I did not give it any conscious thought before raising my hand to ward Lexie off. She was uncertain, her blue eyes widening as she deliberated. Once more, the sunlight was illuminating her, and the tiny diamond studs that were embedded in her earlobes were reflecting the light.
Her pink lips were curled into a smile, and the brisk pace I had set on the walk here had caused her cheeks to become flushed with color. She appeared to be breathtakingly gorgeous and heartbreakingly young. Momentarily, I wished that I hadn't intervened and stopped her. I didn't just want a friendly embrace from her, but I wanted to feel her arms wrap around me anyway. I wanted her to lean her head back and press the entirety of her body against mine so that I could test whether or not her lips were as supple as they appeared to be. I also wanted to taste her lips to see if they were as smooth as they appeared.
It caused me to become irrationally angry, and as a result, my tone was harsher than I had intended it to be.
"Lexie, we aren't a sorority. This is a fraternity." In the real world, when you want to say goodbye to someone, you give them a firm handshake rather than pressing up against them.
Her flower petal lips parted in surprise, and her smile vanished just as quickly as it had appeared. The pink in her cheeks turned a deep crimson color and began to spread across the rest of her face.
Her eyes lost their sparkle as she spoke.
I made an effort to lower the pitch of my voice, but the harshness was still audible.
"I'm telling you this for your own good, so please don't take offense. When it comes to this line of work, you don't want to give people the wrong idea.
She apologized, but her tone was so tight that it sounded as if her vocal chords were squeezing each syllable out of existence.
I snapped at her, inexplicably irritated by the fact that she had apologized, "Don't be sorry." "Just be smarter."
It wasn't my intention to make her angry, but when I saw how her mouth scrunched up and her eyes narrowed in response to what I'd said, I realized that I had.
Good. I preferred it when she was angry to when she was hurt.
Just a moment ago, I had the impression that I had just kicked Bambi, but now I could see the light of battle in her eyes. I liked it when I saw it there when she was defending the sorority lifestyle. I had seen it there before. It sparked a desire in me to—
No. I brought an abrupt end to my train of thought and refocused my attention away from her. It was a terrible way to end our relationship, but the further I got away from her, the better I felt overall.
The fog in my brain lifted. I regained my ability to breathe.
It's possible that it was cruel, but it was absolutely necessary. At least, that's what I vowed to myself over and over again.
My day revolved around the idea that some things are cruel but necessary. Preston called me and tried to convince me to coerce Julius into pressuring the producer to cast him. He also tried to convince me to coerce the producer myself. I didn't even try to couch my disdain for him, telling him in no uncertain terms what I would do if he bothered me one more fucking time about this role that he wasn't good enough for, that he'd never be good enough for. I didn't even try to couch my disdain for him. I told him in no uncertain terms what I would do. I laughed at his threat to look for a new agent when he said it, though.
"Go ahead," I said. "Have fun being the B-list version of Matthew McConaughey," the interviewer said.
The previous exchange left me feeling enraged, so I immediately called the agent of the actor who wanted top billing over my client. I was aware of some scandalous details about his life that the media would have a hard time covering.
The representative snapped, "If you leak to the media, you'll sink the entire production," but I heard the quaver beneath his words.
“So?” I responded to that. "I'll get my guy the lead in the next Michael Bay movie while yours gets knocked back to playing murder victim number two on CSI," said the other person. "I'll get my guy the lead in the next Michael Bay movie."
Suddenly, there was a deafening silence that ripped through the line, and I realized that I had won.
You would think that by the time I met up with my friends for happy hour, I would have been in a good mood, but for some reason, discontentment continued to seethe through my veins. I sipped my drink more quickly than usual and made an effort to unwind as Andrew complained about the most recent situation that one of his most difficult customers had gotten themselves into. When he told us about how he tried to bribe the LAPD and how close he came to getting arrested himself, the others and I laughed, but I couldn't help but feel that the humor was forced.
Lexie was all I could think about. The few seconds that her lips shook before forming a thin, hard line that still looked strangely attractive. I liked it when she got mad enough to show me some of the fire I could feel bubbling under her sweet, good girl exterior. I've never liked a woman who did nothing. Even though Kim was hard, she was proof of that. When we were teenagers and first met, she was as bright as a torch. She was tired, and the years when she lived well on the child support she didn't use to help take care of our child were coming to an end. I worried that she would want to go out with a bang.
