There. He had admitted that part out loud to someone other than the nagging echo in his subconscious. Darius let the silence settle as he looked Livia up and down. She stood rigid, arms at her sides, her expression unreadable. She didn’t even blink. He could almost hear the thoughts rattling in her skull– He’s lost it. He’s gone completely, raving mad.
"Did you hear me?" Darius asked.
Livia flinched when she registered his words, he looked her up and down. Finally, she sighed and turned her back to him, she crossed her hands and shook her head. She sighed and looked up to the ceiling, hoping there would be some mishap that would take her away from this abominable situation.
"I heard you," Livia said finally.
The woman laughed, an empty sound. She cut her eyes toward him, not bothering to hide the ache behind her scorn. "I just hoped this might be some sort of dream. Tell me it is."
Darius pursed his lips and tilted his head to the side. "You know it is not."
Livia huffed, a bitter sound. Her gaze dropped to the floor, and for a moment, a flicker of a half-smile ghosted over her face, too quick to mean anything. She prided herself in being someone who was able to move forward and to deal with things quickly, but this situation was too alien to her. It almost felt like she had been tossed into the deep of a river with iron shackles to her feet.
"Why not?" Darius asked. "She told me so many things will be okay, even I am not foolish enough to go on in life like that but..."
Darius trailed off and he looked at the window, the sun was streaking to the west now. "I felt completely calm. When she looks at me, I do believe everything will be okay. She is kind and thoughtful, do you want to tell me that is not true as well?"
Silence answered him. He turned back to Livia, only to find her staring at him with a look that unsettled him more than rage or disappointment ever could. It was the same expression she wore the day she told him there would be no open-casket funeral for her parents.
"I... I cannot say," Livia said.
"I am sorry, this is strange for me as it is for you, but I am not sure I can honour your wishes without plunging myself into grief."
"I see," Livia murmured.
"Do you think I am selfish for this?" Darius asked solemnly.
Livia walked back to the seat and sank into it, she watched as the birds flew freely in the sky. How had it come to this? she thought. She could almost smell the lavender from their childhood bedroom, could almost hear their younger selves huddled beneath the covers, daring each other to tell the most terrifying story, both pretending not to be the first to run. ᴛʜɪs ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ɪs ᴜᴘᴅᴀᴛᴇ ʙʏ N0veI.Fiɾe.net
"No," she said finally.
Darius’ eyes widened slightly, he had not been expecting that to be her reply. He was prepared to continue arguing with her until she gave in, even if it was just an inch, he was willing to take it.
"Really?" Darius asked.
"Yes. You are not selfish," Livia replied quietly. Her tone carried no softness, only weariness. "But do you think you are right? If something were to happen and the people knew she was a rogue... it would be nothing but disaster for us all."
Darius grunted and he shifted on the chair. "I suppose so, but we are too far gone."
"I am not sure what else to say to you that would make you see reason," Livia said.
Darius flashed her a smile. "Give up."
Livia remained rooted to the chair and she opened her mouth to speak when a knock on the door came. They exchanged confused glances, and then Darius cleared his throat. He dusted his pants and waited for the stranger to let themselves in.
The doorknob twisted, and then Ryker revealed himself. He looked between Darius and Livia and then shut the door.
"Alpha. Livia," Ryker greeted.
Livia murmured a reply, her gaze settling blankly ahead. Darius stood, acknowledging his Beta with a respectful dip of the head, then gestured to the seat beside Livia.
"What do you have for me?" he asked as he sat back down.
Ryker walked briskly and took a seat. "I hope I am not interrupting anything important?"
Darius observed his right-hand man and shook his head. "Nothing at all."
Ryker was an important person to him, they picked up after each other’s slack for years now. How he had come to be his Beta was such a strange tale.
They had known each other since childhood, Ryker always the louder presence, a few years older and once the apprentice to Magnus. Some had joked that Ryker was like Magnus’ second son. Darius had never liked the comparison.
Their lessons never overlapped much, mostly because when they did, it ended in shouting matches and bruised egos. Darius, introverted and quiet, had bristled at Ryker’s brash confidence.
But during the black storm of his mother’s death, Ryker had been one of the few to stay. Through thick and thin, Ryker stuck. And who else would have been the best pick for a Beta other than Ryker? Their partnership had worked and Ironshade was returned to a stable pack after Magnus’ death.
The past year had been trying on everyone, with the skirmishes, disputes, the curse, and now Serena. A ’problem’ that divided the Council that ruled Ironshade. But there were lines, even in loyalty. Darius had never breathed a word to him about the mating bond. Some truths, even Ryker couldn’t be trusted to hold without consequence.
Livia blinked slowly. She had never liked Ryker in her childhood days, and now as an adult. No apology was ever given for the insulting remark he made about her parents.
"I see," Ryker began, pulling a sealed envelope from his coat. "I’ve received a request. From the Dawnbreak messenger."