I'm watching it for the first time. I'm irritated by your territoriality. When did our game become a conquest over the other? Did he think that by kissing me he was passing me off as his own name? Even Elliot wouldn't be such a jerk!
I prepare to tell him that, but then the choir finishes singing. The church is absolutely silent as the children return the microphones and Father Abeille stands up. I swallow my words, and my pride, like they're thorns.
LeBlanc's green eyes lock on mine, daring me to say what I want.
- Children - whispers the priest - Let's say the last prayer. All standing.
The whole church stands up, including me and the man next to me.
- I'm going to get ready to confess - I'm warning.
I prepare to exit on the right so I don't have to pass between LeBlanc and the front seat. However, I stop when I hear his voice, low and soft, say:
- Need a priest?
I'm freezing. Oh yeah, we've been here before. Him in the confessional, me on the other side, telling truths that wouldn't come out of my mouth if Father Bee were there. I knew he wasn't.
I remember the feeling perfectly. I knew I was doing wrong - that I was sinning - but I didn't care. I spent my teenage years being the perfect girl, and I was dying to be mean. To be myself.
I slowly turn to him. When our eyes meet, LeBlanc knows the answer. That's what we do when we're together, isn't it? We enforce these insignificant little rules.
LeBlanc exits through the side aisle. His steps are calm, but determined, as he heads down the hallway that leads to the confessional.
It might be fear, but I feel my heart slam in my throat just imagining being caught. I can't imagine how badly the whole community would talk about it.
I take a long breath. The consequences will come in the future, so that's where I'll deal with them. There is a rosary hanging around my neck and I slip it into my dress. While the priest is finishing his prayer, I go to the side of the pews and head towards the confessional.
My heels click on the floor as I approach that stuffy little room down the hall. Confessing, until recently, meant getting rid of the guilt that sin had caused me. I don't know when it ceased to be a sacred temple for me.
I stop at the last damn door. The surrounding walls echo with my hectic breathing. For a second, I think about going back to mass. Give up on this crazy idea. However, my body reacts before my common sense. Next thing I know I've already turned the handle and pushed the door open.
I see the confessional in the corner of the room. I approach and kneel in front of the black screen. Head down.
Inhale.
Expired.
"Father," I whisper.
I focus on what is right. Adrenaline rushes through my blood. The feeling that I have never been more alive than now. A light spirit, because I don't have to worry about what I look like; I am fair.
- Girl - when her voice comes to me, I breathe a sigh of relief.
I bite my lower lip to stifle my smile.
- I'm nervous - I admit.
I remember saying those same words when I first went to confession. It was Father Bee on the other end, and my confessions were just the rambling sentences of an innocent child.
- Do you want to come here? So I hear better.
One question... he didn't ask me to go. He asked me if I wanted to go.
My eyes widen, though I'm sure he doesn't see it. I wonder where LeBlanc's limits are. I think of the rosary around my neck, but it doesn't seem to be helping me much as I find myself getting up and walking towards the small dark wooden confessional door.
I open the door and pull her slowly. I'm trying to convince my head that we're not going too far. It's just a prank of two people who apparently didn't have a childhood.
The confessional is dark inside. There is only light that penetrates through the screen. LeBlanc is sitting on the wooden bench, his right ankle resting on his left knee. Her green eyes twinkle as she gazes at my face.
I close the door behind me, then the small space becomes even smaller and darker.
He holds out his hand to me. Accepted.
He pulls me closer to him. Accepted.
He lowers the leg that was resting on his knee and takes me on his lap. Accepted.
Our gaze remains connected for the next few minutes. I sit on top of him, my legs wrapped around his body. I place my hands on his broad shoulders. The only thing between us is clothes. Otherwise, I can feel every part of your body.
Inspector Pierce, you didn't warn me... did you?
"You've done this before," he said. I frantically shake my head. Not really - If you admit it - clarifies. This time I confirm. Yes, I've done it literally a million times - So do it one more time.
