But her perspective only changed when she lost her freedom. She suddenly realized that every small rebellion counted.
The more you were controlled, the more you would want to control, even the smallest thing... Like eating... If she went on binge eating, then she would realize that at least there was something in her life she controlled.
’’Ruby!" Ella walked over when the girl did not budge. By the time she made it to the girl, she bent over and panted with her palms on her knees, ’’No wonder you did not respond to me. Only after walking here did I realize that you were sitting rather far away to hear me."
Ruby’s red hair draped over her shoulders as she leaned forward, lost in her thoughts.
Without raising her head to look at her, she said, ’’You are wrong.’’
’’Hmm?" Ella blinked, ’’Haha, to be honest, I am wrong about many things but umm, which part are you exactly referring to?"
’’I heard you when you called me.’’
’’But I chose not to respond,’’ Ruby picked up a fallen leaf and blew over it, dusting off the sand that stuck to it.
In short: Oh, your presence is so unappreciated and unasked for. Get the fuck out of my sight.
However, how could Ella do what she was told just like that?
After one life of living like a nuisance, if there was something she had gained, that was the skin of a rhino.
Thick. Very thick. Even a bullet can’t penetrate through it!
Let alone a few glares... One that was even from a pretty girl... ahem ahem...
Almost on instinct, Ella looked around just to make sure that the big devil was nowhere close enough to see through her thoughts!
"See, sometimes we hesitate, thinking we don’t want something, only to realize later we did. Like when you turn down an invitation just to sit at home feeling miserable. See, I am an adult now yet, for god’s sake, I have difficulties choosing the food that I want to eat... Ah, I can’t even decide if I want to eat the same old chocolate ice cream or try something new...’’
The more she spoke, the further Ruby’s face resembled a scrunched paper.
But Ella was far from giving up, ’’...Hence, although you chose not to respond to me, I am afraid that was a wrong choice that you made. In momentary impulse or distractedness. And this choice... you might regret later. Being the good friend that I have the potential to be, I will invite myself in and give you the chance to respond to me from now on."
’’We are not friends and I do not want to respond.’’
Ella smiled, her cheeks bulged.
Ella swayed her index finger from left to right, "Now those are two different concepts again. How certain are you that you did not want to respond to me? And if you are certain about it, then how certain are you about your certainty...?"
The sly arc of her lips revealed her dimples, that were once sharp and now appeared softer beneath the fullness of her cheeks.
’’...Because at the end of the day, what you want and what you think you want might not align with each other. And even if they align! Even if you don’t want to respond to me, so what? What about my wants? Have you asked me about what I want? So, we need to meet halfway. What you want, what I want—let’s negotiate. No choice is one-sided!’’
Ella was preaching non-stop with her eyes closed.
It was only when she opened her eyes did she realize that the girl sitting under the tree was nowhere to be seen.
Did I push her buttons too hard?
Ruby walked away from the tree as far as she could but suddenly, a huge shadow blocked her.
Startled, she retreated on instinct.
The shadow jumped over and she was suddenly captured in a fluffy embrace.
This... gave her deja vu.
But unlike last time, they did not go tumbling down when Ella pounced on Ruby because Ella retreated in time.
However before Ruby could distance herself, the girl grabbed her hand.
’’Fine, I’ll listen to what you want. But as my only friend, you should listen to me too. That’s how friendship works, right? Only when we listen to each other’s wants and try to fulfill them can we reach the pinnacle of this world,’’ As she spoke, she self-righteously erected her hand in the direction of high-heavens..ahem... blue sky.
Ruby: "_" Get off the pinnacle of your delusions first.
She exhaled sharply. "You talk too much." Ruby tried to pull her hand back.
’’Eh? You want to go? Go then!" Ella flung her hand away gently.
Ruby frowned, suspicious of her sudden actions.
’’Didn’t you want to spend some time by yourself before going to the car?"
Clearly, she did not expect anyone to guess her intentions.
Ella could see the shock in her eyes and her fingers clenched. Pain and a pang of guilt mingled in her heart.
Even though they were friends once, Ella lived in her own world and barely cared about Ruby.
Ruby knew her likes and dislikes, cared about her, validated her during times of insecurities which was all-the-damn-fucking-time and she was everything one would ever want in a friend. When nobody stood up for Ella, Ruby was there.
Yet when Ruby crumbled down, Ella was nowhere.
Ella simply cared too much about herself to think of anyone else.
Hence, when Ruby was struggling and suffering, Ella did not notice. When Ruby’s world collapsed, when she could not go on and decided to give up on everything, all that was left in Ella’s heart was bitterness.
This girl who wore a cold face and refused to talk to her now, came almost crawling to the Eve Mansion in torrential downpour after she had a miscarriage after she heard from Esther that Ella was sick.
And what did Ella do at that time?
A/N: Sweeties, support Ella and Adrian with plenty of power stones and help us rise up the rankings~