‘Miss Camilla, what’s wrong?’ He gives me a weird hug, fully capturing my limp form as he holds me still, calming my flailing limbs and keeping me rooted to the spot.
‘We have to stop him … Something’s wrong … I can feel it. Alexi needs to come back.’ It’s out in a whoosh of broken, breathy, tear-laden words as I swallow and choke trying to get them out, and Jackson’s face tightens. A calm coming over him as he seems to understand exactly what I mean and nods in a very soft and fatherly way at me, while patting my back gently. My body is straining and buzzing with energy to run after Alexi, but he’s not letting me.
‘He knows what he is doing, don’t ever question that. Alexi has more instinct for things than any of us, so he wouldn’t go if he didn’t know what he was walking into.’ He squeezes me reassuringly. Still a tight grip, but I shake my head, brushing away his sense and sniffing back a gulp of even more tears.
‘He’s stubborn and pig-headed and sometimes blinded by it. His luck has to run out one day. I need to stop him.’ I wail it at him but Jackson turns me, coercing me into his arm, pushing aside my fight as he slides it around me and walks me back to the lift forcefully.
‘He’s surrounded by men who would take a bullet for him any day of the week. He has nothing to worry about,’ he soothes kindly.
‘Then why does he need a gun with him?’ I baulk desperately.
‘Sometimes he likes to have an extra layer of security. You know him, Miss Camilla; he is always two steps ahead and sees everything coming. He’s going to be just fine!’
Jackson is calming the worst of my hysteria as logic starts to move in and unfog my brain, knowing he is right … In this anyway.
Alexi is what he is because of his crazy skill at reading situations and people, and always being ahead of his game. He’s ruthless, but he’s clever. He wouldn’t walk into a trap without all his avenues being covered and Jackson is right. He is known for overplaying the safety factor. It’s why he is still breathing. It’s why he suffocates me with security and over protectiveness.
‘He told me to make sure you stayed put … To take care of you. Let’s get you upstairs and a drink to calm you down. Alexi will be back by ten or eleven, and you will see for yourself, everything’s fine.’ He is trying so hard to bring back my sanity with soft talk and gentle pats on my shoulder and I stop fighting him, somewhere in my head, I start to listen. Needing this reassurance so badly as nausea circles and swishes my stomach to death. I sniff and brush away the tears, blinking at him in utter vulnerable defeat, clinging to his words.
‘He told you to make me stay? To take care of me?’ I blubber, wiping my cheek with the back of my hand. Jackson nods and I know that Alexi must have known I would follow him down in the state I was in. Stopping me—which only adds fuel to my unease, but I am trying to self-calm before I turn myself inside out with my own over thinking.
‘Mico and Daniels are with him, and he has taken extra men tonight. Two cars … eight men. He’s playing safe and he’s got everyone armed just in case. He knows how to handle this business. He’s had a lifetime doing it.’ Jackson’s words are starting to filter through, making sense of my manic panic and I take long deep breaths, tilting my face up to him very childlike—my voice fragile.
‘Really? You really think so?’ I ask him meekly when the doors slide on us and we are held in the small lift as it starts to move.
‘He plays safe … if he thought he was in real danger, he would never go. He has an ego but he’s not stupid. This business is bigger than him and he knows it. He knows there are people who rely on him being here, so he wouldn’t deliberately throw himself in harm’s way. It’s not how we Carreros operate.’
Jackson is doing a good job of bringing me down, but I am still so completely overwhelmed with the tightening knots of anxiety that are pushing my heart rate to painful rates.
‘Maybe I should call him … to be sure.’ I nod at him erratically, seeking permission, not really inside my own mind and grasping stupidly. I may not have been able to stop him leaving but I can talk to him, hear his voice, and convince him to come back.
‘Maybe, just to put your mind at ease; Get yourself to calm down if he tells you himself, he’s fine—He will be fine. He always is.’ Jackson gives me a small squeeze, I guess to add weight to his words and I swallow down the last of my over emotional outburst.
‘Right … You’re right. I’m being stupid. I don’t need you to come in.’ I nod again letting him go as we open on the apartment floor and give myself a shake. Calmer head on calling Alexi and just trying to stop acting like some irrational psycho having a weird meltdown.
He’s right. This is Alexi’s world … he’s king player for a reason, and I’m sure his gut instincts are a lot better than mine. In fact, I know it. He’s a cold killer with a quick mind and sadistic streak. I know that more than anyone. He’s a name of foreboding for a reason, and he’s made it to thirty-two years old without once coming close to death, as far as I know.