His hands squeeze my hips. Our lips are close, and it reminds me of their taste. With each warm breath, I feel him closer.
LeBlanc takes a deep breath. His green eyes are almost all I can see, and they rest on my mouth. When he looks at me, he sees me. He sees everything I've tried to hide, even from myself. He sees and desires.
"Do it," he repeats, more firmly now.
- I have sinned, Father - I repeat the words that I always said when I went to confession. Words that, until then, were sacred.
- And even? - he asks. I agree - Tell me, my daughter, that I can forgive you.
He settles under me, which causes his hips to rise, brushing against me. I hug your shoulders tighter.
- I... - I stop when he approaches. LeBlanc pushes my hair back and presses his lips to my throat. I let out a long sigh, like a moan.
- proceed
- I cheated on my boyfriend - I admit it. He smiles against my neck.
I want more. I want him to touch me in forbidden places. I want to feel bad leaving here and remember what I did. I want to commit the greatest sin possible.
One of his hands goes up on my belly. And even if the dress does not allow me to feel her skin, I shiver.
I tilt my head back, giving him more room on my neck. I move my hips, first in a circle, just to test the feel. I press, because nothing seems to be enough to fill the void in me. I feel him stiffen under me, and I keep moving in search of more.
- Are you sorry?
- No... - I'm stammering.
- Then why are you here?
His mouth slides down my neck, and it's so delicious that I can feel the contact between my legs. LeBlanc grabs the back of my hair, pulling me towards him. His mouth hovers over mine, and I can see his efforts to control himself. His jerky breathing, his tense body, his clenched jaw...
- Because I still want to sin - I answer.
I jump when his mouth collides with mine. I feel it everywhere. A hand is on my hip, guiding my movements, rubbing our bodies against each other. The other hand holds my hair in a fist.
Your tongue tastes of danger. All around us there are sighs and the sounds of fabrics rubbing against each other. Suddenly your hands change. He pulls the dress up to my hips and squeezes my buttocks, with no more tissue between our skins.
Our tongues curl and slip. His teeth brush against my lips from time to time. All of this, combined with the big hands squeezing my ass, forms a pool between my legs.
I break the kiss by throwing my head back. It's so good I can barely think. LeBlanc kisses my neck, then moves down to the bulge of my breasts.
- Fucking hell - he mutters - You're my fucking shit.
The pain between my legs increases every second. I close my eyes, very close to cumming, as I continue to rub against him.
"Oh my God," I sigh.
I feel my body tense, my toes tucking into my heels and my sweaty back against the dress. I'm giving myself completely to the moment, and that's my mistake. The onset of an orgasm is interrupted when the door to the room is opened, then a flash comes in.
LeBlanc thinks faster than me, as one of his hands quickly covers my mouth while the other cups my hip, freezing our movements. We freeze when we see someone walk into the room, looking around as if looking for something.
- For God! Where did I put my glasses? - I recognize Father Bee's voice.
I hold my breath, afraid to make the slightest noise. My heart leaps into my throat, and the worst part is feeling my body on fire even more. LeBlanc is always hard between my legs. Your hands are always on me. His mouth blows hot air on my neck.
The priest searches a bit more, but he doesn't seem to find him. He's looking towards the confessional, and I don't know if he saw us or not. All I know is that he wisely chose to leave the room. Then, just then, I breathe again. Relax against LeBlanc.
His hand frees my mouth and moves to the side. He grabs something, but I can't see what. Space is so limited that I can't even turn around. When LeBlanc's hand returns, I can see that he has brought the vial of holy water. He pours some of the liquid on his own index finger.
LeBlanc brings his newly "sanctified" finger closer. He makes the sign of the cross on my forehead, and at that moment I can't contain my laughter. It has to be the greatest sin anyone ever committed in the church.
- And may God forgive us our sins - he said repeating the words of the Father at the beginning of the mass.