The face I see on the other side does not take me by surprise at all, it was obvious that it would come. I huff and go back to intrude on the back of the four white walls that support that room that lately is just a kind of sanctuary used to escape from the encounter of others.
Knowing me, Mía knows better than I the causes of my escape and I am not obliged to tell her that, but what followed next, after having crossed paths with Samuel, a scene of which she demands numerous details from me with a tone of enthusiasm in his voice that enrages me. It is not at all pleasant for me to recall everything that happened a couple of hours ago, an image that I cannot get out of my mind under any circumstances.
She, with a show of relief in her eyes, says she has not witnessed any romantic scene between Samuel and his "current girl". But as convincing as his voice sounds ... I don't know whether to believe that story or not. I know what their character is like, even if I had seen them kissing in front of their eyes, I would deny it, trying to avoid making me feel worse than I already am.
As always, we distract ourselves talking nonsense, ignoring the passing of the hours and only getting ready to leave when the repetitive sound of knocking on the door echoes in my ears again, except that this time it is Luisa.
Dinner is boring to me, while Mia seems extremely entertaining. When I observe her chatting with my father in such a friendly and harmonious way, I am not lacking in wanting to bathe her in the juice she is drinking. It is incredible how angry I see him, acting happily with others, laughing, when he knows perfectly well that I did not overcome the pain that he caused me with each of his previous decisions. The simple fact of noticing a smile on his face drives me out of control and not to mention what happens if that smile is dedicated precisely to me.
Already when Luisa begins to clear the plates (mostly empty), he mentions something about a birthday party for our cousin Carolina. The news does not impress me, since these types of meetings, celebrations or end-of-year parties are always usually held in our house due to its large size and extension.
...
That same night I have a strange dream or nightmare in which Samuel looked at me maintaining the same expression with which he was observing me from the end of that long corridor, but that look began to fade, transforming little by little until it became a smile and that smile to a malevolent laugh directed at me, while hugging another girl whose face seemed undefined.
The expression in his eyes makes me wake up terrified, causing a high-pitched scream to come out of my mouth in the middle of the morning. I even end up needing to kick out my brother, who appears at the door with the face of a zombie fresh out of his grave, wondering what happened.
...
After that, I can't go back to sleep, a detail that reminds me of that time I had kissed Samuel in my dream when we were still nothing. "Sometimes the dreams we have are short films of our wishes," Mia had told me. I had ignored her as anyone would, logically. However, what had happened next largely coincided with what he had dreamed of that night. Now she dreamed of him, hugging another, someone whose identity remained undiscovered. Maybe what I wanted the most was to know who the girl he was hugging was, which was strange because I already knew that in real life it was Eva, right?
...
More than half an hour ago, the horns of the different cars flooded the air and they began to appear, crossing the gates and parking in different corners in front of the house. I find myself sitting in front of the dresser, where I do nothing but stare at myself in the mirror, nor do I know why. I only observe that supposed reflection of my face, clashing my eyes with those that appear in the gleaming glass.
The door is yanked open and she appears, dressed up just like me.
- So?
May: It looks good on you.
Mia (laughs): I'm not talking about that, silly. Are you missing a lot? It is going to come down and you are still here.
I sigh, remembering my party of 15, that purple dress and the walk down the stairs of the room, shy, under the gaze of hundreds of people whose eyes were like a burn on my skin. Now I am not wearing a purple dress, but a black one and my hair is not straight and brown like that day, but a little lighter and wavy at the ends whose locks resemble blonde.
May: Come on.
I announce getting out of the chair and turning around in a quick motion that makes my right leg completely exposed due to the design of the dress.
Already passing through the empty corridors, the voices of the people on the lower floor are noticed and when we reach the point where the second floor ends, we can see the entire room full of strangers wearing extremely formal clothes and hairdos. I don't see any family member anywhere. Mia chooses her shoulders and heads for the stairs. I follow her, lifting the edge of the black fabric of the dress to ease my descent. Looking up is when I notice that I am not really behind my friend, but in front of her and the eyes of all the people that fill the room are watching me like novice hunters who never saw a prey. I ignore the detail, ready to continue descending when my gaze meets one of the men in that pile, who looks at me centered, as if there was no one else in that huge house besides me. A sudden cold embraces my body and I hold onto the handrail to make sure I don't fall. As if all that wasn't the worst, he seems to notice my state and walks over, climbing the last four remaining steps. He reaches out to me and extends his hand with a small, shy smile formed on his lips, identical to the one he did the first day I met him.