“Sarah! That’s twice in a year you’ve come to this door. You’ll have to be careful you don’t start making it a habit, not that I mind. Come in.”
“Thank you, but this isn’t exactly a social call. We need to talk, Ben. Are you free?”
Sarah had questioned herself for the entire drive over to Ben's house and had almost turned back more than once.
“Sure, take a seat. What’s wrong? You look like shit, I'm afraid to say.”
Forcing a laugh, she sat down on the leather sofa and pulled in a deep breath. Her stomach was tied up in more knots than Fort Knox had locks and nervous nausea was rising in her throat.
“You’re going to want to sit and please, stay calm. I don’t want any sudden bursts of furriness.”
“What shit have you gotten into? You never could stay out of trouble…”
“It's not me. Please, just sit,” Sarah said. She blew out as Benjamin sat down in the armchair opposite her, watching her intently. “This isn't going to be easy to hear but I don't know where else to turn. It’s your son, Aiden…”
“My what?”
“Son, Ben. Your son. He’s in some shit and I’m asking for you to help.”
“Woah. Hold on, Sarah. I don’t know what you’ve heard but there’s never been anyone since you. Nobody. Definitely not no bloody son.”
Sarah felt her heart warm. She had always presumed he would move on and find a new mate. She never expected him to stay alone for all these years and him saying he had, made her heart flutter.
“Our son…”
Her eyes brimmed to bursting as Benjamin's jaw dropped and he shook his head in disbelief. The six feet one inch giant of a man looked broken as the reality of her words hit home.
“Our son? But you said…”
“I know and I won’t ever forgive myself for that but I had no choice. Nothing I can say will make that unforgivable lie any better but right now, we have to concentrate on Aiden.”
“No!” Benjamin stood so quickly that Sarah flinched back. Unsure of what to do, she looked around for her fastest escape route, even though she knew it was pointless if he shifted.
“You don’t get to come here after all these years and drop that bombshell, Sarah, then expect me not to ask questions or react in any way. How many years has it been and you couldn’t tell me until now? How many, Sarah?”
Her mouth opened but her words were silent as the tears fell down her cheeks in waves. She had wanted to tell him so many times before but was too afraid of what he would say and as time went by, the lie had become easier to ignore.
“Answer me!” Ben roared.
“Twenty-nine,” she squealed, jumping out of her skin. Her shoulders heaved with the tears of guilt she had carried for so long. All those years of keeping that secret to herself, never letting a soul find out, until now, was too much to bear.
“Twenty fucking nine bastard year’s, Sarah. I’ve missed out on twenty-nine years of his life and for what? Do your parents know? I bet they had a real laugh at that, didn’t they? The Alpha who wouldn’t stand up and be a man wouldn’t even accept his cub. Was that it? Was that what they said?”
“No,” she wailed. “They don’t know. Even now, they don't know. I switched him. I ran away from the palace and I switched him. I gave up our son to protect him from everyone who would hurt him, including us and I hate myself every damn day for what I did.”
Benjamin's legs seemed to buckle underneath his bull framed weight and he hit the floor with a thud. “You did what?”
The look of disgrace on his face was burned into the back of her eyelids, offering no escape from the shame as she covered her face and cried.
“Sarah, talk to me…”
His voice was calmer but there was still an edge to it. An edge that told her not to test his patience. Trying to calm her sobs, Sarah looked into his beautiful eyes and found them filled with pain.
“I'm sorry. I didn’t know what else to do. I was scared and alone and they bound me. They took my wings and locked me in the castle. One of the staff helped me run away and hid me for a while but then I started to show and I had to leave. You know my father would never have allowed me to keep Aiden. You know that, Ben. It was easier for the princess to run away and hide her baby, rather than have the king kill him and probably me, too.”
“Why didn’t you come to me…”
The guilt that crept onto his face told Sarah he already knew the answer to his question and instantly regretted asking.
“You know why I couldn’t do that, Ben. Believe me, I wanted to but I couldn’t. I was already hurting enough and couldn't face your rejection again.”
Ben nodded. "I was hurting, too. I was meant to become Alpha and the pack, my father, all of them…”
“I know,” Sarah said, “But I didn’t know it back then. I regret what I did more than you can possibly imagine but I can’t change it. Heaven knows that I wish I could. I just wasn’t strong enough to stand up for what I loved.”
Benjamin nodded and wiped his eyes. “Neither was I. Every day since that day, I have wished it was different, that things had gone differently. Every day I’ve prayed that you had found someone who would be the man that I couldn’t be. I guess both of us ended up losing more than we bargained for.”
"We did, but we can't change that now. The past has gone but our future is here and right now, our future needs his father's help."