The next morning, William was gone again before she had the chance to wake. It seemed that no matter how early she aimed for, he was always ahead of her. Part of her wondered if he even slept at all.
Doris dressed for the day and left the tent as soon as she could. A small flicker of worry always entered her mind when she woke up alone. It didn't leave her until she caught sight of William across the camp speaking with Patrick about something that looked rather intense.
William's skin looked dark under his eyes. She wanted to pull him back in the tent and let him sleep all of his worries away but she knew his mind would never let him rest. William glanced up as if he felt her watching him and she swore a ghost of a smile touched his lips before he turned away.
"How is our boy doing this morning?" Enzo asked from behind her. It made her almost flinch out of her skin.
"Oh, my. I didn't expect you there." She breathed. "I don't think he's doing well. I'm trying to give him as much space as he needs, but I'm worried about him."
"Hmm." Enzo seated himself on a low log and patted the space next to him. Doris slumped down on the seat and tried to keep her eyes off of William for more than a moment. "I think you're right to let him have his space. He came up to me earlier and spoke like nothing had happened and when I tried to ask if he was well, he left right in the middle of my sentence." Enzo frowned. "Honestly, it was rather rude but also expected."
"He tends to avoid his feelings." Doris picked at her nails nervously. "But I wish he wouldn't bury them so deep. He doesn't look like himself at all."
"He'll come around eventually-or I hope he will. Now I understand where all his anger comes from." Enzo watched William move across the camp. William did a good job in pretending neither of them were there as he spoke to everyone else that passed him. "That is not a man anyone should go near at the moment. If I were them, I would run and hide in my tent."
"I'm worried he will disappear inside himself. I already look at him and see he has this hollow version of himself on display for everyone." Doris turned to Enzo. "Do you know if he had his army pulled back yet? We spoke about it last night but he never mentioned it again."
"Oh, he mentioned it last night but hasn't made the official call yet. He thinks that it's too late for him and there's no point." Enzo sighed. "I tried to talk him out of it but he didn't listen."
"No point? People could still be dying out there because of this! He needs to call it off." Doris went to stand, but Enzo gripped her arm. "He told me he would call it off. Why hasn't he done it yet?"
"You're right, Doris. You're always right but he needs to come to that decision on his own. If we try to push him, he might only push back. I don't want him to disappear more inside himself like you said."
"I know he feels regret for how things went. I know he wants to undo what has already be done, but he can't have this war continue because he feels this way. He will only pile on more regret if he lets this continue for another moment." Doris ran her fingers through her hair. "We need to talk to him, Enzo."
Enzo stared at her for a long moment before he nodded. He pushed himself off the log and brushed off the dirt from his pants. "Fine, fine. We'll do the right thing. But if he gets mad at me, you better take the blame for this. I don't want to end up pushed down a snowy hill by an angry man." Enzo muttered.
Doris rolled her eyes and laughed a little as she accepted his hand to stand. William had disappeared inside the main tent with a few of his guards. Enzo took the lead and went right in as if he owned the place and spread his arms wide to greet them.
"Good day, gentlemen. I need a word with our prince here, if you wouldn't mind leaving." Enzo said as he gestured to the exit. Doris slipped in behind him and watched as the men exchanged annoyed looks before they got up to leave.
"Thank you, thank you. You can come by later to bother him if you insist." Enzo said with a smile on his face. Doris watched William stare at the table in front of him as if nobody else was even in the room.
Quietly, she went to sit in a chair close to him once all the men were finally gone. "Are you hungry?" She asked softly.
William lifted his eyes to her and looked little surprised as if he hadn't even realized she entered the room. It was strange to even think of that, since he always usually knew exactly where she was at all times.
"No." He finally said. "I ate when I got up this morning."
"Well, that's a relief. We worried you were going to pass out with how fatigued you look." Enzo plopped down across from them. Doris lightly put her hand on William's thigh under the table.
"What is it you need, Enzo?" William sighed and leaned back in his chair.
"Me? I don't need anything. We're here to make sure you're okay."
"I'm fine. You can go back to terrorizing the camp with your ridiculous jokes." William muttered. He moved to stand, but Doris held his thigh a little harder so he stayed.
"William, we know you're hurting. I know that what has happened will stay with you for a long time and that's okay. It's okay if you need days or weeks or months to recover from what you went through. There's nothing wrong with needing time to heal."
William stared at Doris as if she had grown a second head. "I'm fine. It's all fine, Doris."
"Don't lie to the lady. She has your baby inside her." Enzo said as he leaned across the table. "She's only trying to reach out her hand to you."
William grew silent.
"William, you need to end this war before more deaths occur. You won, it's over. Having this continue doesn't make anything right, it makes it worse." Enzo said as gently as he could.
"Enzo is right. If you don't pull back, more people might loose their lives for nothing."
"If they are still fighting, that's their fault." William grumbled. "By now they should have heard what happened and should have stopped on their own."
"William, you're their leader now! Act like their leader and put an end to this." Doris gripped his hand. "It's going to be okay. I know it doesn't feel like it, but one day it will."
"I don't know why you two insist I have won this when I only feel defeated." William stood, but he didn't move towards the door. "I couldn't possibly make more mistakes than I already have."
"You definitely can, mate." Enzo said sadly. "If you let more of your people fight for nothing, it'll end up with more casualties. More lives that didn't need to end."
William glanced between them.
"You told me you would call it off, William. We talked about this and you agreed to call it off."
"I don't know why I haven't. I... I don't know." William admitted. The broken look on his face cracked her heart.
"I know you feel defeated. I know you don't feel like you earned this win, but you have. You have to start being the king they need you to be. They need to see you act like one now or they'll never believe in you." Doris said.
"How would they look up to me when I'm the reason their crown prince is dead? They looked up to Martin since he was a child! They're going to think of me as a villain and there's nothing I can do to stop that." William paced the small area. It only took him a few steps to get across.
"You can't undo what happened, but you can prove to them that they deserve a king like you." Doris stood and cautiously approached him. "Everything you do from here on out will be judged by them, but that's not a bad thing. It's a chance to make your own path as king."
William slowed his steps and looked down at her. Doris cupped his cheeks. "Feel every horrible thing inside you. But don't let it consume you to the point that you lose yourself."
William leaned into her touch. She wasn't sure how long they stood there, staring at each other-but she knew he needed it. Slowly, she brought his hand down to feel her stomach that hadn't yet grown a bump big enough to see.
"I love you. We love you. Don't ever forget that."