, and create new things."
Erza nodded slowly. "Hmm... that's clever. I never thought mortals could think like that."
I smirked. "We're smart, you know. Maybe that's why gods gave us short lives. They probably got scared we'd evolve too fast if we lived longer."
I felt the temperature in the car rise.
Erza turned her head toward me, eyes glowing faintly. Her voice was sharp.
"So... you're saying we live thousands of years because we're dumb?"
I panicked. "Wait—no! That's not what I meant! I was just—uh, just saying maybe the gods were, you know, like... cautious?"
She leaned in slightly. "Cautious about you. Not us
I was sweating like I ran the 13 kilometers myself.
"See, my beautiful dragon queen, you've misunderstood my humble—very humble—words," I mumbled, hands gripping the steering wheel like my life depended on it. Because at this point, it probably did.
Elena giggled from the back seat.
Yeah. Papa was definitely in trouble.
Not gonna lie, my head still hurts.
Because I made a lame joke. Apparently, dragons don't do sarcasm. Noted.
"Papa, look! The zoo is so big!" Elena pressed her face to the window.
"Look! There's a talking bear! And a giraffe!"
I squinted. "That's a costume, sweetie. They're just here to welcome us."
She bounced in her seat like she was going to explode from excitement.
She wasn't wrong, though. The entrance was massive. And the map out front? It looked like something out of a fantasy RPG. Icons everywhere—lions, cafes, gift shops, jungle rides.
Oh, and apparently, half of this world's romcoms were filmed here. Of course they were.
Then Erza stepped out of the car.
Wearing jeans and a plain top, she still managed to radiate queen-level aura like she was ready to declare war.
No horns, no crown—but the way people stared, you'd think she brought a dragon army with her.
She glanced around, narrowed her eyes at the giraffe mascot, and whispered,
"Is that a beastkin servant?"
I almost choked. "That's just a guy in a suit."
She blinked, then nodded solemnly like she'd just learned some ancient mortal wisdom.
"Hmph. Mortals disguise themselves as animals for entertainment. Curious."
Meanwhile, Elena was already halfway out of the car, jumping up and down like her tiny boots were spring-loaded.
"Come on, come on! Let's go see the tigers!"
Erza gently held her hand, looking oddly soft for a war-born dragon queen.
"You must stay close. If any creature dares to approach you, I shall burn them where they stand."
"Elena's going to pet a goat, not invade a kingdom," I muttered.
And just like that, our weird little family stepped through the gates of the biggest zoo in the country—me, a former nobody, holding a map I couldn't read, trailing behind a dragon queen with homicidal
overprotectiveness, and a daughter who thought every bird was a baby phoenix.
As we stepped through the entrance, I could already feel eyes on us—and not just because of Elena bouncing around like she'd had three energy drinks.
Near the gate, a small crew was packing camera equipment.
"Ugh, the actress canceled again?" a guy in a half-buttoned shirt groaned.
"Yeah, the shoot's doomed without her," the worker said. "We needed someone hot for the front page of this month's Zoo Lovers Magazine."
"Guess I'll do a solo shoot then," said the model—a blonde guy with his collar popped and sunglasses pushed up like he thought he was God's gift to women. He turned around...
...and then he saw Erza.
His shades slid down his nose in slow motion. His jaw? Basically on the floor.
His assistant blinked. "Just some random visitor, but... she's got major confidence. Like queen-level aura or something."
He smirked. "I'll make her mine. Find out her name, her favorite food, what flowers she likes, where she lives, and what kind of music she listens to.
I'm going full romcom mode, baby."
Inner monologue (over-the-top sparkly filter in his brain):
If I marry her, my status will hit MAX. I'll be unstoppable—power, fame, beauty... the perfect power couple! Mwahaha—
Then Erza turned and glared in his direction, and the guy actually flinched like he got hit with a death spell.
I leaned in and whispered, "Careful, buddy. That one doesn't do romance. She does war crimes."
Aaron adjusted his sunglasses with a slow, practiced motion, eyes locked on Erza like he'd just spotted a mythical treasure.
"Aaron," he whispered to himself, "looks like you're finally facing a challenge... someone beyond even your legendary charm."
His assistant blinked. "Wait, what?"
He clenched his fist with dramatic resolve, the wind suspiciously picking up around him.
"No... I can't back down."
Then, louder—and with way too much passion for someone standing outside a zoo—
"I want you, Hotie. I'll make you mine!"
Nearby kids stared. A balloon popped. I coughed into my hand, pretending I didn't hear any of that.
Erza? She didn't even glance his way. Too busy watching a pigeon walk funny.
And that's when I knew...
This dude had no idea what kind of dragon-level storm he was about to unleash on himself.
As we walked past the giraffe statue, Elena tugged on my sleeve and looked up with those big sparkly eyes.
"Papa, look! Some people are putting our story in their collection! I love them!"
I smiled. "Yes, I see that, Elena."
Erza folded her arms, glancing at the sky with a smirk. "Hmph. So... they are interested in our story."
Then, Elena looked down sadly.
"But Papa... some of them don't even notice me. Maybe Mama and Elena's story isn't that good..."
"Hey, hey, no no no," I quickly said, kneeling down to her.
"They're just busy with school, work, life stuff. They'll add us to collection one day. I believe in them."
Elena gave a small smile.
She held my hand tighter.
And somewhere behind me, Erza whispered,
"...If they don't collect us by tomorrow, I might burn a The city."
Elena's watching... don't break her tiny heart!
Add to your collection, drop a comment, and tell her she's the real MVP!