Shaking my head, I sat on my bed feeling confused about what had just happened. Was it just a dream or reality? I touched my face, and it was as if I could still feel the warmth of someone's palms on my skin.
'Should I really run away?'
Just as I thought about running away, the nurses in the room woke up.
"Why is it so windy every night? It's not even the rainy season," one nurse said after giving a hearty yawn.
"God knows. Let's just go back to sleep," the other one replied, but she stood up to close the window. "I keep forgetting to remind the servants to fix the loose lock…"
Hearing their casual conversation, they must have not realized that I am awake. I listened in? and looked at the window they were talking about. I remembered that those curtains were flapping with force a while ago when I opened my eyes to look at that intruder. At the moment, those curtains had stopped fluttering and were just moving lightly with a light breeze.
'Every night?' I thought about what those nurses said and had a wild guess. 'Was he coming here every night? Does he really want to harm me?' I remembered his large hand that was hovering over my face.
'Was...was he planning to strangle me?'
A shiver ran across my spine.
When I recalled our brief interaction just now, the daze caused by having just woken up was completely gone, and I curled up on instinct.
"I will get water," said the other nurse as she also stood up from her bedding.
I was sitting in the bed but immediately lay down and covered my body with the blanket when I saw the nurse approaching the table near my bed. I bit my lower lip and kept staring at the ceiling which was decorated with delicate fabric curtains hanging from the center above the bed and spreading in a circle around me.
As I clutched the blanket closer with trembling hands, wanting to cover my head with it, those haunting memories I never wanted to see again started to play back inside my mind.
That night, I saw a frightening view and I remembered screaming to my heart's content. Those poor people… who would do such a hideous thing? Was that a warning that the same thing would be done to me if they ever catch me? I ran back inside the tower while stumbling on the staircase. I remembered hurting myself but I didn't dare stop midway.
When I reached my chamber, I immediately climbed inside my bed and covered myself with the quilt. But even the thick quilt gave me no comfort, and my very own bedchamber seemed like a frightening place to me.
I wanted to hide, to never be found, to never be caught by whoever did that to those poor people. Such horrible death. Were they coming for me too?
My room was dark, and it felt like I could see corpses reaching out to me from the shadows. There was blood… so much blood...
'No! No! Please don't!'
Before I could understand what's happening, I found myself leaving my bed. Hiding under my quilt was not enough. My thoughts back then were all over the place, and all I could do was to run and hide inside my wardrobe. Crossing that distance from my bed to the wardrobe seemed like an eternity had passed, even when I now knew it was just a short one.
Getting inside the wardrobe, I quickly closed the door and went behind the dresses hanging inside. I was shaking, and even though I felt unbelievably cold, I was sweating a lot, as if my entire body was drenched in water. But I resisted opening the door of my wardrobe. I could not go out. Whoever killed those poor people could be waiting outside for me.
Inside that suffocating place filled with clothes, perhaps I would be safe. Maybe they would not be able to reach me as long as I stayed quiet.. I didn't care if I couldn't breathe normally. I would prefer dying by suffocating alone rather than dying in the hands of those waiting outside for me.
Quiet… I had to be quiet so I would not be found...
I didn't know how long I had stayed like that when I heard the familiar screech of an eagle. It was that kind eagle who had been giving me food.
'Oh no, what if they get him too?'
Though his presence provided me with a little comfort, I was sure that the bird couldn't help me out. He might even be put in danger as well..
'If I keep quiet, won't he leave? Yes, he will leave and those outside won't be able to catch him.'
Darkness was my only companion the entire time, and when I finally had the strength to open my eyes, I found myself somewhere else. The chamber was unfamiliar. It was not my bedchamber. I was no longer in the tower.
'Did they find me? Will they kill me now? Martha, where are you? Martha… I am scared, Martha…'
People were around me. Were they here to hurt me? Would they kill me and hang me from a tree too?? I was scared. I was scared of everything and everyone.
'I want to go back to my tower.'
When I heard the familiar bird's screech again, I was worried they would hurt him too. I could not allow them to hurt him. He was the only one by my side all the time when I was struggling, providing me with food and even accompanying me when I was scared by myself.
'I need to run away from here. Martha, where are you? Did she leave me behind? No, she would never. Did the King punish her and banish her from the palace?' I wanted to cry, but I couldn't. 'This can be the only reason, or else Martha would never leave me alone. I need to find her.'
I couldn't stop thinking about running away and finding Martha.
However, the two women guarding me were still awake and I had no chance of running away. At least, not tonight.
'Let's just sleep for now.' I closed my eyes so I could regain energy the next day and find a chance to slip out.