I HAVEN'T seen Charlie much in the past months. After I told him that I'd stay married to Gideon, he seemed to have avoided me.
I heard from Amelia that he had taken on a project in Alaska.
"I need to talk to you." He looked at me. I was already dressed for my flight.
"I have a flight in two hours, Charlie."
"I know. I won't take long, Bianca."
I bit my lower lip as I invited him inside the house.
"Mom said you're going back to New York," he said as he sat on the sofa. His eyes went to my luggage near the sofa. "You already talked to her." It was a statement.
I took the seat across from him. "Yeah. I already told Amelia that Gideon and I didn't really love each other. And that I'll be filing a divorce once Gideon wakes up."
"You didn't tell her about us," Charlie said, his eyes on me.
"No." I swallowed. "Amelia didn't need to know the real reason why Gideon married me. I can't hurt her." I gave him a small smile. "Let's just keep that to ourselves, Charlie. You, Gideon, and I."
He sighed. Then nodded. "What are your plans now?"
I noticed how his eyes wandered around the house. Aside from the Monet painting displayed on the wall, there's nothing much on this house. No portrait. No flower vase. No personal touch. It's empty. Dull. Just like Gideon and I's marriage.
I gave him a small smile. "I had come to realize that even after I lost my baby… I still need to go on with my life."
It had been three months since it happened but the pain was still there.
I didn't think the pain would go away soon. It would forever stay in my heart.
"I can't just stay here and wait until Gideon wakes up."
"Or dies." Charlie breathed.
I didn't know why a shiver ran down my spine with the thought of Gideon leaving the world.
I hated him for ruining my life… but I never wished him dead.
I cleared my throat. "I've decided to continue my life in New York. Go back to my previous job."
"I'm sorry, I needed to stay away for a while." He looked at me, his eyes full of frustration. "I can't bear to see you looking after Gideon with Mom in the hospital after learning the truth."
"You have nothing to apologize for, Charlie. I understand."
"But now, I'm happy you're finally leaving." He reached for my hand. "I could go with you, Bianca… I could stay with you in New York while we wait for whatever will happen to Gideon."
I shook my head. "I'm sorry, Charlie. I can't." Something caressed my heart when I felt his hand on mine. But I took it back from him. This was wrong.
"You can't go with me."
I couldn't let Charlie stay with me. I was still married to Gideon! And I've hurt Charlie enough. I even lied to him about our baby.
Besides, after everything I've been through, I needed to be alone.
His lips parted. His chocolate brown eyes were begging me to take him in. "But you said you still love me, right?"
I looked away. I couldn't stand his stares. "Whether I still love you or not doesn't matter anymore, Charlie. I'm still married to your brother."
A sad smile curled on my lips. "And I told you… I needed to heal first. I lost everything, Charlie. My father… my baby… my life." I almost croaked at my last word.
"But you didn't lose me, Bianca." Charlie went to me. "I'm still here," he said in his most gentle voice, kneeling in front of me. "I didn't stop loving you." His eyes sparkled with unshed tears.
I felt the tears forming in the corner of my eyes. I remembered how I hurt him that day.
"Bianca, hi." Charlie's familiar voice greeted me on the other line.
"H-Hi. I'm sorry for calling you at this hour." I realized it was already midnight in India.
"It's okay, baby. Why did you call?"
My heart wrenched when I heard his endearment for me. I gripped the phone hard.
"I'm sorry, Charlie. I… I did something."
I heard the rustling of the sheets. "B-bianca? Are you crying? What happened?"
I shut my eyes and cover my mouth with my hand for a moment. I… couldn't do it.
"We need to break up, Charlie," I said, finally delivering the words. "I'm breaking up with you."
"W-what? Is this some kind of a prank, Bianca?"
"No. I'm sorry, Charlie." I bit my lower lip hard to stifle a sob. Tears were already falling from my eyes like waterfalls. My chest tightened so hard. I couldn't breathe.
"I've b-been unfaithful to you, Charlie. W-while you were away… I met someone. I got drunk… then something happened between us. Now, I'm breaking up with you. I'm so sorry."
"No, Bianca!" His voice was like thunder. "I don't believe you! Why are you doing this? Why are you lying to me?!"
"I'm not lying, Charlie! I'm breaking up with you." With my blurry eyes, I stared at the engagement ring on my hand. I haven't removed it yet.
"N-no. Bianca. I'm coming home. Wait for me. We need to discuss—"
"Stop it, Charlie. We have nothing else to talk about. My decision's final."
"Bianca!"
"I hope this is the last time we hear from each other. I'm going to change my number after this. Goodbye, Charlie."
"I'm sorry, Charlie." Tears finally fell from my eyes. "We can't be together. At least, not now."
He closed his eyes for a moment. As if taking in all the pain. When he opened them, he just gave me a small, sad smile. "I can't force you, can I?"
I wiped the tears from my face. "I have something to give you, Charlie." I stood up and went to my luggage. I opened it and from there, I took out a familiar piece of jewelry that I once wore.
"Here." I handed Charlie the engagement ring that he had given me. "I'm giving this back to you, Charlie."
He only stared at the ring on my palm before his eyes went back to me. "That's yours, Bianca. I already gave it to you. You don't need to return it."
"N-No. Just take it back, Charlie."
That ring was a reminder of the love I had lost. I needed to let it go. I didn't deserve this ring.
"Alright." He sighed. "I'll take it back."
I felt something clench my heart as he took the ring from me. I felt like I was breaking up with him for the second time around.
But this was only right. I needed to let go of this ring just as I needed to let go of him.
Charlie… I would be happy for you if you'll find someone else. You deserve someone better.
"But this doesn't mean I've already given up on you, Bianca." His eyes went back to me. "I'll wait. And I'll give this ring back to you. In time."
"Charlie…"
I bit my lower lip. I wanted to tell him how much I love him… still. But I stopped myself.
"Come on." He glanced at his watch before picking up my luggage. "I'll drive you to LAX."
"You don't have to."
"Please, Bianca."
In the end, I let him drive me to the airport. We were already fifteen minutes on the road when my phone rang.
A familiar shiver ran down my spine when I took out my phone from my coat's pocket and saw who was calling.
"It's Amelia," I told Charlie.
I cleared my throat before pressing the accept button.
"A-amelia?"
"B-Bianca…" Amelia's shaky voice welcomed me. "Where are you?"
I turned to Charlie who was giving me curious glances. "I'm on my way to the airport."
"Y-you need to go back, Bianca. Please, come here to the hospital."
My chest tightened. "W-why? What happened to Gideon?"
"Gideon's finally awake, Bianca!"
"W-what?"
"He is. And he's looking for you."