“Hey, earth to Ryder.” Julius made a snapping motion with his fingers in front of my face.
I hit his hand to get it away. By the way Julius talked, I could always tell what movie he was thinking about. Right now, it must be the follow-up to the big science fiction hit from last summer.
"I'm sorry, I'm busy." I drew a picture to explain what was going on with Kim and the crap at work. Then, almost as an afterthought, I added, "On top of that, I have to deal with Samantha's sorority sister."
“Deal with?” Andrew said it again.
"Yeah," I said, and when they just stared at me blankly, I went into more detail.
"The other day, Samantha told me to pick her up at the airport, and today she told me to take her to lunch."
Michael seemed to speak for all of them when he said, "That's rough, pal."
Julius was the first to laugh, and then everyone else joined in. My anger went up a notch. "I'm not a babysitter, fuck it."
Lyndon added, "And she's not a baby." Then he looked at me more closely and saw something that no one else had seen.
Damn his instincts. It made him a great security guard and a really annoying friend. "Or is that the problem?" he asked with great intelligence.
The laughs turned into raised eyebrows.
"No problem," I quickly replied as I finished my beer. "I'm just too busy right now to be a tour guide."
"Does anyone know where this tourist is?" The group was asked by Lyndon. "What does she look like?"
They gave a shrug. Andrew said, "I'll find her."
I didn't think he couldn't do it either. He and Samantha were friends on Facebook. I didn't do any of that stuff, except for the Instagram account I had for The Williams Agency, but I figured Lexie had Snapchat, Tik Tok, or whatever Millennials are into these days.
I told Andrew to put his phone away when he pulled it out of his pocket. I don't want you stalking my daughter's friends."
Then tell us how she looks, he said, pausing his thumb on the screen.
Under my collar, I felt an unpleasant itch. I didn't even want to think about how Lexie looked, let alone try to describe her. I said, "She's blonde."
Michael said, "Of course she is," and everyone laughed.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I demanded. Then I had to listen to an uncomfortable list of all the people I had dated in the past. They were all blondes.
"It's LA," I said in my defense. "Everyone is blonde."
Andrew looked at the table behind us in a showy way. Unlucky for me, it was full of brunettes.
I gave up and said, "Fuck off." "What color her hair is doesn't matter. I don't care about her. "She's young."
I could see them looking sideways at each other, trying to decide who was brave enough to say it. Of course it was Lyndon, since he had studied martial arts and had a permit to carry a gun.
He scratched his chin and said, "She's not a kid though." "Is it true that she's older than Samantha?"
I said through clenched teeth, "And Samantha is a kid."
Andrew spoke up and said, "Sure, she's a kid to us. But, I mean, legally, she's twenty-one. What's Lexie's age?"
“Twenty-three.” My jaw was so tight that I could barely get the words out.
Another very long break. This time, Michael took the lead. "You had a four-year-old when you were twenty-three."
And I was making a lot of money. But that wasn't the same. When Kim told me that the pregnancy test was positive, I had to grow up quickly. I had to leave all my friends behind because they were still having fun in college while I was heating up bottles at 3 a.m. and working 17-hour days. Lexie and I were very different when we were both 23.
However, since it was too difficult to explain, all I could say was, "It's different."
"Without a doubt," Julius replied in a calm tone.
"But look, all we're saying is..."
I interrupted him with, "Well, don't. No matter how old she is, it makes no difference. Because she is Samantha's friend, you are not allowed to talk to her. That goes for each and every one of you." I focused my vision and then moved it from one of them to the next in succession.
Andrew innocently raised his hands in the air. Lyndon fixed me with an unwavering gaze that conveyed the message that he would do whatever the devil he pleased. Julius gave a shrug as if it didn't make any difference to him which way it went.
Michael continued to look at me for a little while longer, as if he was trying to figure out what it was that I wasn't saying. I continued to glare at him for a few more seconds.
"Okay," was the word that he finally said. "She's off limits."
Even Lyndon gave a satisfied nod in response. The tight band of tension that had been around my chest began to relax. I wasn't even aware that I had become more rigid, but the annoyance was still pumping through me to this very day. I was confident that my friends would uphold their end of the bargain and refrain from touching Lexie.
Now all I had to do was make sure I could keep mine off as well.