“I have never been able to paint naked, now we go, still in one position.” He listens to me, I love the way he's positioned, his body stretched out across the bed, and his arms under his head, his serious gaze and his completely hard erection make my panties get wet. My concentration is unflappable; I dedicate myself to this job. After a few hours, I finally finished it and smile at the results, that work would be my final work for drawing class, it was beautiful.
“I want to see it,” he said when he gets up, stands next to me and looks at my work. "WOW! It's impressive," he whispers, "you're incredible, Marilí." He kisses me on the lips.
"Why else can you kiss and pamper me but not sleep with me?" I look into his eyes and seriousness settles on his face.
"Because I don't want you to fall in love with me, if I slept with you, you would have slept hugging me and I can't allow that."
I narrow my eyes, “maybe more than one goes crazy for being your partner but I am not Mr. Hamann, we are both adults and we know very well what is happening here, this is an agreement in which the first rule is not to fall in love. But what did you think? That for being a good fucker I was going to fall in love just because of that and nothing more? I don't know what kind of brainless you are related to, but without a doubt they are very different from me, I could never be very different with you." His seriousness was almost alarming, “what if there were cuddles, smooches and the occasional sex? Well, yes, but that was part of the moment, of the fever and the pleasure, don't be under any illusions, Mr. Hamann, a disappointment can be very painful.” I assure him with a smile.
"Well, I'm glad you have things clear," he smiles at me, he leaves me that our bodies don’t stay in contact, “it's just like you said, you're just sex for me and that's how I want you to stay.”
What he says hurts, but swallowing my feeling, I nod while smiling, “now that things are clear, I'm going to sleep for a while if it doesn't make you uncomfortable, now I do feel the fatigue in my body.” When walking, my sex hurts, too rough sex to be my first time, I overdid it.
"Okay, rest,” he looks at me and when I think he's going to stop me to give me a kiss, he doesn't, I don't either, I don't need to. When I go to bed, his perfume is impregnated on the sheets and on my skin. With a smile on my lips, I fall asleep.
I hear my voice, I am screaming and very agitated, my laugh resounds all over the place, Carla's voice reaches my ears just as loud as mine. Carla? I open my eyes lazily, I want to know where those voices come from, when I finish opening my eyes ,I see him next to me looking at the screen of his laptop with a frown.
“What are you doing?”
He hears my sleepy voice and immediately closes the screen and then looks at me, “nothing,” he said just as serious.
“I heard my voice and that of my friend,” I stretch and then sit down, it was a mistake, my sex hurts. "How did you get a video of us yesterday?" I look at him questioningly, he bites his cheeks inside, I feel it.
"Malcolm recorded you,” his sharp voice and angry tone makes me laugh.
“Oh well! If Mr. Hamann was the first to say that there could be no jealousy, why is that?” I hit him to piss him off more.
“Leave the bravado with me Marilí, it's not jealousy, don't get your hopes up, it just makes me quite worrying that you're having fun this way, you're a lady and you shouldn't even drink alcohol.”
A loud, mocking laughter comes from my gut, “are you going to tell me that is just men's stuff? Well no, Mr. Hamann, in this century, women can do the same as men, except play stupid, that is not given to us.” His glare at me only makes my smirk grow.
"Are you calling me stupid?"
I shrug, “to the one who has the glove, then let him put it on, I never said your name.” I get out of bed and when I look at my cell phone I see the time it's 11 am, I didn't sleep at all. I go to the bathroom and before I get there, he already has me by the arm.
"You won't leave me talking to myself,” he growls at me through clenched teeth.
“I'm pissing and see you always have your priorities and now mine is to go to the bathroom,” I let go and finish my way, when I relieve myself I decide to bathe, the fresh water reminds me of the night I spent, a current goes through my belly. How long will those currents be there every time I think of him? I asked, half annoyed, I can't spend half my life warming myself up every time I think of him.
When I get out of the bathroom, I can't find him, I go through the gigantic room until I find the closet. It's huge! There are women's clothes everywhere you look. “You like?” His thick voice scares me off and I jump.
"Mr. Hamann, what audacity you have," I look at him offended, “how can you have all your clothes in one place?” At least mine would have pushed them away, I wasn't interested in knowing how many women he has fucked and if ... I know I shouldn't care, but damn he could be more discreet. Enraged, I take out the first thing I see and put it on, it's a moldy green dress that doesn't suit me one bit, I look like a bean, although I haven't seen myself in the mirror, I know it's like that.
"That was not my intention,” he looks at me with his typical pissed-off gesture.
“I'm not interested,” without saying more, I leave the room and go to the kitchen, I rummage in the cupboard and when I see what my passion is without thinking I take it, I go for a spoon and I prepare to eat it in exaggerated portions.
“Why are you eating that?” He asks, disgusted.
“Because I like it?” I asked back, still eating.
"By God ... That's strawberry jelly, it must be cloying."
I raise an eyebrow, “as much as me,” I winked at him.
"You are a sweet temptation, you would never cloak me," he shrugs.
"Well, I never will, after today I will never see you again."
He doesn't stop looking at me, “take this pill, it is to avoid pregnancy, from tomorrow you should plan, these cannot be taken as if they were sweets, try not to take it for a whole year.” I look at the box that he hands me and then take it in my hands, read what it says and nod, turning my back, I look for water and drink it. A strange and uncomfortable silence sets in. "You can go see your mother."
Almost choking, I look at him, “are you serious?” I questioned, "do you really mean it?" I couldn’t hide my amazement, I never thought that he would do something like that for me, “but the contract says that ...”
"Forget the contract, go to your mother." He doesn't smile but I do, it's what I want. "The money is on deposit."
Without being able to take it anymore, I jump on him, he catches me in the air and giving him a kiss, I look at him, “you're not a jerk after all, Mr. Hamann." I give him another kiss that he reciprocates, “I really appreciate it.” He doesn't say anything and I'm happy because I'm going to see my mother, I run towards the room, I put on the clothes I came with, I'm not going to take anything from him. I take my canvas and go out to say goodbye, but I don't see him anywhere.
"We can go now, Marilí,” Malcolm says, I smile, he finally said my name.
"I know, but I want to say goodbye to Mr. Hamann."
The man refused and when he sees my confusion he clears me up, "Mr. Hamann is missing." I frown, I'm stupid. How could I believe we could say goodbye in a nice way? A little angry I follow Malcolm to the car.
When I got to the hospital, I take Kahin out of my mind, I won't see him anymore and I have to get on with my life. Before entering the room where Mom is recovering, the cell phone vibrated, I transferred the canvas I was carrying to the other hand and reached for the phone in my jean’s pocket.
‘You are my sweet and my temptation.’
Reading what he wrote, I decompose the gesture. Didn't he have the decency to not say goodbye and he sends me this? Without paying attention, I delete the message and block his number. I sold my virginity, he enjoyed it and the contract here was fulfilled. Covering the canvas well, I entered the room.