‘I wish I could; you have no idea.’ Alexi slumps back into his seat and just stares at the ceiling for a moment, deflated and almost exhausted. His brimming prick has subsided and he seems a hell of a lot less aggressive so quickly. I know it’s an act and I don’t buy anything he says.
‘So, it’s my fault now is it? … Some weird pull to make my life an endless misery?’ I laugh sardonically, enraged at such a stupid statement.
Fucking prick.
Alexi looks across at the people climbing over seats to get closer together and the merry atmosphere and sighs again. His whole demeanour has lost that intimidation and he just seems like he did when we arrived, only not so happy anymore.
‘You have no clue, London. Can we stop fighting and just forget this shit until tomorrow? I brought you here to have fun, not a battle, not drama and you upset. I brought you because I am trying to treat you how you deserve to be treated. I am TRYING to make you feel like I want you in my life, even if you don’t see it. I don’t do words … I act. I show, not tell. I’m not the best when it comes to talking, about anything … but I’m trying, Cam. ’
He turns back to me and it completely shuts me up, all my feelings falling into a heavy pit into my shoes as his words render me speechless. He’s looking at me, and for a moment a flicker of something is there. A look at me that makes my heart flip over, a look so similar to how Gino looked at Alessandra, a small speck of something warm, longing looks, and then BAM … it’s gone and there’s nothing once more. No anger, no emotion, just a blank look that tells me he’s closed up back inside his head but his words seemed genuine.
My rage fizzles a little but I’m not that dumb to let my guard down. With him, it will always be up. He lies, it’s second nature and I know it.
Pondering the meaning, too emotionally distraught to think about this right now, and aware this isn’t the best place for an all-out screaming match, I let it go. He is Alexi after all, and we have an audience. I wouldn’t put it past him to gag me, tie me up and stuff me in the overhead locker for the rest of this trip.
I glance past him at his family and relent.
‘You have a funny way of showing it then! Fine … Truce. Not that I believe you, but because I cannot be bothered with this anymore and you are giving me a headache and killing my buzz.’ Now I am the one sulking and being childish and when Alexi leans out and drags two glasses from the table across the aisle to come back with, I take one with a glare. Accepting the drink but letting him know he still pisses me off and this isn’t over. I can’t ever trust him. A temporary lull in our war means nothing. I need time to regroup and come back stronger.
He clinks his glass against the top of mine and throws me a weird look.
‘To us!’ He says drily, sarcastically and I just eyeroll dramatically. Getting my crazy under control and finding Camilla’s cold sass instead.
‘Match made in hell; Just fucking perfect.’
I down my drink in one and push the empty glass on the table in front of me briskly, turning to stare out of the window instead of at him, and he falls silent beside me and lets out a subtle heavy sigh.