I walk until I feel like I can’t anymore, not that I have got very far, and sit on a bench to try and regain some of my energy. Tired, fed up and drumming my brain on what I should do. My body is in no fit state for a hike, and I am so breathless and faint that walking all the way home looks like it’s going to take hours. I am moving at a snail’s pace.
I still have to pick up a paper and start scanning the ads for a new job, figure out how the hell to keep my landlord at bay without resorting to oral pleasure and get home before it gets dark and too dodgy to be out and about my own neighbourhood.
I am so stressed out already that the thought of curling up on this bench and going to sleep seems like a much better option. I have already lost all the excess heat from being in a steam room all morning, and I am starting to shiver as my body adjusts to being outside—which only serves to make me feel worse in general.
I pull out my phone to see if I have any internet data left, in the hopes of doing a local job search for something that might interview this afternoon and give me a closer destination to aim for. I see a text waiting instead.
It’s from Mico.
‘Just remember, the offer will still stand no matter how long you take to think about it. We are at the club for the next few days. M X’
I am guessing this was his reply to my earlier message and has been sat waiting.
I sigh as I read it, absent-mindedly chew my lip and drop my phone into my lap in complete frustration, blowing out air. My mind is in overdrive at my predicament and seeing the possibility of a solution as I start picking at my chipped nails.
The club is closer to me than home is, and maybe if I swing by and ask for Mico, he can drive me back to my apartment—one last favour before I cut ties once more and send him on his way. His text changes nothing. My mind is already made up on that front but I know what he’s like. If I go there to see him and say thanks for my apartment, he will offer to take me home without me asking. I know he will, especially if they are trying to keep me sweet and consider the offer.
I sit and hum over it for a few minutes, really torn about going there but the grey skies moving overhead and the distant rumble of thunder make up my mind for me.
I can’t sit out here in a storm. I’m already sick enough, and if I start walking, I won’t be halfway home before I get soaked through and probably pass out with the effort.
I also happen to have a major fear of lightning and the crackling sky fills me with a huge sense of foreboding. I have many memories of hiding under beds during raging thunder and lightning storms and it still makes me shake. The clapping, snapping flash of that high volt dagger like energy and being stuck in it is not my idea of a fun walk.
The club is maybe three blocks at the most, practically on my doorstep when I worked here, and if I move my arse, I might get there before the rain lashes down on me and puts me out of action for longer.
It’s mid-afternoon and chances are that Alexi might not even be there. I mean, he is a busy guy after all. Mico is a phone call away and would easily make one of the club staff drive me if he isn’t able to see me.
I really just need to get home and think about what I am going to do from here on in. I have to make three dollars stretch food wise until I can get a cash-in-hand position somewhere fast and it’s not really asking him for more help if I show up and he offers. So, it’s not like I am abusing his kindness really.
The clap of lightning in the far distance makes me jump a mile high, heart somersaulting and hammering like a war drum and motivates me to move. I get up and walk south at speed, even with a tired body and woozy head. One thing that has always made me jumpy is exposure to full-blown storms. Nothing will energise you like fear does.