Hey Miss. Karayeh! Good morning, and how are you? I hope you're fine and you've successfully memorized the meaning of hydrocarbons? I'm sorry I hadn't showed up for two days for our lunch date. Try not to miss me much.
Dr. Aashif.
This was it, the message that broke Sadeeq's heart without even knowing who the hell the sender was. What did he meant by lunch date? She lunch date him or what? She should try not to miss him? Who the hell is this Dr. Aashif and what does he think of himself to text these words to his wife. Wait...why is he even angry? They made an agreement that whenever she found the one she loved, he would set her free.
It shouldn't bother him, she should start loving someone for them to be able to walk their ways differently, soon. He gulped down a lump in his throat and pinched the bridge between his eyes. This was something....he couldn't even put the emotions in words.
He was deep in thoughts when a call jerked him out, Sadeeq heaved a sigh and picked the call, Ummu called Ihsan's line not his. This showed she was angry at him.
"Assalamu Alaikum." He was sure she didn't heard his salam because she had already started ranting question. That's his Ummu, didn't she think that if it was Ihsan that picked the call she would rant off her ears with these questions? And not being able to have the energy to answer back?
"Ihsan, how are you? Are you at the hospital already? Has he taken care of you? How are you feeling? No tears? No cravings right?" She was talking, and Sadeeq could imagine how she was pacing to and fro in their living room with Manaal beside her every step, all of them agitated.
"Ummu, it's Sadeeq. She's in the hospital already, you need not to worry about that please. I don't think it's something serious to be agitated about, she'd be fine." His voice has sounded low and broken that if everyone would mistook it for his worry towards Ihsan being sick.
"Not something to be agitated about? Sadeeq this shows you haven't take this illness serious. She can be infected with a disease, or worst she's suffering from Malaria. Sadeeq please take care of her, this girl isn't strong as you think." She was at the verge of tearing up, and Sadeeq knew if she could, she would've been in the hospital by now. Nothing agitated her more than Ihsan's illness, not even theirs.
"How will she be infected with Malaria here? Ummu you're just stressing yourself."
"I'm stressing myself right? This is your responsibility, Sadeeq. She's your wife for god sake, do you know what that means? Sadeeq do you even know what having a wife means? Her rights over her? How can your wife be there battling for her life and you're telling me that I'm just stressing myself? Fear Allah wallahi.
Ihsan cried about this union, she said who would take care of her when she gets married to you? We all objected thinking you what what's right to do, but I guess we're wrong. Don't hurt her, Sadeeq. She fights emotionally and mentally, she's a physical fight survivor. Sadeeq..."
"Ummu...you're taking this to a level..." she cut him off, and there comes the marriage lecture he never had the chance to have, and it contributed so much to disrupting the remains of strength in him. Ummu jumbled up his mind with her words. Ihsan is indeed his wife. Subhanallah.
Ummu ended the call and he had to cup his face into his hands, heaving out breaths to tame down the rage of his heart. He didn't know it had taken this long until the nurse came to him and told him he can go in to see her. She was admitted in room 4.
He pushed the door and there she was, lying down peacefully on the bed, and if he could, the ribs on her chest could be counted, and he could take in the rhythm of her heart beat. She looked peaceful, and that twitched his heart before Dr. Aashif's message flashed through his mind.
He walked over to the bed and sat down on the chair beside the bed, and within him an urge to feel the coldness of her feeble fingers overpowered him and he entwined their hands. He brought their hands and planted a kiss on hers.
"Are you really my wife?" Ummu's words had put some senses into him, and he just realized that he's a husband and should act like one. And none was his wife other than this frail lady on this hospital bed with an intravenous fluid attached to her hand and she couldn't even move a finger.
"Ihsan you're really my wife right? As in the kind of wife the prophet SAW told us to marry. Just like Ummu is to Abbu, Maama is to Daada, you are to me. Would I be able to love you? Would I be able to put a genuine smile on your lips just like Abbu makes Ummu smile tenfold of her real smile? Ihsan can I make you fall in love with me that even a distance of thousand mile wouldn't separate us, just like Maama and Daada had their way back together? Ihsan...would you bore me a child?" He couldn't continue, this was taking a huge toll on him as if the knot was tied minutes ago.
He pushed forwards the chair and placed his head beside her on the best, very close to her left bust that he could feel the beat of her heart. It was slow and melodic at some point. He closed his eyes to relish in the warmth, the feeling and the realization of the creature beside him, and sleep overtook his soul with their hands entwined, and his ears feeling the rhythmic beat of her heart.
•
Ihsan started opening her eyes, she had forgotten what happened before she dashed out until she felt the IV attached to her body and the weakened hand it was attached to. Then she remembered, she was in pain may be hours ago or days ago, who knows? She remembered calling Sadeeq and he ended the call, then she called Abbu, and Sadeeq knocked on her door before she dashed out.
Tears made their ways out of her eyes sockets, she needed Daada more than she had ever needed him in her life. And her Maama, she wanted to see them all. This country is suffocating her, everything here was draining her soul, she wasn't only healthily sick, she's sick; physically and emotionally. She want to go home.
Trying to lift her left hand to clear away her tears, Ihsan felt her hand entwined in a tight grip as if the person holding her depended his life on her. She squirmed and tried to turn and she felt his head, that's when her eyes fell on his sleeping figure, and she couldn't help but stare endlessly at him. Sadeeq.
She began coughing and that woke him up, he rushed to the fridge and brought out a bottle of water. Sadeeq poured it into the disposable cup and walked back to her. He helped her sat upright and supported her back with the pillow before he helped her drank the water.
"How are you feeling?" He asked, sitting back on the chair. The way she was looking at him had ignited something in his soul.
"I want to go home, I'm a liability on you right? I know you've never slept in a hospital before, but my sick self won't let you have peace in your life. I want to leave today, I miss Daada." And she broke into tears, what she hated the most was to think that she had constricted someone of something he or she loved because of her sickness, and it sometimes weakened her faith. Why wouldn't she be healthy even for a month?
"Did I complain? And you aren't leaving, Ihsan. We're here because of school, remember?" If care is not taken, right here, something would happen. He need to wear his mask as good as he can.
"But I need someone to take care of me, someone to tell me I'm loved and me being sick doesn't make me a liability on them. Someone to show me that my health is their top priority, something they could cancel everything for. That's why I want to be home, because that someone is Daada and Maama. I need to be with them. I need to be home."
She was crying from the bitter depth of her heart, and Sadeeq had no choice but sit beside her on the bed and he engulfed her into a side hug, slowly patting her left arm.
"I'm here for you, Ihsan. You being sick doesn't make you anything less important and worthy. You are important in our lives, and good enough to be made a priority. You have surpassed everything in our schedule, and everything can be cancelled for you. I'm that someone too. You don't need to be home, because you are home already. I'm your home."
It's finally up! Burnt castle is updated too!
Are you a poet? Slide into my dm with 'Hi! I'm a poet!' thank you.
I lost my Aunt ten days ago, say a prayer for her, May Allah enlighten her grave and forgive her shortcomings, may he make Jannah to be her home. Ameen.
Pray for me also, please.