Caspian would leave, and he would spend the rest of his life trying to get over him.
But instead, he was the one trying to convince the Omega to leave.
He had to pace because he was beginning to believe the hope Caspian presented with his words, and if he did that, he would become just like his father.
He couldn’t do that to Caspian, he wouldn’t do that to Caspian.
"Could you put your pacing on hold, so we can have lunch?" Caspian’s level voice came from behind him.
"What?" Every one of Caspian’s words hit him like a freight train.
"Lunch?" He repeated, "We can continue discussing afterward."
Asher resigned to it, clearly the discussion wasn’t working out at the moment, maybe he could get Caspian to accept the inevitable after a meal.
He watched intently as Caspian rose to his feet, sharp eyes ready to pick out the slightest discomfort.
Asher had lied to himself that he was staying away to protect Caspian but he had done it to protect himself, scared to face him.
Only to come back and have Caspian treat him like nothing had changed.
"We can eat here," Caspian was saying, an absent expression on his face. "I wonder if Jael would want to eat lunch too." He added as an afterthought.
Asher’s eyes narrowed at that, "Now why would you care about that?"
"Because I’m hungry too?" Jael strode in like he had always been a part of the conversation.
The Beta had shades on, which was odd because he never kept them on in the house.
Asher grumbled at that but he didn’t protest further, stoically saying nothing about Jael’s shades.
Caspian was already making arrangements for lunch to be brought there instead.
For all the issues that weighed on their shoulders, the air around the table was rather light.
The television was back on, playing its very important role of filling the empty silence.
"I’m going on a short vacation," Jael announced to the table.
Asher shot him a look, "With Gage?"
He genuinely didn’t care if that was the case, he would always despise his old man.
"Gage is long gone," Jael replied instead, adding no details to his vacation.
Asher didn’t push, Jael deserved more than a short vacation. Especially as he had foisted his problems and responsibilities on the Beta at such an awful time.
It was almost like he had joined lunch just to say that, because shortly after, he was rising to his feet and lumbering out the door.
Caspian’s worried eyes followed him, "Will Jael be okay?"
Asher kept his gaze on his plate although he hadn’t eaten another bite since Jael’s announcement.
He didn’t just say that to alleviate Caspian’s worries but because he believed it.
He wished he could offer some sort of comfort to Jael but he knew he wasn’t needed. What the Beta needed then was space, lots of it.
The silence that Jael’s grief brought only lasted until lunch was over, their unresolved issues taking up space again.
"Why don’t we pick up this conversation after Jael returns?" Asher suggested.
If his second-in-command was going to be a key player in their plans, it was for the best.
"Avoidance never fixes anything," Caspian said instead, seeing right through him.
Asher felt caught between a rock and a hard place, Caspian trusted him way too much even after all he had done.
Breaking Caspian’s trust would be just as crushing as hurting him, it was why he couldn’t take the lifeline offered him.
Asher didn’t trust himself.
"I don’t need it to," He pushed a hand through his hair, "I just want to keep you safe."
Caspian remained quiet as Asher walked over to press a kiss into his hair, he knew when to back off.
He fell backward against the sofa when the door shut behind Asher’s broad shoulders, frustration ruining the taste of his lunch.
Maybe it was a bit unfair to expect Asher to just get over his trauma in a matter of hours, but Caspian would appreciate him making a little effort.
He was just trying to make this work because it was either that or they would no longer be part of each other’s lives.
Caspian didn’t want to imagine that.
He felt a bit helpless at the moment, it was beginning to look like that might be the only path open to take.
He slid to the ground, the center table obscuring the television still playing shows in the background.
Before meeting Asher, he had wanted a bland life - one where he would go to work and return to an empty house that was all his.
But the eccentric Mafia King had ruined that ambition so he had to take responsibility.
The life he lived now was very similar to the one he had run off to get away from back at the Pack House.
He spent most of his time indoors, all alone. But he liked it here in the mansion, and what made the difference was Asher.
Caspian liked being woken up in the mornings by Asher saying goodbye even if he looked grumpy about it.
Waiting up for Asher had its charm as well, and the days when Asher cut his days in half to spend more time with him were his favorite.
Slowly his life had begun to revolve around Asher, and he was perfectly fine with that.
He chose to stay after all, and he would choose to stay over and over again.
With his thoughts straightened out, he got to his feet to get comfortable in bed.
He was going to take getting better seriously just to prove a point to Asher. So he would listen to Doctor Brianna’s advice and get enough bed rest.
While trying to push the thoughts of Asher out of his head so that he could try to sleep, his thoughts drifted to Jael.
Reaching out to him to offer something, sympathy or comfort felt shallow. He barely knew Lucy so he didn’t feel like he could speak on her passing.
Jael had made arrangements for the men to handle things for the rest of the day, so running off to work had been very cowardly of Asher.
He sat at his desk brooding and ignoring how antsy it made his men.
Asher needed Caspian to understand and give in, he couldn’t send him away unless Caspian asked to leave.
And even then, he would be pushed to the very edge of his limit to let him go.
Right now, he was a danger to Caspian even without the curse of his wretched bloodline.
Before dealing with that, there was still the matter of his fucked up ruts...
Asher had never wished to be someone else so badly before, but there was no saving him.
Gage hadn’t been able to follow his own advice but he could at least try to do it for Caspian.
It was easier said than done; he wanted two things with the same desperation, and he unfortunately couldn’t have both.
He could either have Caspian or save him.
The hours dragged by slowly, it didn’t help that he did nothing but sit at his desk and let his thoughts consume him.
Trying to do anything work-related was hazardous to everyone so he just sat tight at his desk.
His private line ringing was a little startling because he didn’t expect to hear from Jael so soon.
As a matter of fact, he didn’t think he would hear from the Beta for at least a week.
And he was right... It wasn’t Jael, it was Caspian.
"Asher, hi," The soft familiar voice came through as soon as he picked up.
Caspian sounded drowsy like he was still half asleep when he made the call.
"Is something wrong? Are you alright?" Asher asked in a rush, already halfway out of his seat.
Caspian’s sleepy chuckle didn’t ease his worry, "I’m fine, I just wanted to ask if you would be back in time for dinner."
Asher fell silent for a second too long, he hadn’t been expecting that question.
Caspian was handling everything so calmly, he was the only one who couldn’t be normal about this.
"Yeah," He accepted quietly, rising to his feet as he spoke.
He wasn’t doing anything productive, failing at his position and failing Caspian at the same time was a lot of letting down to be doing at once.
"See you when you get home..." Caspian matched his tone, hesitating for a moment before hanging up like he wanted to say something more.
That was enough to get Asher moving. Yeah, he wanted to go home.
He didn’t often drive himself because Jael always signed up for it, and if Jael was occupied, there were literally hundreds of men who would fill in.
But this time he waved out the duo who were already seated in the car waiting when they saw him walk out of the club.
He got in and drove himself back to the mansion, the drive doing nothing to clear his head.