"No, that was not my revenge" I spik in a low tone, I do not like his status "my revenge was in process since I told you that you would pay me" he frowns confused "by God Kahin ... Your thoughts and that uncertainty that you felt knowing that I would do something to you was my way of punishing you, the fact that you couldn't be calm because you constantly thought about what I could do was perfect. " He laughs like crazy, and starts hitting the wall hard not caring and afraid that he might get hurt, I get between him and the wall.
"I don't like to see you like this" close your eyes "please calm down, I ask you." The affection with which I speak to him and the gentleness with which I caress his cheek I think they make him look at me. "I did not think to be with another with you present" I smile "I am not capable of doing something like that" I sigh "Kahin, maybe you think that I am a damn because of how I behave, the like contrary, I am sweet and understanding." I decided to open myself to him, he doesn't stop looking at me.
"Just as you are also a very dangerous woman, I can't believe you played that way with me Marilí." His tone is harsh but more conciliatory. "Damn it ... why did you come into my life?" He caresses my cheek and I smile.
"You were the one who got me into it." He comes closer to me and kisses my lips. Calmer because it is no longer uncontrolled I correspond to him. "You scared me," I whisper between his lips.
"I know" he moves away from me "it is not good that you are near me when I am in that status, do not do it any more OK?" I deny in disagreement.
"You haven't hurt me and I know you wouldn't." He takes me in his arms and I wrap myself around his body. "Have I told you that I have the gift of knowing what people are like just by looking into their eyes?" he denies and kisses my neck. "Well, I already told you" I stroke his hair.
"You behave as if I am the worst thing in the world." he bites my chin.
"Well, you bought me, what did you expect? I hope this has taught you something," he growls and bites my lip this time.
"I'm going to fuck you like crazy, you're going to pay me for this bad joke you've made on me, your wit scares me a lot and I'm not afraid of anything or anyone." He walks into the room.
"Sleep with me" He denies again, it's not that I want to be his wife, but he fucks me and leaves, doesn't feel good.
"I already told you, we can't sleep together." When he leaves me in bed I sit down.
"Kahin, we are not going to fall in love by sleeping together and hugging, I know that your thing is to fuck and that's it." I think about whether to ask if that dream has something to do with it, but I choose not to mention it.
"I don't trust, Marilí, forget that please." He kisses me to settle the issue, I say no more, it is not worth it and also I am not in a hurry to create a bond with him.
"Why do you want to spend time with me? Why do you want to know me and have me to yourself? " I'm back on the attack, I can't keep quiet "I mean, you are not willing to have a serious relationship, why have me? Do you just want someone stable to fuck?" Kahin pulls away from me and sits on the edge of the bed without looking at me.
"Can you stop asking silly questions?" Hurt by his answer, I stand up and face him.
"Maybe you're used to this Kahin, but I'm not, I can't accept that you only have me for sex, what I don't understand is your stupid behavior." He looks at me with a frown like every time he doesn't like the truths I tell his face. "What happened today? Jealousy or maybe it was just your anger issues?" He starts to get upset, I know.
"Can you stop asking?" He gets up to leave, but I stop him.
"You are not going to leave me talking to myself, you always confuse me with your behavior, you think I'm going to fall in love with you, you say you don't care about anything, but when a man talks to me you get angry, you don't want to give me my freedom and You do the impossible to be with me, you do what I ask, you please me and you keep me happy. Do you realize that everything in you is contradictory? " The fury is growing in him, I am pestering him with all my questions, but I have to do it I must know what he really wants, I am not going to stay half my life playing what he wants. "Do you even realize how dangerous this can be?" He lets go of my grip, I go after him. "Damn, talk to me." Shouted him.
"Fuck, Marilí, stop bugging me!" he screams me "it's not jealousy, I just want to fuck you, you said it yourself, this is not dangerous, not if you don't fall in love with me." His words hurt me, I never believed that they had such an effect on me, that he to not answer all my questions annoys me.
"It's okay Kahin." Disguising how I really feel about what he said, I smile. "Then there is no need to worry" I look into his eyes "but something if it has to be clear to you, if you are going to have me it is only for these 6 months, I am only willing to be your damn whore for those months, I do not want to be more your damn bitch. I guess that million and a half dollars will cover all this time" I turn around “and if those 6 months are not enough ... I will hate you as I have never hated anyone. You have no feelings, you never think about what others feel, it's not fair Kahin, it's not right that you only about for yourself." I look at him again. "But it's like they say, lonely, hostile and bitter people like you. Always you have to force other people to spend time with you to make us just as unhappy." I smile with disgust "How can I blame you for something like that?" Without saying another word I go to the room, until today it will that affectionate treatment between us, until today I am good with him and from today I will see him as he really is, as a tyrant, heartless, manipulative, problematic, and an asshole.
The urge to cry invades me, the frustration overwhelms me, the confusion that this man creates in me is insurmountable, I did not believe in all the warnings my mother gave me, I did not pay attention to everything she told me about people and here I am, I have run into a bad man who I thought was good, I've hit the wall for believing that he could not harm me. <<But what did I think? That after he buying me we would become intimate and finally give me my freedom and I could forget all this?>>. I think hurt to realize that not everyone has good feelings deep down.
"Sweet." I listen to him, but I don't look at him, I don't even want to feel his presence. "Excuse me please." Hearing his supposed voice of regret makes me sick.
"Don't talk to me, don't tell me anything, I don't even want to see you, and I already know that I am here to fuck and not to complain, but I don't care, I don't want to have sex, not now Kahin and it's better that you stay away from me ... You better do it." I yell at him furiously without looking at him.
"Let me explain please." I let out a laugh.
"What are you going to explain?" I look at him "Are you going to tell me that it wasn't you who told me all that? What was your damn anger problem? Because if you're going to tell me that, you'd better shut your damn mouth and get out of here." He comes closer to me, I don't move.
"I won't tell you that, I just want to talk." I push it away from me.
"You just want to talk and then fuck me and I don't want to, you've already used me today and I don't want to do it again." I lie back down and turn my back on him.
"I want to sleep with you." He whispers
"No, I can fall in love with you later, don't forget, don't trust me Hamann, please leave me alone." I feel his hand on my back, I sit up and point my index finger at him. "Leave me alone or I'll castrate you while you sleep." He immediately stops touching me.
"Okay, I don't want to argue anymore, but you must listen to me." I deny.
"Go away please, if you have even a hint of remorse, go." I go back to bed, feel him get up and leave the room.
This is not a moment of weakness, that man does not deserve anything from me, he does not deserve me to be so compassionate with him, he does not even deserve my good treatment, he is a bastard who only wants my body and does not care about my feelings.