I stretched in bed. For the first time in a long time, I woke up incredibly refreshed. The sun that invaded my room through the glass window barely covered by the curtain didn't bother me; on the contrary, feeling the warmth of the sun spread over my body was exceptionally pleasant.
I got out of bed and lazily crossed the room. My sisters' beds were already empty. I headed to the bathroom in the next room. The smell of coffee was intoxicatingly circulating through the upstairs, contributing to my extraordinary morning good mood.
I undressed, ready to take a shower.
***
I entered the kitchen. All the women in the house were already having breakfast, seated around the round table.
"Good morning!" I smiled. The tone of my voice sounded harmoniously cheerful.
"Looks like someone woke up in a good mood," my aunt commented, impressed. "What happened?"
I shrugged. "I don't necessarily need a reason to wake up in a good mood." For some reason, the smile on my lips remained plastered on my face. And yes, I did have a reason, but they didn't need to know.
I sat down with them, grabbed a piece of cake, and poured coffee into an empty cup on the table.
"Hmm," Aunt Ana narrowed her eyes, curious, and I could see a satisfied smile on her face, but she didn't say anything more about my "excellent" mood. "How was dinner at your fiancé's house?" she turned to my mother.
"Good," she answered briefly and indifferently.
"I wanted to go, but... I was swamped with college work."
"No problem, Edgar's son took your place."
My mother seemed upset. For what reason? I had no idea.
"Stefanny," she sighed. "You know I wanted to go..."
"What difference does it make, Ana?" she looked angry. "It's over."
"Why are you so upset?" my aunt asked, intrigued.
"Nothing!"
Of course, there was something. She just didn't want to say.
"Look," my mother sighed. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm just not in a good place."
Pretending I wasn't present in the middle of that confusion, I drank the last sip of coffee and finished the piece of cake.
I finished my breakfast and got up from the chair.
"Where are you going so early?" my mother asked.
"I need to transfer my Arts course to the college here," I put the cup on the sink.
"The college here?" Aunt Ana asked, surprised.
"What do you mean?" my mother seemed confused.
Indeed, that answer had been the least expected by them, since I had repeatedly said that I wanted to go back to London.
"I've decided to stay in Brazil," I say.
My sisters, aunt, and mother look at each other in shock.
"When did you change your mind?" My mother asks, surprised.
"Early this morning. I've been thinking a lot," I shrug.
"Well, that's great," my mother's smile widens.
"We're all so happy that you've decided to stay, Alice," my aunt chimes in, sharing the same smile as my mother.
"Well, I have to go now. I'll see you guys later," I smile and head towards the door.
"Alice!" My mother calls out to me before I leave. I turn to face her.
"I know there's a good chance you'll say no, but... you're really good at giving opinions. So...," she hesitates. "I was wondering if you'd like to come with me to pick out my wedding dress."
I nod, which surprises my mother.
"Wait. You agreed?" Her facial expression looks scared.
I let out a small chuckle seeing her reaction. Possibly, my old self would have been scared too. But honestly, I didn't care about that wedding anymore. I had to move forward and couldn't nurture impetuous hatred towards something I couldn't avoid.
"I didn't expect you to agree so easily," my mother says.
"I don't care anymore, Mom," I shrug. "Your life is yours. Your decisions are yours alone. And... I want to focus on me. On my future," I pause for a moment, taking a deep breath. "And... I want you to focus on yours too. If you think marrying Edgar will make you happy, then it's okay with me. I just want the best for you."
I squeeze my lips into a small smile and continue on my way out of the house.
***
The day had gone by in a flash. I had successfully requested to transfer the remaining semesters of my course to a Brazilian college. I initially intended to grow artistically in my mother country and then expand overseas. As a Brazilian, and with a better understanding of the place, I would have an easier time investing, especially since I had a good amount of money for it.
I receive a message from my father asking if the transfer went well. I reply to his question and let him know that I'm going to a bridal shop with my mom.
I step out of the taxi and make my way inside the store. My mother is already there, almost having a breakdown of indecision.
"I'm so glad you're here," she says relieved as she sees me walk in. "There are so many options here that...," she takes a deep breath. "I have no idea."
I look around, superficially analyzing some of the dresses that I can see. There are many more upstairs. I notice one that I like.
"Why don't you try on that one with the mermaid tail?" I suggest.
"Do you think it will look good on me?" She seems unsure. I give her an encouraging smile and nod my head.
"You will look beautiful in any of them," I say with the intention of encouraging her. She returns my smile, and if I didn't know her, I would be certain that she was about to burst into tears in front of the saleswoman.
My mother nods and takes the dress to the fitting room. I sit on a small red sofa, waiting for her to return.
