Jaxon
I would be lying if I said I didn't feel anything after I walked out.
I would be lying if I said I didn't tell Landon that she didn't want us in her life.
I would be lying if I told him the truth about what happen.
I would be lying if I said he heard instead of Greyson about what happen.
So basically I told Landon that she said that she never wants to see any of us in her life anymore, and said that if one walks in right now she would call security right away.
He hasn't found out yet though. But just the matter of times before my lies would catch up and bite me in the ass.
But what could I have said?
That I'm never going to see her again and live on with my life with out her?
Yeah....I should've said that instead.
But I know Landon, if he likes it he would try to keep it. He's done it with Nia, but she's dead now. Nothing I can do.
It's been two weeks since I walked out of that room. I paid for her bill and that's all I've done for her since then.
"You ready?" He asked behind me while I looked at myself in my mirror while I pulled up my black tie.
"Yeah." I mumbled. I looked at myself and almost punched the mirror because I look pathetic. I have bags under my eyes from not be able to sleep. And my eyes are slightly red and lost the light in them. I could tell Landon sees it but doesn't say anything. I sighed and walked over to my dresser and picked up my sunglasses and placed them on, following after Landon out the house.
I walked towards the passenger side and climbed in the car. He walked towards the driver side and climbed in too. I click my seat belt and looked out the window. I heard the car start and start to move. My heart picked up slightly because of what's going to happen next.
It took a good twenty minutes to get there. But once we were there, I sighed when I saw no one there expect for her casket. A memorial was surrounded with flower of her smiling and I couldn't stop the tear that fell from under my glasses.
I climbed out, not waiting for Landon and making my way towards her coffin. My jaw clenched and only thought about her while walking towards her. How she smiled right before she left me. I continue to walk till I was standing right in front of her coffin. It was closed, and thank god for that, because if not I would have climbed right in there and cry on her cold lifeless body.
I placed my hand on the warm wood from the sun beaming down on it. And felt my heart ache when I made contact.
That would be the last time I would see her.
I took a step back, letting Landon say some words before she would be six feet under ground.
I wiped my eyes and looked up, watching the clear blue sky. I hope she's now looking after me. "Now you're at peace ma." I said still looking up. I looked back at her casket and see Landon wiping a tear away and stepping back.
I walked back towards him and I hear him take in a breath and exhale slowly. I place a hand on his shoulder while the hand wipes the tear that seems to always fall out. "She was a good women. Didn't deserve all of this crap." He mumbled while I stayed quiet. I walked forwards and slowly bent down and placed a kiss on the coffin and took a step back.
"Bye ma."
****
By the time me and Landon were done placing her in the dirt we walked back towards the car and this time I chose to drive.
"Where to?" He asked while getting in and adjusting the seat for his long ass legs. I had to adjust mine too but I made the seat straighter then how Landon had it bent back.
"Any where really, we have no where to go. I'm was just thinking to go to my house and drink and maybe wake up with a hangover the next morning." I said while I started to drive out of the cemetery.
"Oh, well...do you want me there?" He asked while he shifted in his seat. I struggled my shoulders,"if you want. Doesn't matter with me."
"I can always stay at my apartment Jaxon, just say you don't want me there." I looked to him and see him staring at me. I stared back at the road, "I didn't say I didn't want you there Landon. You're always invited. But if you feel like you're not welcome then don't show. I can always drop you off."
"My car is at your house."
"So you're going to leave then?"
"Yeah....sounds like you need time by yourself."
I chuckled because he's sounds so awkward, "okay. Let me just go to the store."
****
I pulled up from the gas station and looked over to him. "Do you want anything?"
He looked over to me and smiled, "the usually."
I rolled my eyes but smiled. Fûckin stupid mother fûcker.
I walked in while the bell chimed above me. The old man looked up from counting his money from the front counter but looked back down. I stood straighter and walked over to the back and picked up some beer. I picked up a 24 pack because I know I'm going to be drinking more then 12. I walked over to the candy section and picked up that fûcker his sour patch. I was going to get myself some chips but that's when I heard the voices.
"Greyson, I don't want to be here. My stomach hurts from the stitches and I just want to be under the covers in your room." She mumbled.
"Shut up would you! You need junk food in your system for the cure of a broken heart. So now, what chips? Hot Cheetos or cheese Cheetos?"
"I can't have hot things for awhile Greyson. Doctors orders."
"Shît. Forgot."
I was already power-walking towards the cash registers and quickly placing the beer and the candy on the counter. Forget the chips.
"Fine. Let's go to a different store. Sonic? Some ice creams?"
"Sure."
I heard their voices from afar and I was tempted to pull out my gun for the old man to hurry up. He would scan the candy but have to type in the numbers because it couldn't pick up the code. By the time he was about to say the price I threw the money at him. I picked up the beer and the candy and was rushing to get out.
I heard him gasp, "ummm, let's go check the chips again."
"Why? Let's go. I want ice cr-"
I felt their eyes on my back and I froze. My hand was on the handle to push open the door but that's when she spoke. "Ja-Jaxon?"
I closed my eyes and made myself push open the door and rush towards the car.
I open the door quickly and tossed him the beer and his candy.
He groaned when it landed on his stomach but I was already pulling out and speeding towards my house.