Doris tried not to stare, she tried not to look for the girl who matched the voice that wanted to lure William into bed. But-she couldn't seem to focus on anything else. Her wolf kept whispering in her ear about the woman, but she wasn't entirely sure why she even cared. It wasn't her business to care what he did with anyone. She was on this trip to serve him and that was it. But still, her curiosity had gotten the better of her and made her waste a full day in the cold.
Doris lingered around the main camp where everyone spent most of their time catching up with each other before they went on with their days. She watched as gossip was shared and warm drinks were passed around but not one of them had that voice. Not one of them offered for her to join them, either. She supposed she wasn't entirely liked or trusted here yet and she didn't blame any of them for it. It was hard for her to trust anyone too.
William had gone off with Patrick and Enzo and he didn't so much as say a word to her since the day before. Why did he always make her feel as if she did something wrong? She didn't, she reminded herself. She did nothing wrong.
Doris just wanted to see who the girl was, she didn't want to rip her apart like her inner wolf wanted so desperately for her to do. Some sick twisted part of her just wanted to see what William was offered.
It took hours in the cold, but she finally heard it.
"There!" Her wolf hissed. Doris sat up straighter and clenched her drink that had gone cold long ago. A tall, thin woman with long blonde hair passed by her with a man close by. Their heads were bent in conversation and she recognized the voice immediately. "What are you going to do to her for trying to seduce our mate?"
"Nothing!" Doris whispered and quickly looked around to make sure no one heard her. "He's not our mate."
"You can't deny it forever. Sooner or later it will kill you to see him with someone else. You know he would tear the head off anyone that looked at you the wrong way."
"I don't care about anything he does." Doris insisted and turned her eyes away from the beautiful woman. If he wanted her, he could have her. She cleaned up her mess and headed towards her cabin to find a bit of warmth and a nap.
"You think I would ever be foolish enough to believe that? I know your heart better than you. Admit he is a good man to you."
"I would never." Doris whispered as harshly as she could manage. She hadn't gotten used to replying in her mind yet, which she really needed to work on.
"Imagine him with that girl. Imagine him how he was with Melody and tell me you don't care." The voice taunted. Doris tried to block out the memories. She didn't need Melody's over exaggerated sounds haunting her dreams again.
"I don't know what you think you're doing, but it's not going to work. He's a prince, I'm just his servant. We're not meant to be." Doris hissed, she clenched her fists at her sides as she tried to quicken her steps to her cabin where no one would stare at her if she started shouting at her inner wolf. And she was very close to doing just that.
"Go on, picture him on top of her like he was on top of you in your dream. How did it feel to have his mouth all over you? Did you wish it was real? Did you let yourself-"
"Stop it!" Doris shouted. Several eyes turned to look at her as if she was insane. She felt a bit insane, if she was honest. She closed her eyes tightly as if it would make them all disappear around her but of course, they didn't. They were still all there, staring at her as though she had just dropped her mind on the floor in front of them.
"Sorry." Doris said before she slammed the door shut to her cabin behind her. She couldn't even remember how she got here, it was all a huge blur as she raced across the snow for some privacy. Having a wolf was a lot more annoying than she ever thought it would be. She had truly never considered what it would be like to have something inside you pick a fight to prove a point that was so utterly wrong.
"What do I call you, anyway?" Doris asked as she slid off her jacket and went to start a fire.
Her wolf laughed. It was such a divine sound, Doris was sure she wasn't going to answer. "Cordelia. I'm a bit embarrassed you didn't know that already."
The name sounded familiar, as if it had already been on the tip of her tongue. She didn't have the slightest idea to how that was possible. "Why would I ever know that?"
"You've had many dreams of me, I suppose you've only forgotten." Cordelia made a sound of disapproval.
Doris moved to the window and glanced out the curtains. Luckily, no one was staring at her cabin. "You made them all think I'm insane."
"They already thought that, my dear." She laughed. Doris rolled her eyes. "They've all been where you are once before. Perhaps when they were younger or recently. It's normal to be afraid."
Doris wanted to object and demand that she wasn't afraid, not one bit. But that wouldn't have been the truth. She was terrified. Was it possible to never change into her wolf again?
Her eyes caught on William as he walked across the snow with Patrick. He was hard to miss with his height and sharp features that were hard to look away from. His face was twisted in a fit of anger, but Doris thought he always looked that way.
The blonde woman from before stopped him in his tracks and Doris strained to hear what they talked about, but she was just too far. She slammed the curtain closed before she turned away and headed straight for the bed.
She didn't care. She knew she didn't. At least she didn't have to listen to their noises here. This wasn't the palace, he couldn't make her stand out in the snow just to hear his pleasure. It had to be a while since he had last spent the night with someone-romantically. It was only a matter of time before he gave in to the offers and advances.
Good riddance, at least it wasn't her he was pawing at.
Her angry thoughts dimmed as she let it lure her to sleep. At least her wolf silenced enough to let her escape from it all.
"Doris?" A soft voice gently pulled her awake. A large hand gripped her shoulder and the sweet smell of cinnamon made her eyes open wide. Enzo stood above her with a look of concern. "I heard you had a bit of an outburst today. I brought cake, if that helps."
Doris slowly sat up and rubbed her eyes. She was so distracted by her anger, she'd fallen asleep in her snow clothes. He wasn't lying about the cake. It was oozing with icing and cinnamon, she could have devoured the entire thing in one bite.
"I... I was talking with my wolf outside, not having a breakdown."
"Ah, I figured that." Enzo sat on the edge of her bed and set the plate on the table next to her. "You know how rumors go, they always get more dramatic by the time you hear them."
Doris smiled a little and hugged her knees to her chest. "I've been trying not to talk out loud when I respond, but-"
"It can be hard at first." Enzo nodded and spun a gold ring around on his finger as he spoke. "I think it took me years before I fully stopped. Even now, I catch myself saying a thing or two out loud when I meant to say it privately. Is yours giving you trouble?"
Doris couldn't help it when her cheeks reddened. She cursed her blush and begged the cold to ward it away. "No. She's fine, just hard to get used to."
Enzo nodded slowly. "I can only give advice for you to practice responding in your mind. Eventually it will get easier but it's hard when they sound as if they're right next to you.
"I just don't-" Doris flinched when the door of her cabin banged open.
"I knew I would find you two here."
Doris and Enzo turned to see William with a bit of indifference on his face that seemed forced. His face was a bit red-she couldn't tell if it was from the cold or from his rage that he tried so hard to mask.
His voice was dripped in a deadly poison that chilled her to the bone when he asked, "When were you going to tell me you were lovers?"