A little while later, she comes back. I admire her, enchanted. I was right, I knew she would look beautiful. My mother was stunningly incredible.
"What do you think?" she asks a little shyly.
"You look beautiful." I can't hide my delight and, even less, how emotional I was to see her dressed like that.
"Are you okay, honey?" she asks when she sees me sniffling. I nod and try to avoid the emotion that made me want to cry.
"Do you think I should try others? Or..."
"That dress is perfect on you," I assure her.
She nods, still smiling, and confirms with the saleswoman that she will take it. Soon, she goes back to change.
I hear the bell on the door sound. I glance over to see who just came in. I am surprised to see who it is.
"Dad?!" I observe him, curious. "What are you doing here?" I slide my gaze slightly to Agatha on the other side of him.
"I came to pick up Agatha from ballet class. And she asked me to see her mother at the bridal dress shop."
I look at Agatha, she was bouncing with joy to be here.
"But... I'm already leaving. Do you want a ride?" he asks me.
"Ian?"
My mother comes out of the fitting room. And as incredible as it may seem, seeing them just a few meters away seemed like those scenes from romance movies, where the moment passed slowly, focusing on the loving protagonists. And if I wasn't becoming a little paranoid, I had noticed a spark still residing in my parents.
"Agatha wanted to see you," he explains. "But I'm already leaving..."
"No, it's okay. You can stay. Your daughters are here."
I look curiously at my mother. Was she understanding of my father now? What had changed between them?
"And... I wanted to thank you for helping me with... that thing." Her expression conveyed gratitude.
"I hope everything went well." My father returns her smile.
I observe them curiously. What were they talking about?
Once again, the bell on the door sounds. This time, Edgar appears. And soon, that atmosphere that seemed to be going on between my parents ends.
"Ian? You're here?" he looks at my father, whom I used to call "what the hell are you doing here? Get out before I give you a black eye!"
"I came to drop off Agatha. But, I'm already leaving."
"Ah." Edgar nods. "And you, love? Are you ready?"
My mother nods, and suddenly, that excited expression that existed on her face before gradually loses its intensity.
"I've already scheduled your Botox on your face for late this afternoon. Finally, you won't have any more wrinkles, dear," he comments in a particular tone, but I could still hear him, and it took only a few seconds of discernment for me to find myself shocked.
Wrinkles? What does he mean??! Her skin was perfect for a woman over forty. And for someone who wanted to undergo a cosmetic procedure, she was very discouraged.
"Edgar..." she whispers something in his ear. And that ‘something’ draws an angry look from Edgar.
"But of course you want it! You need it!" His tone of voice sounded altered, making me doubt his actions.
"Is everything okay?" I interfere, looking coldly at Edgar.
"Of course." He smiles. "Let's go." He slides his hand to my mother's wrist, about to drag her out of the store.
"Hey! Wait a minute." I get up from the couch and approach them, perspicacious. "Are you sure everything's okay? Mom?" I stare at her in the eyes. I feared that something serious was happening between them.
"We're a little late..." Edgar begins, but is interrupted by my mother.
"Enough!" she alters the tone of her voice. In a abrupt act, she removes Edgar's hand from her wrist. "That's it for me!"
I observe her attitude and see her rigorously remove the engagement ring from her ring finger.
"I don't want to marry you anymore! You selfish, arrogant man!" she throws the ring towards Edgar. "If you want a porcelain doll, you won't find it in me!" she spits out the words. "It's all over." she finishes and walks out of the store.
Shocked by what had just happened, I don't think twice and follow my mother, stunned by what had just happened.
"Mom!" I stop behind her. "Are you okay?"
She takes a deep breath and turns to me. The huge smile from before Edgar's arrival reappears on her lips.
"I feel...liberated." She expresses, satisfied.
"What was that? What happened?"
"I thought all morning about what you said. If staying with Edgar would make me happy." She shakes her head. "He just wanted a young woman to satisfy him. He didn't want to accept the imperfections of age." She lets out a nasal laugh, in irony. "I'm not going to change my appearance because of someone who doesn't accept another person's old age," she says determinedly. "But I deserved this frustration. It's the price I'm paying for wanting to be with someone for money."
"Hey, it's okay. Who hasn't made mistakes, let them throw the first stone, right? What matters is that you were able to see beyond that."
"And it was thanks to you, dear." She looked at me kindly. "I just have to thank you."
I smile and hug her. I couldn't express how proud I was of my mother for deciding to follow the right path.
My father and Agatha leave the store, standing next to us. Ian clears his throat.
"So...do you want a ride?" he asks.
My mother releases our embrace and nods her head.
"It's good to be back with my family." Her gaze rests harmoniously on my father.
Did that mean anything?