'If only wishes were horses, beggars would ride', Habib thought to himself.
He could recall the days with Salamat. They were always contesting on who was the best writer.
Then, he scribbled on his notepad.
Here I am, me who found love in a good soul,
But lost it.
Here I am, craving.
Making the good old memories lingering in my heart a thing of regret.
Here I am, really wishing you were here or I was there.
Here I am, living a life of remorse.
Wishing I can have a taste of your love.
How can I have you? I keep asking myself.
How can I stop my heart from fluttering?
Where can I find the bonds that ache
Bonds that will break love.....
The love I have for you.
Habib dropped his pen and was lost in thought for a while. He remembered a quote he saw in one of Salamat's books, then he opened a new page.
Humans are born with a sinful nature. We all have that kind of nature, only that we choose to sin in more respectable ways. People don't have to be crooks unless they choose to. We humans don't have to follow every evil thought that comes to our mind. We don't have to listen or allow ourselves to be influenced negatively by others.
Habib stopped for a while and heaved a sigh. Then, he continued;
We know the things we plan to do are wrong but we still want to do them to satisfy our selfish purpose; lust, greed, and love for money. Why can't we make ours different? Why can't we make our behaviors towards life unique?
He dropped his pen and stood up to observe his Asr prayers. He went into his bathroom and quietly performed his ablution. Then, he went back into his room to observe his prayer.
After he was released on bail, he isolated himself from the rest of his family members and even his friends, out of guilt. Good memories of being with Salamat made him smile while he winced at the bad memories. He regretted them and they made him weep.
A week earlier, he heard the conversation between his mother and sister and he got to know the truth. He got to know it was a conspiracy between them.
His sister lied about Salamat going to the hotel just to cover up for her actions. She was the real culprit while his mother covered up for her daughter's act because of the hatred she had for the Ademolas. Her mother claimed she detests seeing her son with Salamat.
Damola's action made Habib realized that a true friend is the one that makes your life better and not otherwise.
Habib was determined and willing to go to any length to ask for Salamat's forgiveness. Exams were to start the following week but he wasn't even concentrating in class.
He hoped for a miracle.
After the obligatory prayer, Habib raised his palm to the sky and invoked with guilt. "Oh, Lord! Forgive me all my mistakes and shortcomings and show me your mercy."
He supplicated continuously till he drifted off to sleep on his prayer mat.
******
"This is an abominable act", Bimpe told her brother.
I'm sorry", Ayoade apologized with remorse.
'How will the world believe that this is a mistake? Who will believe us? How can two siblings have sex? Oh, Lord! I am doomed', Bimpe thought to herself.
She sobbed and looked up to her brother. "I think I am pregnant."
"What!", He exclaimed in shock. He moved closer to her. "We can't keep the baby. Dad will kill us if he gets to know."
"Now you know what we did is wrong. After the first mistake, you kept asking for more. You didn't even give me the space to have a boyfriend. I regret having you as a brother."
"Bimpe, I am deeply sorry. I did not mean to hurt you. I was carried away. Besides, you walked in on me at the wrong time, I couldn't help it."
She could remember walking in on him when he was engrossed in a movie on his phone. She ignorantly ventured into his room to show him the dress she saw on her phone when she caught him watching porn. Though, she was no longer a virgin but watching a blue film was new to her.
Her brother was embarrassed, having been caught in the act of watching porn. He was on the verge of masturbating when she came in. He was surprised when he saw her sitting beside him with mouth agape. That was not what he expected. He expected her to shout at him like she always does whenever he did something wrong or run out of his room to inform his parents.
But instead, she sat on the three-seater and watched the movie with him. The movie was about to end and he was aroused from the performance. Then, his sister looked at him with surprise written all over her.
Forgetting the blood and bond that connected them as siblings, he took her lips.
She kissed him back like an experienced pornstar. It was heavenly. That was when it dawned on him, that his sister was already sexually active. He wanted to shout at her for being loose but he was already lost.
He couldn't take it anymore and before he knew it, he had sex with his sister.
He became addicted to her. His sister, on the other hand, became addicted to watching a porn movie. They had sex on several occasions. Their parents were not always home and this gave them the liberty to do whatever they wanted to do in any part of the house.
The front door was always locked and they enjoyed themselves wherever they found themselves, even in the kitchen.
They were oblivious to the dangers and taboos attached to incest. But it was beginning to dawn on them now.
His sister was pregnant for him.
'My brother is a fool', Bimpe thought to herself.
"Bimpe, say something", Ayoade said.
Bimpe was looking into space and thinking of the way out of the mess her brother had created.
He moved close to her and lifted her head with his fingers. He stared into her eyes and called her. "Bimbim."
Bimpe stared back with her thoughts far away. Then he kissed her again. Bimpe was almost lost before she came out of her reverie.
"What sort of a person are you? We aren't done with the mess you have created and you want to bring another one. You are a foolish person."
"What rubbish are you saying?"
"That is the truth. I hate you for doing this to me", Bimpe sobbed again as she started for the door.
"Bimpe", he called. "I said I'm sorry. It's not my fault."
"Then, whose fault is it?", Bimpe retorted back turning to face him.
Ayoade scratched his head. "Bimpe, you shouldn't have entered my room without knocking. If you had......"
"Keep shut. You are a fool", she yelled and ran out of the room.
She entered her room and shut the door.
'My brother is a devil. He won't stop having sex with me. I need to be far from him. What do I do?'
Then she slumped onto the bed and cried out her heart.