At that moment, Hiruzen Sarutobi felt his muscles twitching beyond control. An intense pressure swelled in his abdomen—sharp pain warning of impending disaster.
He knew exactly what this meant. After all, he was old. A long life, even as the former Hokage, didn't make him immune to the basic realities of being human.
He'd been sick before. He'd had diarrhea before.
Even as the leader of Konohagakure, he'd had to visit the hospital for intestinal issues from time to time. This was nothing new.
The trajectory of Kazuki's Fire Style: Great Dragon Fire Jutsu was slightly off—it would miss and pass overhead. Hiruzen could tell it wasn't aimed directly at him. Kazuki's a good kid, he thought. He wouldn't go all out on an elder like me. That little gesture of respect warmed his heart.
Hiruzen pressed a palm to his body, trying to cast Minor Illness Extraction Technique, a basic medical ninjutsu to ease internal ailments.
He couldn't hold it anymore.
There's a saying: You can walk a hundred miles while holding your pee, but you can't take a single step with diarrhea.
Hiruzen's entire body tensed. It was coming. Fast.
But then the realization struck him like a kunai to the gut: If I, the Third Hokage, crap myself while training a genin—it's over. My reputation. My dignity. My legacy. Everything.
He'd have to move out of the village that night.
There was only one solution.
Sarutobi unleashed his Water Style: Giant Waterfall Jutsu—in a flash, a massive torrent erupted, dousing everything in front of him.
"...That intense?!" Kazuki blinked, watching the sudden wall of water smash his Great Dragon Fire apart. Did the Third just panic-cast a jutsu?
He didn't know for sure, but something about the old man's urgency felt... off.
Maybe it had something to do with the new plague effect added to Kazuki's upgraded Great Dragon Fire Technique. Yeah. That was probably it.
As the water subsided, Hiruzen stood there soaked but smiling.
"Very good. Excellent, Kazuki. You've clearly improved this technique."
"Thank you for your guidance, Lord Third," Kazuki said sincerely.
And he meant it—Hiruzen's pointers really had helped him refine the technique. Once he could launch three fire dragons at once, it would evolve into Fire Style: Dragon Flame Bombs, a significantly more advanced jutsu.
"Wait here. I'll go fetch a scroll and show you the next-level technique," Hiruzen offered with a smile, but didn't move.
"...You're a Shadow Clone, aren't you?" he asked.
Kazuki glanced over at the spot where Hiruzen had been standing just moments ago—but it was soaked in dark muddy water. The Giant Waterfall Jutsu had wiped out all traces of what might've happened there.
A short while later, Hiruzen returned—fresh clothes, clean appearance. Kazuki's expression was slightly complicated but he didn't say anything.
"Fire Style: Great Dragon Fire has an advanced form—Dragon Flame Bombs," Hiruzen explained with a teacher's patience. "It seems similar—both spew out fire dragons—but they're not the same."
Kazuki listened attentively. Hiruzen's advice had always been useful, even when his intestines were battling jutsu upgrades.
"This is a high-level Fire Release technique," Hiruzen added. "Be careful while learning it."
Kazuki thanked him again and respectfully saw him off.
"...Dragon Flame Bombs. I didn't realize there were key differences from Great Dragon Fire," Kazuki muttered thoughtfully. "But if they're all 'dragons'... what if I change the chakra nature?"
"If I shift to Lightning nature... could I launch a lightning dragon?"
That idea got him excited.
Kazuki had already learned how to alter his chakra's nature to Lightning. He didn't know many Lightning Release techniques yet, but maybe he could invent one.
Sure, Kakashi had Chidori, but that required the Sharingan to be effective—Kazuki's dynamic vision wasn't nearly good enough yet.
So he began channeling Lightning-nature chakra, shaping it using the form of Great Dragon Fire Technique—but with Lightning instead of Fire.
What followed was a disaster.
Kazuki detonated his own throat.
He rushed to Konoha Hospital before the damage worsened.
"Guess you can't just brute-force a new jutsu with chakra nature change alone..." Kazuki winced, throat still smoking slightly.
He'd learned his lesson.
Maybe he should ask Hiruzen about this sort of thing next time.
"Yo, Kazuki? Why are you here?" a familiar voice called out.
Kakashi, arms full of medicine bags, raised an eyebrow as he saw Kazuki bandaged and looking miserable.
"Oh, just... blew myself up trying a new jutsu," Kazuki said calmly.
Risk was part of the game, after all.
Kakashi blinked. "Makes sense."
Kazuki noticed the items in Kakashi's hands. "Stocking up on meds?"
"Yeah. After what happened last time, I figured it's best to prepare. Never know when we'll need them."
Then, after a moment's thought, Kakashi asked, "Fox-senpai's retiring from the ANBU... Do you think we should get her a gift or something?"
Fox wasn't their captain for long, but she'd guided them through their early ANBU phase. She was sharp, competent, and patient.
Without her, they might not have adjusted to ANBU life so smoothly.
"...Yeah, let's get her something," Kazuki said without hesitation.
Then he remembered how poor he was.
Hospital bills. Gifts. No savings. Dammit.
He was going to have to find a way to make money—fast.