I wish I was told the extent to which I should carry myself, and the magnitude of those that want to do me harm involuntarily.
The more I tried to be myself the more selves I discovered, the more I tried to ran from everything, the more steps I took backwards. Everyone's burdens came to me with a force I could never imagine.
When I did thoroughly comprehend how much I needed not resist, my life got worse. I was torn to shreds emotionally, and physically. The much I could take, came to weight heavily on me even more than anything. It was like being given a short small useless spear and a big useful shield when my opponent has everything in great proportion. Was it a curse or a gift? or was I merely a vessel of the deities?
I must have gone crazy. No one will take what I have worked hard to have from me... The deities should have known that if they started something with me, we were going the whole way. Whether they got what they wanted or not, I was getting what was due to me... Because after working that hard, I think I deserve it.