Chapter 41
I realized I didn't have many options when my breath caught. It surprised me that he hadn't snapped yet because I'd been trying his patience on him a little too much lately. His will and his wolf were stronger than I ever imagined being able to be.
My heart continued to pound mercilessly beneath my ribs while I remained motionless and held my breath. Perhaps I could pretend to be asleep for an extended period of time.
"This is not the time for you to play with me, Kylie." I stumbled because of the way he had pronounced my name—it was like acid burning all the way through to my bones.
Maybe I had gone too far this time, but my safety net was wide open.
I cautiously raised my head, craning my neck in an attempt to loosen it, but as soon as I met his eyes, my breath stuck in my throat. His eyes were all fire and ice, blazing with rage and a kind of need that I could not fathom.
I straightened my body as I shuffled in my seat, but I also felt compelled to give in to him. It was the most inane presentation of anguish I had ever witnessed. Something came out of my throat—a whine mixed with a sob. My wolf detested that I was the one who had brought about the expression on his face. He didn't have to say anything to me to let me know how disappointed he was—his eyes were fixed on mine.
I lowered my head and looked down at my lap.
"Look at me." His tone was rough as he urged. However, I was unable to accomplish it; my resolve was completely broken, and his emotions were re-entering my body.
It was everywhere—so much sorrow, so much rage, and so much longing. Look at me, I said. This time, there was something unusual in his voice—a balance between chaos and control, between man and wolf. In his direction, I raised my head, and his eyes narrowed to look at my face as my lips parted.
"You left me again." His nose wrinkled up. "You left me without a word even though you knew the danger you were putting yourself in, even though you knew how it would make me feel—you don't get to hide away from the consequence; I want you to see what you've put me through."
"Derrick, I—" I closed my mouth, wanting to apologize but knowing that would fall short, as it did Vera when I had apologized to her.
"I was terrified when I woke up. He snarled, sending a rumbling sound around the room. With my heart racing in my chest, I slid my fingers around the edge of the table. His presence surrounded me like a whirlwind, and it seemed to get more enraged with each syllable I spoke.
"And what do you think I felt when I woke up to see you gone?" I detested it, and my heart hurt. I couldn't shake the feeling that, ever since finding him, all I had done was screw around. I brought my hand to my chest and pressed my palm against my heart's excruciating beat.
My wolf was controlling my emotions, but that didn't explain why I was so self-hating. the safety I believed I was creating around myself by not telling him the truth and the lies I was leaning into. Even though I had abandoned him out of personal necessity, he still felt hurt by me, but this was something that could be resolved, and he could move on. Even though what I was about to do to him wasn't the worst, the sinking feeling of hopelessness was enough to send me reeling.
It could only get worse when he found out about my betrayal.
My chest began to blister from the panic that arose against his rage. I swept my eyes wildly around the room, taking in everything and everyone within. What if they were watching me right now, waiting for this to happen, since the heart had been in this room yesterday and had been stolen?
What if it was already too late and they were waiting for my mate to make himself known?
He leaned forward in his chair and looked at my neck's pulse point, then back to the hand on my heart. Despite his anger, he found some pleasure in the fact that he could sense how much he was affecting me and hear the wildness inside of me.
"You have one last chance with me, Kylie—one last chance before I start doing things my own way." His stare was unwavering, and my heartbeat quickened tenfold. His brows furrowed in concern as his gaze flicked back to my chest. "Do you understand what I am saying?" I quickly nodded because I didn't want to argue with him at this point since I was the one endangering him, and he had already given me more than I deserved.
I muttered, "Okay," and he parted his lips at my straightforward consent. I said, "Okay," and it felt as though something had snapped back into place.
Releasing himself from the table, he shifted in his chair. I grabbed his hand, my body flying towards him in panic. Although it was a foolish move, it was my wolf's move. With a gentle sound, he released his hold on me as the electricity between us pulsed. He leaned into his seat, and I watched as his fingers closed around mine. I couldn't handle realizing that the only reason he had come here was to blow up at me. I had assumed he was going to leave, and I should have let him go; it would have been better for the two of us.
"What's wrong?" Slowly, sensing my nervousness, he asked. My trembling was eased when his thumb touched the back of my hand.
"I thought—" I shook my head, deciding to take a deep breath. It would have been too late even if I had succeeded in forcing him to leave without frightening him. "Will you stay for some breakfast?" I didn't realize I needed it until he gave it to me—his eyes lit up, and he smiled slightly.
"Of course." His voice bundled the nerves in my stomach, causing some to feel like silver shots and others like butterflies. I made an attempt to free my hand from his hold, but he wouldn't release me.
Even though my heart was still trying to settle, it had no chance of doing so with him here.
Vera nodded at me as I gestured to the empty table, reading my mind as I met her gaze across the room. I thought Derrick wouldn't have liked the distance it would have caused between us, so I would have gone get the food myself.
I swept my eyes over his face, thinking that if someone was observing us, he would have known because his senses were far keener than mine and he could have detected a threat before I could have. The issue with that was that he didn't realize I posed a threat because he mistakenly believed I was just a straightforward wolf with commitment problems.
My eyes met Vera's when she placed the cakes and coffee on the table, barely a minute later. The sound of the porcelain clattering against the surface made me uneasy. She stepped back and raised an eyebrow at our hand holding while beaming at me.
"There you go; all these pastries and cakes were hand-made by the lovely hands of your mate." As she said it with a smile, my cheeks started to flush. My eyes darted nervously to the man across from me, who hummed at the fact.
"Thank you for that, Vera." I stumbled a little bit.
"My pleasure; if you need anything else, give me a shout." She was leaving before I could say anything. But I could hear the playful tone in her voice.