He’s the exact same as he was months ago. Clean-shaven, a little too gorgeous for mere mortals, with soulless grey eyes, yet there’s a hint of something new I never noticed before.
He feels my eyes on him and glances at me for a second, locking onto my blues and I see it more intensely. A weird softness in place of what used to be utter cold. It’s around his eyes, his mouth, that icy, harsh and sadistic that I always saw there seems to have calmed a little, and when he looks at me, instead of hatred, I can’t decipher what is there instead. Something that turns my insides to mush. I lose my nerve and look back at the gun, heart fluttering strangely and once again a little breathless … I lose my courage.
‘It’s heavy and my arms are getting sore. Can we pick this up tomorrow Lexi? I need to start making calls on my to-do list.’ I appeal to that kinder side I feel coming from him in a bid to escape.
‘Lexi?’ That cute boy smile hits me from far right and is completely unexpected.
‘I meant … Alexi,’ I stutter and instantly flush. I didn’t mean to shorten his name to sound affectionate, it was a slip of the tongue and his disarming response signals end of gun lesson. I hand it over with a quick tight smile and avoid looking at him directly. Panic over taking as things get weird. Even Alexi seems to visibly shake himself and turns as awkwardly as me.
‘I like it. I have dinner plans so yeah; I need to get going.’ He avoids looking at me.
‘Yeah, whatever. So, till tomorrow. I have things to do now.’ I slide away and keep my eyes on the ground as I walk, high tailing it away from him and I know I am running—mentally and emotionally. Like Speedy Gonzales at a hundred miles an hour.
‘Tomorrow,’ He repeats after me, his eyes flicking to my departing body as I throw him back a flash of smile and a wave, getting to the door and realise I should take some papers with me to look over upstairs. I am completely aware of the atmosphere and tension getting too heavy to breathe between us, and watch absent-mindedly as though I have no idea how to act. He takes everything from his desk and I assume it’s all going back into his safe.
I don’t even want to dissect those last seconds and just focus on what I have to get done tonight.
I figure I should grab my phone and clipboard and work through the calls and arrangements I need to make. I also have to track down a marble restorer to fix the bloody bar if that is even possible. Replacing it is costly and time-consuming and we had to wait eight weeks the last time before they came and fitted it.
That got a little too weird for me and the best thing to do when it gets like that is to remove myself from anywhere near him. Take myself out of the equation and give him space until it passes.
‘I need to stay upstairs tonight.’ He adds it; just as I swipe the stuff I want from the spare desk and head to the door. My hand halts on the handle, stomach dropping like a lead weight, and I fumble. This is the last thing I need, and I can hardly tell him he can’t stay in his own apartment after he literally just showed me he bought me a gun out of the need to protect me.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Bastard is softening my resolve and I don’t like it.
‘Sure, whatever. I’ll keep out of your way.’ I try to sound disinterested and yank the door open instead. Making sure he knows it will be what it will be—Him in his room and me in mine. No confusion about that. Act like I do not give a rat’s arse and him staying there has absolutely no effect on me whatsoever! In case he’s testing me. I just hope I have the strength to deal with him bringing a playmate.
‘I can deal with that.’ The soft tone is almost sexy, and I drown out that husky devil voice and march out of the office instead. Determined to get myself back on top and focus on the club.
I shut my brain off as efficiently as possible and refuse to pull apart my thoughts and feelings as my insides spiral out of control.
I wave at Mico as I pass and get a charming smile and wave back before I hit the lift, walking in when it opens and turn to rest against the back wall.
As I do so my eyes automatically pan in the open door of the office facing me, and I see Alexi standing looking right back. Hands in his pockets and casually watching me as if he has nothing better to be doing. It makes me uncomfortable, and then he smiles softly at me as the door closes and I swear my heart flips over.
Fuck.