Nicole sat by the fireplace as the hand of the clock ticked and the year ran out, it was less than three hours to the new year and she sat there just looking, she couldn't join in many fun activities because she was still not fully fine, her parents were in their room and her sister had been talking with the staff, she seems to have gotten close to them, and they really like her, Nicole was happy Natalie was finally and fully getting herself back, she had spent the whole day in bed, hoping to recover but she didn't, she didn't want to self medicate so she decided she would go to the hospital if her symptoms persisted, she knew all she needed to do was rest, she had gotten tired of laying in bed which is why she had gotten up and used her strength to come here and sit, and she has been staring at the fire and just being there.
Her mom walked out of the room she shared with her dad and came to sit with her.
"Hey, Mom,"
She said weakly.
"My dear, what are you doing here all by yourself? I thought you were out playing midnight games with the others,"
"No mom, I need to rest,"
"Oh, that's good,"
Her mom responded and they sat in silence for a while before her mom asked her a question.
"We haven't really talked about it but I want to know my dear, are you okay?"
"What do you mean mom? I am fine, aside from the fact that I am kind of tried, I am cool,"
"No, I don't mean your physical appearance, I am talking about emotionally, I know I should have had this discussion with you a long time ago but I didn't know from where to start from, I have no experience, you see your dad, he is the only one I have been with and we have been together since forever, I have no idea what a break up feels like so I didn't know how best to talk about it with you, I still don't know right now but I can't keep looking,"
"Are you talking about my divorce mom?"
"Yes, my dear, I know that must have been hard,"
"Yes, mom, it was, it still is,"
She said truthfully, she didn't want to hide anything from her mom, she was grateful that she wanted to talk to her about it.
"It will get better okay? You can talk to me, I will listen, just don't keep it all in, a problem shared is a problem half solved,"
"It's not even a problem mom, it's just something I have to leave me, I have gone through the different stages and phases and I am at the stage of acceptance right now, I have gone through confusion, heartbreak, denial, and even expectations but right now, I have nothing else left but to accept that this is how it is going to be,"
"And you still love him?"
"Yes, I still do, with all of my heart, I don't think I will ever stop,"
She said sincerely, she couldn't lie and say she didn't love him anymore, she was afraid that she might never stop loving him and getting hurt by his actions, but that didn't have to be a fault or a weakness, it should be a strength.
"Yes my dear, love is a strength, not a weakness, and some love last us forever,"
"Like you and Dad?"
"Yes, like us, don't get me wrong, we have had our own shared of misunderstandings, we just kind of find a way to work it out, I wish you and your husband had to,"
"Me too mom, but, not everything turned out fine and I learned a lot, don't worry I am doing fine,"
"That's good to know, but you know, when you are not fine, it's okay to cry too and be sad, don't pretend to be happy when you are not, that does more harm than good,"
Her mom advised.
"I promise I won't do that mom, thank you so much, I love you,"
"I love you too my dear,"
Her mom said and they both sat in silence until her mom got up, bid her good night, and left.
After her talk with her mom, she decided to turn in for the night, there was so much noise in the mansion as the staff and Natalie were having some kind of party, more like a game and they were all happily shouting, she couldn't join in and so she decided to just go into her room where she won't hear the noise, she managed to take a bath got dressed in warm sleeping clothes and got into her bed, she hated feeling sick and wished it didn't happen today of all day.
*****
"How can you spend New year's Eve locked up at home? We are going out, I thought you agreed New year will be wild, and think that's going to happen if you spend all your day of the last day of the year in bed?"
Natalie asked dragging her out of the bed, all her thoughts and hope of sleeping until the new year flying out of the window as Natalie clearly had other ideas, she wasn't letting her have her peace.
"I don't have the strength to go out, I don't want to collapse in public,"
She lamented urging her sister to leave her be but Natalie was taking no for an answer.
"That's an excuse, we aren't even going far from home, there is a carnival going on within the neighborhood and we can just stay there and watch, and exchange hugs when the year runs out, it doesn't require a lot of strength,"
"Can't you just let me have this?"
"If I do that would I be me letting you weakly start the new year, let's go already, the guys are going and I told them I will bring you along, don't worry even the bodyguards are coming so we will be safe if that's what you are worried about?"
Natalie said trying to push her into coming.
"I am not worried for our safety, I just don't want to go anywhere,"