"It’s my fault," Tangmo lowered her head, her eyes starting to blur with tears. She closed her eyes, saying in pain, "If I hadn’t been so naive back then, if I hadn’t thought about saving people, Luo’er wouldn’t have had that accident. That day, he was comforting me outside the office corridor, believing that what I did was right, that I did no wrong. But does he not know? Compared to what the world calls justice, I just wish he could have stayed by my side, safe and sound."
"Um, no, Sister Moumou, you..." Hu Daoke reached out his hand trying to comfort her, sensing that Tangmo was in an unusual mood.
Tangmo sniffled, then with a tearful voice, said: "Thank you, thank you, Little Ke, thank you for letting me know about this. I need to calm down a bit..."
With that, she began to wander aimlessly, staring blankly ahead. Seeing her , Hu Daoke instinctually tried to stop her. After all, it was pitch dark and the direction she was heading was towards the wilderness of the forest, who knows what dangers she might encounter.
Suddenly, without a backward glance, Tangmo extended her hand that held a magic wand. Taken by surprise, Hu Daoke collided headfirst into an invisible barrier, grinning in pain.
"I’m sorry, Little Ke, I need to be by myself for a bit, please don’t follow me, okay?" Tangmo pleaded without turning back.
"Sister Moumou, it’s late at night, it’s too dangerous for you to go out alone!" Hu Daoke hastily stated.
"It’s okay, I can take care of myself. Don’t worry about me, it’s not worth it," Tangmo’s voice got increasingly quieter. From her voice, Hu Daoke could sense the profound guilt and despair in her heart.
He again attempted to follow Tangmo, but she was too responsive, instantly casting another barrier to block him. Seeing that catching up was futile, Hu Daoke watched her retreating back, his teeth clenched, before turning to run towards the villa.
He realized he had created trouble, under the current circumstances, only Luo’er could help. Following closely behind Tangmo was pointless, she wasn’t some powerless girl after all, but a rather competent soldier.
Hu Daoke ran all the way to the villa’s room where Luo’er was doing a nightly check with a candle, looking at the return of the latecomers.
Seeing Hu Daoke run towards him panting heavily, he couldn’t help but frown, then rebuked in a scolding tone: "So late, yet you are not resting, running all around!"
"Chief, something has happened!" Hu Daoke ran up to him, anxiously grabbing his hand.
"What happened?" Seeing Hu Daoke in such a state, Luo’er immediately frowned, his expression instantly becoming serious.
"That is..." Hu Daoke had barely started to speak when he began to pant uncontrollably.
"Slow down, catch your breath first!" Luo’er advised, looking worried.
"Yes, sorry, chief, I... I told Sister Moumou about your condition." Taking a deep breath, Hu Daoke promised him timidly.
"My what?" Luo’er asked, furrowing his brows.
"That," biting his teeth, Hu Daoke glanced at him, and with a guilty face admitted, "I told her about your illness."
"My... illness?" Luo’er paused for a moment, before asking in astonishment, "How do you know about my... my situation?"
"That day, I overheard your conversation in the toilet," Hu Daoke stuttered, then quickly raised his hands defensively, "I mean, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop!"
Luo’er dismissed his apology and anxiously asked, "And then you told Moumou about my illness?"
"Yes, yes," Hu Daoke explained, "Because, because it seems that everyone is isolating her, making her feel helpless as she knows nothing about the situation, so..."
"You really are..." Luo’er sighed, unsure of how to reprimand him, "So that’s why I didn’t want you to know about my illness!"
"Yes, I’m sorry!" Hu Daoke lowered his head, apologizing like a child that had made a mistake.
"And then?" Luo’er pressed.
"Then, then Sister Moumou seemed to be very upset, she said she wanted to calm down and went into the forest alone." Hu Daoke informed.
"It’s the middle of the night right now, and you just let her go to the forest alone?" Luo’er burst out in anger as soon as he heard these words. He couldn’t help but cough in pain, obviously agitated.
"No, chief, don’t get angry, Sister Moumou didn’t allow me to follow her, she wanted to be alone. I wanted to follow her, but she used magic to prevent me from going with her." Hu Daoke said grievously.
"And then you came back to report to me?" Luo’er inquired.
"Hmm, I reckon you might be the only one who could persuade her, so..."
Hu Daoke’s words were cut short by Luo’er, who anxiously inquired, "Which direction did Moumou go?"
"Well, towards ten o’clock facing the main entrance." Hu Daoke pointed at a general direction.
