She’s small and brunette, curvy in places with an ample pair of tits and has that exotic brown-eyed beauty of a native Sicilian —Attractive in a wifely, cosy girl next door kind of way. I’m not impressed much by her, and she’s dressed like an Italian peasant right out of a history book. I wonder if it’s the gimmick for this place.
Alexi is as he always is around adoring Carrero women, even though she is not one. Charming, warm and entertaining and seems to think touchy-feely is appropriate as she leans in for an awkward hug that lasts for a few seconds. I watch with a lack of amusement, gut aching a little while I battle the spiralling emotion rising in my stomach of my jealous bitch side clenching her claws into my soul. Bitterness has a horrible taste.
She ignores my presence, even when Alexi says my name mid foreign spew of words, and she barely glances my way. It’s not hard to tell she has a major thing for him and I lift my menu, sighing heavily to block her out, and pretend to be engrossed in something I cannot read rather than witness this vomit inducing show of desperation. There is only so much woman gushing I can take around him, and she will probably be in need of an underwear change after this. I swear she’s on the verge of climaxing from just getting to touch him.
‘Cam?’ Alexi breaks into my thoughts as he nods up to my left and I realise old man is standing with a hot plate already by my side and waiting patiently for space. I guess specials are already made and waiting to be dished. Moving my hands and pushing the menu into the holder in the centre to let him in while he lays a steaming, gorgeous smelling plate in front of me I look up at the duo instead.
Cling-on is standing with one hand on Alexi’s shoulder, possessively, as she takes the plate from her father and lays it before him like she is serving some sort of lord and master, and that’s when I catch it—the flicker of deep infatuation as she fondly eye rapes him. The way she keeps nudging in for bodily contact under the guise of innocence and that sort of obvious intimacy of two people who have definitely seen each other naked. The good little submissive girl pandering to her Dom … Without a shadow of a doubt, I instantly know he’s fucked her.
She’s definitely his type anyway—mousy little ‘Yes, Sir’ with no mind of her own and controlled completely by him just breathing her way. She is practically ready to lick his boots or drop to her knees should he command a fucking blow job. It’s pathetic and I instantly hate her.
I roll my eyes as it dawns on me and my mood takes a severe tumble about three floors down. I doubt there are many women in this city who have crossed his path in life that he hasn’t bedded, but isn’t it sweet he brought me to meet one and have himself a little display in front of my very eyes. Parading exactly what he does in his spare time to wound me in any way he can. He never changes and I fell for another game plan move to piss me off and test how much it gets to me.
The answer is—a fucking lot!
Alexi seems to catch the shift in my mood as I pick up my fork and try to stab my food to death, even though it requires a scooping motion. He mutters something to her, so she looks to me, then him, and waves a little half-hearted hand with a crushing expression of disappointment aimed my way. She walks off in pursuit of her father, who has run off to greet some new guests, with a sour expression. I ignore her departure like it doesn’t matter at all. Not going to show him that I am visualising stabbing her in the throat with my fork and possibly impaling Alexi’s balls straight afterwards.
Alexi watches me for a second, says nothing and then starts eating too. A questioning frown on that serious face. I am just bubbling up inside like a quiet little volcano about to blow her top and inwardly seething.
‘You like?’ he asks after we both down a few mouthfuls in minutes and I just nod disinterestedly, as though I have no need for his company anymore. The food is great, but it could be cardboard for all I care right now. Alexi just has a way of making me feel shit without trying and my taste buds are not really connecting to my brain which has a million things swirling around in the chaos of a bad mood.
I’m jealous—I know that’s what this is and it’s dumb and stupid and ridiculous. I don’t want him. I don’t want to have feelings for him and therefore it shouldn’t bother me. He’s slept with probably hundreds of these mousy doe-eyed girls in his lifetime … It’s nothing to do with me. Yet I cannot help the slicing, sharp stabbing pains in my chest and heart and how close I am to crying. As per usual he has tapped directly into my hormonal flip switch and put me on the cliff edge of weeping like a moron.
‘What’s wrong?’ Alexi questions me again and this time I throw on my fake happy face and beam it at him. Not willing to ever let him see that he STILL gets to me. It will die in time, I’m sure of it. Little displays like this will kill what is left of my beating heart soon enough.
‘Nothing … enjoying my food. I was starving,’ I answer emotionlessly, and he just frowns harder at me.
‘We both have pasts, Cam.’ He offers as a way of explanation, clearly honing in on what he thinks my problem is, but I won’t give him the benefit of the doubt. I won’t let him know that it bothers me.
Business—that is all.
‘We sure do … I’m just enjoying my food, Alexi, nothing else,’ I repeat flatly, eyes on the food and not him, even though I can see him in my peripheral vision, and he is still looking at me.
Alexi sighs, his face losing all hints of anything I can read as he just tucks into his too; Glances pulling my attention every so often as we eat in silence and awkwardness grows between us again.
See, this is why it should always just be about business when it comes to us.
‘You want to talk about the club … or eat and go?’ Alexi’s mood has nosedived, evident by the edge in his voice and I just shrug, not feeling this anymore anyway, and throw him another mock smile that is meant to conceal anything deeper going off in my brain.
‘It’s getting late, we should really move.’ I offer as way of an answer and I catch the closing down of his emotions in the flicker of a blink. I see it, the tiny tell of a man who just gave up trying. He looks at his food, concentrates on eating quickly, and sticks to downing water to wash it away.
I, however, quite happily slosh down the red wine like an alcoholic when annoying girl comes and pours it for me. I throw her a salacious look to try and hide how much I wish she would just go away and choke, but she lingers like a bad smell, and my hatred and anger only multiplies with every second she is here. Until the air around me is so toxic it’s almost tinted green with how much venom I am excreting.
‘We don’t need anything else. Thanks.’ Alexi dismisses her coolly and her crumpled expression and quick departure do nothing to ease my rage.
We eat in less than fifteen minutes, both clearing plates without any interaction, or seemingly enjoying what had the potential to be amazing food, and act like nothing is amiss between us. Alexi gets up first and wanders over to the till seemingly ignoring me. I get up and wander to wait by the exit.
When he pays the old man, he has a bit of a sentimental goodbye with them, obvious friendship on show. I stand back by the door and look disinterested; trying to look anywhere but at him.