"Alright, I’ll go find her, you go notify everyone else to head out as well!" Luo’er interrupted him once more and began running in the direction indicated.
"Chief, you should take some tools or something, it’s very dangerous!" Hu Daoke shouted worriedly behind him.
"Stop wasting time and go notify everybody!" Luo’er responded without turning back.
Luo’er had always had a complex feeling towards Tangmo that he couldn’t quite articulate. He wouldn’t dare say that he liked Tangmo, yet he couldn’t bear to see her upset and sad. For Luo’er, as long as he could see her smiling happily each day, he wouldn’t mind getting hurt.
Luo’er didn’t know how to describe this feeling. He wished that Tangmo could mature a little, which would lessen his burden. But on the other hand, he also hoped that Tangmo could retain her innocence and kindness. And even if this came with a high cost, he felt it was worth it.
That day, when Baiyue asked why he could continuously forgive Tangmo’s immature actions, Luo’er did not dare to answer. Maybe Baiyue also held a significant place in his heart, but at the same time, he found it hard to let go of Tangmo. If Tangmo could become as mature and sensible as Baiyue, it might ease his pressure a lot, but at the same time, he would find it hard to adapt to such a situation.
When Tangmo chose not to rely on him anymore, Luo’er would feel utterly at a loss.
He ran out of the villa. The stars were obscured by dark clouds, and unease lingered in the ominous darkness around him, causing an inexplicable sense of panic. But once he thought of Tangmo, he gritted his teeth and ran in the direction where she had disappeared.
Tangmo wandered aimlessly in the dark and eerie forest like a walking dead, her heart feeling empty. The nocturnal animals in the forest were starting to stir, and the forest was filled with their bustling sounds. Fluorescent fireflies drifted around in the air, and on the ground, poisonous snakes and beasts also began their nocturnal hunt.
She painfully recalled the day when they jumped off the airship. They watched helplessly as the airship exploded and disintegrated in the sky above before crashing into the forest, but Luo’er was nowhere to be seen.
When all hope seemed lost, Luo’er miraculously appeared before them, instantly releasing their pent-up emotions.
Perhaps since then, Luo’er had been bearing the pain in his body and led them in carrying out the mission. He handled everything by himself without telling anyone about his pain, suffering silently on his own.
Thinking of Luo’er enduring months of pain because of her made Tangmo feel a wave of heart-wrenching pain. Though he had repeatedly reassured her not to blame herself for that day’s incident, how could she let go so easily?
Magic Erosion Disease was previously just an abstract magical disease in her mind, but since Luo’er mentioned his parents’ tragic love story, Tangmo developed a profound fear of this disease.
She once thought that as sub-humans, their body structure wouldn’t be affected by Magic Erosion Disease and that they couldn’t contract the disease. But what she didn’t know was that both Earthlings and Otherworlders could succumb to Magic Erosion Disease.
The severity of Magic Erosion depended on an individual’s Magic Resistance. The higher the Magic Resistance of the body, the harder it was to cope with the erosion caused by magic. This applies to both Earthlings and Otherworlders.
She stood blankly in a clearing in the forest, surrounded by predatory beasts and poisonous snakes that had set their eyes on her as a tasty prey.
Tangmo closed her eyes, slightly lifted her hand holding the magic wand, and unconsciously murmured spells. In an instant, a wall of fire appeared around her, and the roaring flames immediately scared away the surrounding predators.
This kind of magic casting was so simple to her that it almost didn’t require her to think. But recalling the sight of Luo’er vomiting blood because of her magic, she felt a sudden sadness, and angrily broke her magic wand and threw it off to a side.
She knelt on the ground and began to sob helplessly and guiltily. The flames continued to burn, slowly spreading out and reducing the dried leaves to ashes.
Tangmo silently watched the fire in front of her. The tears in her eyes refracted the light from the fire into a glistening glow.
"Why am I always useless!" Tangmo lowered her head, and tears immediately dripped from the corners of her eyes onto the ground.
"Because you’re worthless, an idiot!" Suddenly, such a thought rudely barged into her mind. Not even she knew why she had such a thought and even addressed herself as ’you’.
"I’m an idiot, an innocent fool!" Tangmo laughed at herself, making a painful self-evaluation.
"Yes, you’re right, you are worthless!" At that moment, the same thought surfaced in her mind again, causing her to feel inexplicably frightened.
It was as if someone had invaded her mind and was controlling her thoughts. Whenever she thought of something, her thoughts were immediately manipulated, and she was harshly criticized.